Please don't be disappointed

[TakingABreak 2,733]

My mom is coming on Friday. I haven't seen her since surgery. She has been a big supporter through these last 3 months. I'm very lucky to have had her. But, I'm afraid she will be disappointed when she sees my body. She always calls and asks "what is your number" and I tell her. She is very petite and thin person-- always has been. I think in her eyes 75lbs is a HUGE amount, and it is a big amount. But to her, will she be disappointed when she sees I'm still fat? About a month or more ago, I sent her a video to show her my baggy clothes and my newly slimmer face. She called me hysterically crying. She was so proud of me. I think I was only down 50lbs at this point. I had this weird reaction to it, because I thought maybe it was a fake reaction. I couldn't see this big difference in myself. Needless to say, I'm going to squeeze into my new Spanx and hope she's not disappointed!

[FluffyChix 17,418]

Awww! ((hugs)) She loves you and you've made amazing progress. I understand your feelings. They are real. Be real. Be you. Don't Spanx it unless it makes YOU feel great--not for anyone else hon!!!

But glom on to how proud she is going to be of you getting healthy. I'm sure like many of our family, they have all been worried about us!! Glad you get to spend time with her this weekend!!!

[TakingABreak 2,733]

3 minutes ago, FluffyChix said:

Awww! ((hugs)) She loves you and you've made amazing progress. I understand your feelings. They are real. Be real. Be you. Don't Spanx it unless it makes YOU feel great--not for anyone else hon!!!

But glom on to how proud she is going to be of you getting healthy. I'm sure like many of our family, they have all been worried about us!! Glad you get to spend time with her this weekend!!!

Thank you! And the Spanx are for me . I think its just the added boost of confidence that I like about them.

[Mattymatt 491]

18 minutes ago, AshAsh1 said:

My mom is coming on Friday. I haven't seen her since surgery. She has been a big supporter through these last 3 months. I'm very lucky to have had her. But, I'm afraid she will be disappointed when she sees my body. She always calls and asks "what is your number" and I tell her. She is very petite and thin person-- always has been. I think in her eyes 75lbs is a HUGE amount, and it is a big amount. But to her, will she be disappointed when she sees I'm still fat? About a month or more ago, I sent her a video to show her my baggy clothes and my newly slimmer face. She called me hysterically crying. She was so proud of me. I think I was only down 50lbs at this point. I had this weird reaction to it, because I thought maybe it was a fake reaction. I couldn't see this big difference in myself. Needless to say, I'm going to squeeze into my new Spanx and hope she's not disappointed!

Nope, she sure won't be. A 75 pound difference on a person is marked. She will notice and probably be super proud of you.

[Orchids&Dragons 9,047]

If she was that supportive over the phone, she'll be over-the-moon in person. Wait til she gets a chance to hug you and see how much further her arms go around!

[TakingABreak 2,733]

Thank you @Orchids&Dragons I'm probably over thinking it entirely! I just want to make her proud.

[TakingABreak 2,733]

6 minutes ago, Mattymatt said:

Nope, she sure won't be. A 75 pound difference on a person is marked. She will notice and probably be super proud of you.

Thank you! I'm starting to notice it myself and I know in my heart it is noticeable, but its hard to be confident this early on!

[frust8 963]

I'm a mom, let me tell you, she is proud already. You may be a grown-up adult and I'm sure she accepts that. Please remember down deep inside her you are still her baby, the little girl she rocked, sang lullabies to,the little one she. promised herself to raise to be a good human being. She is going to be so very proud of and for you. Moms know when you hurt, sometimes before you yourself realize it. Call it Mom-Dar, call it anything you wish but it is an universal trait. She will throw her arms around you, hug you for all she's worth and maybe cry a little. But proud? Honey she will,be over the moon proud!

Sent from my VS880PP using BariatricPal mobile app

[TakingABreak 2,733]

Just now, frust8 said:

I'm a mom, let me tell you, she is proud already. You may be a grown-up adult and I'm sure she accepts that. Please remember down deep inside her you are still her baby, the little girl she rocked, sang lullabies to,the little one she. promised herself to raise to be a good human being. She is going to be so very proud of and for you. Moms know when you hurt, sometimes before you yourself realize it. Call it Mom-Dar, call it anything you wish but it is an universal trait. She will throw her arms around you, hug you for all she's worth and maybe cry a little. But proud? Honey she will,be over the moon proud!

Sent from my VS880PP using BariatricPal mobile app

Thanks Frust! I needed to hear those things!

[Czuck1983 114]

2 hours ago, AshAsh1 said:

My mom is coming on Friday. I haven't seen her since surgery. She has been a big supporter through these last 3 months. I'm very lucky to have had her. But, I'm afraid she will be disappointed when she sees my body. She always calls and asks "what is your number" and I tell her. She is very petite and thin person-- always has been. I think in her eyes 75lbs is a HUGE amount, and it is a big amount. But to her, will she be disappointed when she sees I'm still fat? About a month or more ago, I sent her a video to show her my baggy clothes and my newly slimmer face. She called me hysterically crying. She was so proud of me. I think I was only down 50lbs at this point. I had this weird reaction to it, because I thought maybe it was a fake reaction. I couldn't see this big difference in myself. Needless to say, I'm going to squeeze into my new Spanx and hope she's not disappointed!

I'm sure she will see the major difference and be extremely proud of you. It sounds like you have a great relationship and no matter what she is going to be excited that you are making positive changes in your life. You are always going to be your own harshest critic... you see yourself in the mirror every day, so the changes appear less drastic to your own eyes. If mom hasn't seen you in person for that long, trust me, the first thing she will notice is the difference.

75 lbs is a great progress in 3 months, and everyone's weight loss journey is different, so don't be hard on yourself if you feel you should have lost more. I'm sure your mom knows that it's a long journey and won't expect that you'd be at your goal weight just yet... that takes time, and you shouldn't even be expecting to be at that point yet...

You're doing great, and you should be proud of yourself first and foremost... I can't imagine any loving mother would feel anything but the same.

[TakingABreak 2,733]

I'm sure she will see the major difference and be extremely proud of you. It sounds like you have a great relationship and no matter what she is going to be excited that you are making positive changes in your life. You are always going to be your own harshest critic... you see yourself in the mirror every day, so the changes appear less drastic to your own eyes. If mom hasn't seen you in person for that long, trust me, the first thing she will notice is the difference.
75 lbs is a great progress in 3 months, and everyone's weight loss journey is different, so don't be hard on yourself if you feel you should have lost more. I'm sure your mom knows that it's a long journey and won't expect that you'd be at your goal weight just yet... that takes time, and you shouldn't even be expecting to be at that point yet...
You're doing great, and you should be proud of yourself first and foremost... I can't imagine any loving mother would feel anything but the same.

Always count on you to give me the right words! Thanks

[Czuck1983 114]

14 minutes ago, AshAsh1 said:

Always count on you to give me the right words! Thanks

Anytime... always happy to help.

[Kay07 734]

I agree with the other posters. You have come so far, and achieved wonderful results. 75lbs is such a huge, wonderful achievement you should take a moment and let that sink in. We are our own hardest critiques. If we do something great, it never seems as big of a deal than it would be if someone we loved achieved something similar, you know? So when she does arrive, bask in her joy and steal a little of it for yourself. Let her excitement and love kick that voice inside your head saying "it's not that much," or "I'm still fat" to the curb!

[TakingABreak 2,733]

1 minute ago, Kay07 said:

I agree with the other posters. You have come so far, and achieved wonderful results. 75lbs is such a huge, wonderful achievement you should take a moment and let that sink in. We are our own hardest critiques. If we do something great, it never seems as big of a deal than it would be if someone we loved achieved something similar, you know? So when she does arrive, bask in her joy and steal a little of it for yourself. Let her excitement and love kick that voice inside your head saying "it's not that much," or "I'm still fat" to the curb!

Your words hit the spot! thank you!

[Biddy zz 🏳️🌈 1,004]

Oh man, you are a star - I see your numbers - if she cried on the phone, she’ll be inconsolable in person!!

Those who love us are proud - many have been wishing thinner, healthier on us for years!

Please let us know how it goes?