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3 months post op...... My mind and soul are turning to mush



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I have just hit 3 months post-op. Yes I'm still losing weight but I feel like it's still a very slow process. I don't understand why sometimes I eat one or two bites and I'm so full and other times I feel like I don't get full even after eating almost a cup of food. Lots of new changes just happened to start at the time of my operation. My son started acting out at school, I had my oldest move back in with her significant other and the baby. They've been in the doctor's office so many times. I lost my father-in-law to cancer. I also started a full-time job sitting all day in a field like I've never done before so my stress of those little higher from that as well. Holy s*** this whole process is truly life changing for me. The only thing that is the same as before as my shoe size.

Right now I don't know if I have buyer's remorse or I should have waited a bit longer to get this done. I know this is supposed to be life-changing. But it seems like my life is turning so many different Corners right now I don't know which way to go.

I am currently lost looking for my way the new me.... apparently what I had in mind was not what the universe had in mind. So now I'm completely lost I'm where the hell I should be. I've only lost 34 pounds since my surgery I thought that number would be a little bit higher. I was expecting one to two pound still a week right now. Yes overall I am halfway to my goal.... I am just not so sure on what I'm doing wrong. Is it normal to feel like the whole world is overwhelming and your going batshit crazy.... I don't feel like I'm depressed right now I just feel very tired... My soul is in need of some good mojo..... I still feel like I'm missing a piece to this puzzle. ....

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2 hours ago, willowwaters said:

So now I'm completely lost I'm where the hell I should be. I've only lost 34 pounds since my surgery I thought that number would be a little bit higher.

Normal progress, give or take a couple of pounds.

I am 15 weeks, 4 days post-op and I have lost only 19.8kg (43.65 pounds) and that is on he back of swimming at least a mile and a half almost every day since mid-November.

Just do the basic eating and drinking right and try to side-step a little of the pain and anxiety of the other changes in your life. It's too late to focus on buyer's remorse or bad timing. Make the best of what you've got.

Re-focus yourself to make yourself the priority. Be open with your house-guests and family and press them for more support.

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yeah i am trying to refocus now.... hopefully I can figure this out... it' just life never slows down at all. Haha... you would think as mich as i run around i would of hit my goal by now

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Take a deep breath and I know you have a lot on your plate, but I cant not stress how important therapy is at this point. It is amazing to have someone to help you recognize your mental gains, and value you unconditionally. Not only that they walk with you through all the life crap too.

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Hi - I had my surgery on 11/1 so a bit after you but I share all of the same feelings. Yesterday I had my 3 month checkup with the surgeon and felt MUCH better afterward so I will share with you: he told me that at 3 months they would expect to see 45% of excess weight gone. And they measure not from surgery date ( I've only lost 26 since surgery) but from your weight when you started the program. That made sense to me. So applying that math, I have lost 44% of my excess weight. Close, right??

If you apply that equation to your weight loss I think you are winning as well!! It looks to me that you have lost 42% of your total EXCESS ( using 266 as a starting point). Good job girl!!

Life does get heavy sometimes. And this process is work, no doubt about it. Just know that you are not alone.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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    • KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
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