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Upset and disgusted



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What do YOU do when you look in mirror and still don't like what you see? I've lost 27lbs since I started on this journey and I don't see any changes. I got dressed for work this morning and saw a side view and I still look like I'm pregnant. Since I'm not, that has me upset and disgusted. I know it takes time, but I find it so discouraging. My co-workers and family see the difference, but I still can't. I barely eat 1000 cal a day and exercise at least 3 times a week. I don't know what else to do. Help!

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You will totally find highs and lows during the band weightloss journey. I have had those exact feelings you just described. Look in the mirror and see no progress. In fact, I still do. My only advice is to set little goals and totally Celebrate them! For me I celebrate each ten pound loss. I finally ran a complete lap at the gym - not a fast lap by any means but I didn't stop to walk.... another celebration. If you approach it as one little accomplishment at a time you'll see the rewards and keep going. If you are only focused on the final weight - the journey will be so long and tiring. Hang in there 27 lbs is great!

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You need to take pictures and compare them. I have lost 75 pounds and see no difference in the mirror. But when I look at pictures I can definitely see it.

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What do YOU do when you look in mirror and still don't like what you see? I've lost 27lbs since I started on this journey and I don't see any changes. I got dressed for work this morning and saw a side view and I still look like I'm pregnant. Since I'm not, that has me upset and disgusted. I know it takes time, but I find it so discouraging. My co-workers and family see the difference, but I still can't. I barely eat 1000 cal a day and exercise at least 3 times a week. I don't know what else to do. Help!
1. Give it time. You've been banded less than a month, and lost almost 30 lbs. There's NOTHING in that to be upset or disgusted by.

2. Understand that fat normally comes off of the abdominal areas last. Most people see noticeable differences in the face, shoulders, arms, and even legs before they see a lick of difference in their stomach, butt, hips. You need to have patience. Know that fat is being lost, but perhaps just not in the one area you're waiting for -- yet.

3. Don't trust the mirror. When drastic change occurs over a period of days, you aren't going to see it every day. You need a way to see it "then and now" rather than "yesterday and today.: Take some pictures (I just posted re: taking pictures naked - it's the best thing you can do - IMO), or even trace your silhouette. Whatever you can do.

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o.k. don't smash the mirror but, give yourself a break. You had surgery. You took time to make this life changing choice. Hang in there. People see the difference, they look at you with honest, kind eyes. You might not be as nice when you see yourself. Celebrate the loss you have made and keep it up!

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I've lost over 100 pounds and I STILL don't see much of a difference. It takes time for your head to catch up with your weight loss. It's common and just keep doing what you are and things will work out well.

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Pictures, Pictures, Pictures. Have SOMEONE take lots of pictures of you to compare. The mirror LIES to you!! I look in the mirror and see a FAT person still, but I look at pictures, and at a size 14/16, I've still got a ways to go, but I'm really rather average looking now. You could say I've crossed the line between "fat" and "chubby" or something. At least, according to the pictures. The mirror... bleah.

YOU will see the difference LAST. It SUCKS, but it's true.

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Thanks so much for the replies! I talked to my co-workers and they told me they see the difference in my body. By the end of the day, I was feeling much better. I guess since I didn't have much of a weight loss this week, I was beginning to stress and worry. It helps to hear that others are feeling the same.

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I'm a math teacher so I'll use a little math on you. Every pound you lose represents a greater percentage of your weight than the previous pound. For example, if you weigh 300 pounds, the first 30 pounds lost is 10 percent of your weight. However, the next 30 pounds is 30/270 or about 11 percent. The next 30 pounds is 30/240 or 12.5 percent. So the more you lose, the more an objective person will see it.

However, we tend not to be objective about ourselves so we don't see it the way others do. That's why the suggested pictures can help -- for some reason -- maybe because we don't look at photos of ourselves as often as we see ourselves in the mirror -- we see ourselves more objectively in photos.

Anyway, be patient. It's not a race and this time, we can be more confident that it's the last time!

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Hi,

I agree with the pictures. I do not see the same thing in the mirror that I do in pictures. Take pictures.

Don't just rely on the visual to measure your results. Use

~ the way your clothes fit

~ your fitness level

~ your measurements with a tape measure

~ your lipid panels (blood work) to look for progress in triglycerides, LDL & HDL cholesterol

~ Body fat % via a scale that measures that or fat calipers

So many way to measure your progress. Most importantly keep a good attitude and come back from your lows as quickly as you can, like you did today. It is a long journey and we ge so impatient. You will get there.

Happy banding,

Mary

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You know, I am finding something to be different than what you all are mentioning... When I look at myself in a mirror I think I look really good! And when I put on clothes I can definitly tell I have lost. But when I see pictures of myself I think I look the same, maybe thinner in the face, but still like a big ol' heffer! Does the camera really add pounds???

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Where, I am down 50 lbs. and just saw a pic. of myself at a recent wedding...it depressed the hell out of me!!! I still look like a fat &*()&)*&)*&)&&*())(&%^&*)

lol.

oh well...

Just hang in there..what else can we do???

This board helps the most..it really does!

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The dietician I saw sugested that I use the fit of clothes to measure my weightloss and I have already marked out a pair of jeans that I can zip up (but cannot breathe in!!!) as one goal and a shirt that is made from stretchy material but still 'gapes' across my chest as another. I plan on digging out other clothes that I haven't been able to wear for so long each time I hit another target.

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    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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