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it appears i've lost my motivation ...



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:Banane35::confused:

ok, even now after i took my 'break' and came back ...

i just cant motivate myself to eat right and work out properly. the only thing i am doing 100% is my running and i know i cant do that every day.

i continue to eat garbage and i want to stop (really, i do) but it's like the old me is back saying "ok, Monday, stop eating garbage" or "ok, after your fill you can get your crap together".

its not just eating either. i had a 1/2 training session this morning and barely went thru the motions.

it seems i've even forgot why i was banded in the first place. i know to lose weight ... that's the "duh" part ... but WHY ?? to be healthier? (i am healthier now), to be able to play with DD? (no problem now), to have great ummm relations with DH? (check) ... to fit into 'normal' clothes (got it - 18/20 fits me now *down from 6XL*) ...

i need to make more/new goals i know but i dont know what i want... well i do but one of them is so freaking petty (i want to weigh less than my sister - i dunno how much she weighs but she's going up) ...

***sigh*** i just need the motivation / kick in the pants ??? to see it clearly.

i cant believe i had it and just lost it :Banane10:

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I think your quote says a lot:

Exercise for the body you want, not for the body you have.

If you're happy where you are, then can you maintain it with your current actions?

If not, can you focus on changing one thing at a time?

It sounds like you're being very hard on yourself for a bunch of different things. (Which we're all guilty of doing!) :Banane35: Try to relax and pick one thing to work on. Nix sweets for 2 weeks, work out the way you want every day for 2 weeks, etc. Just one thing. If you're spread thin, (no pun intended) then you won't have the energy to fix everything that you see is wrong.

After you've gotten good at one thing, move on to the next "problem". You'll gain confidence in yourself and the motivation will come with each accomplishment. Baby steps...

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I think what you need to do is relax and except your self right now.

Your going through an out of control stage. Accept that and give your self permission to have it!

I have found that when I give my self permission to have my days or weeks of junk that I tend to not overdue it as much as when I think Oh I'm doing horrible I can't believe I'm going to sabatosh everything I've done since I got the band, I'm a failure, holy crap I've got to get a hold of myself!

Take a deep breath. Accept what your doing say to yourself ok today I am going to eat crap. Then pat your port and say thanks for being here! Thanks for helping me get back on tract when I need to.

A kick in the pants doesn't really help help me. I think I have found that accepting where I'm at does better.

This is easy to say and easy to type, and I know I feel the same way that you do often.

You have done FANTASTIC! The beauty we have with the band is that we can have times like this. And we can monitor ourselves and we can get a fill!!

Try to keep a record in your head of how much your eating. Even on those chocolate days or ice cream days, stick to the band rules and get your protien in and your Water.

I think it is much harder when you are so close to goal becuase it is easier to say well I deserve this. Just make a goal for yourself that your going to stick to you protien goals and Water goals, and be kind to yourself.

And remind me of this when I'm ready to beat myself up!

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I think your quote says a lot:

Exercise for the body you want, not for the body you have.

If you're happy where you are, then can you maintain it with your current actions?

If not, can you focus on changing one thing at a time?

the quote right now - total farce ... :Banane35: it is meant to be motivation but it's not really working ...

i am NOT happy where i am right now though ... that's the bad thing. i HATE being 270 pounds. i want to hit goal, i really really truly do ... i just cant make myself get there.

i just want to be at goal NOOOOOOW ... that in itself should be motivation enough.

Your going through an out of control stage. Accept that and give your self permission to have it!

Take a deep breath. Accept what your doing say to yourself ok today I am going to eat crap. Then pat your port and say thanks for being here! Thanks for helping me get back on tract when I need to.

A kick in the pants doesn't really help help me. I think I have found that accepting where I'm at does better.

This is easy to say and easy to type, and I know I feel the same way that you do often.

You have done FANTASTIC! The beauty we have with the band is that we can have times like this. And we can monitor ourselves and we can get a fill!!

I think it is much harder when you are so close to goal becuase it is easier to say well I deserve this. Just make a goal for yourself that your going to stick to you protien goals and Water goals, and be kind to yourself.

And remind me of this when I'm ready to beat myself up!

i am just afraid that an out of control day/week is going to turn to an out of control month / quarter / year ... and i WILL gain if that happens.

i dont really feel i have done a fantastic job... when you start out with such a high weight, the first 50 pounds literally fell off. granted i was eating reasonably well and going to the gym every day, but it was no where as difficult as it is now..

and i still have sooo much more to lose. "only" 36 pounds to my next mini-goal, but then there will be another 45-ish to go...

i guess i just need to take it one day at a time but i just get that thru my thick head...

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Just admitting that you are unmotivated can do wonders. You have to make the choice! Make a list of WHY you got banded, you said it seems you have forgotten why---so remind yourself! You deserve more, and you are capable of much more.

We all know you, love you and believe in you---now believe in yourself. You can turn this around! YOU CAN DO IT!!

PM me if you need me, we are all here for you!

HUGS

Your band buddy!

=:Banane35:=

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Losing,

I promise you, I went through that stage. Exactly what you're talking about. It was, proportionately at the same time too. I was at 200 lbs (but I'm short and my goal is 136, so that's not so far from your 270/180 split).

The only thing I can tell you is IT PASSES. One day you'll wake up and losing weight will be more important than the junk again. For me it took about 6 weeks. I was able to maintain during that time, but I didn't lose a thing. In hind sight, that was ok. Normally, that'd have been where I shot up 50 lbs in the blink of an eye.

IT PASSES. Hang in there. Don't let yourself gain and focus on your exercise. Beating yourself up leads to more junk food as consolation, so don't do it.

Can you set a goal for yourself that's much further out? Like give yourself 3 months to lose the next 25 lbs. Then take the next month off and just focus on your exercise. Maybe even double your exercise and leave the food the same. Before you know it, you'll want to take off those lbs so your running will be more efficient.

This is just part of the process. You are not going to get stuck here permanently. Really -- I remember a time when I thought I was going to eat 800 cals of Skittles every day and never stop. I stopped. One day, I'd had enough Skittles.

Hang in there!

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((((Losing)))))

I am so proud and grateful to you that you posted this thread! Believe me, you are not alone. I think there are plenty of us here that may or may not admit to the same feelings you are having. This is a BATTLE!

I swear there is some weird place we get, maybe at the halfway mark, where we throw in the towel for a bit. There are many reasons. For one, I bet our subconcious is fighting us a bit. We are leaving our comfort zone. I know being so overweight is not comfortable, but we must have been hiding bit behind our layers and now that we are shedding them, we are WAY more vulnerable. Then there is the motivation factor. It is just friggin' hard to be so gung ho everyday. Sure, we can do it in the beginning, but as the months wear on, it gets tiring. I think it is okay to cut yourself some slack.

I went through this too. I maintained ALL summer. Someday s I ate more chips that real food. I am not proud. I don't think this was okay. But I am being honest. Then I got some fire under my ass and I am getting over it! I don't know where it came from but I am grateful that it did. The thing is, we are so quick to support one another when one is down, but we do not offer ourselves the same support. Why not??? Don't we deserve that same respect and care?

Give yourself a break. You have done amazing, hit a rut, and now you can get back to the business at hand. Keep coming here and being honest. It helps the rest of us struggling know we are "normal" and not alone!

Grab my hand and let's race to the finish!!!!!!!

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Losing you've been doing wonderful, and I am like you and having a lot of bad days all at once. The good thing is, the band is still there and it's waiting for us!!!!

I don't have any moving words of inspiration, but you're not alone. And I personally found solice in Julie's response. I'm glad it's normal. I'm glad to see it does work itself out.

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Kinda sounds like your in a rut. I get those when I diet normaly. But at least once i get the band I will not gain all that weight back plus some. For myself I am putting together a board of all the things I want to be able to do once I am at a more normal weight. Kyack, horse back rides, take my nieces to amusement parks, Wear my seat belt, wear cute shoes, Go out dancing, sit in those plastic chairs without feeling like one is going to break under me or I am going to get stuck in one.

Things like that. I am getting pictures together and hanging them on a bulitin board allong with pictures of me

i AM HOPING IT HELPS

GOOD LUCK

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Losing,

You have made amazing progress. You kept your motivation high for a year. That's a long time. I do believe that you will be able to get your head back where it needs to be. I think that Julie gave you great advice. She's been there. Maybe you just need a little break. Don't be so hard on yourself. Pat yourself on the back for what you have accomplished in a year because you deserve it.

Oh and if getting skinnier then your sister gives you motivation then use it. Who cares if it's petty ;)

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Losingjusme,

I am fairly new on this board, but I just thought I would chime in here...

I would like you to know that as soon as I found this site, I started doing monstrous amounts of reading, reading, reading, etc. You popped up mostly from what I seen in both the pix thread and in the twoterville thread, which caught my attention. Your posts caught my attention more than anyone else here, because you were so gung-ho about "getting it done". Your pictures are amazing, and your weight loss has truly astounded me.

I was second guessing the band surgery, because for some reason I kept hearing bandsters don't lose as much as rnyers. Well, I'm so glad I found this board because - now I know that simply is not true.

Even though I wasn't even here at the time you signed off, it was almost as if I felt you weren't around after reading so many posts. I'm really glad you are back.

Anyway, what I'm trying to get at is, yes, you are in a rut right now. It happens, but you have already taken the first step to getting back to it. Accepting responsibility for falling off the wagon, but coming to ask for a helping hand to get back on. I am willing to bet so much, that as you see the scale moving back into a favorable direction for you, you will regain your momentum.

I wish you the best!! ;)

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Losingjustme, we're in similar places - mentally and physically. My goal is 180 and I'm around 235. Although nicely enough today my scale plinged out a 252. Damn periods. ;) It is what it is.

I eat well, I believe. I know where I'm at in terms of portion and calories. 99% of the time I avoid white carbs. My Protein percentage is about 85%. I pay attention to fat, but do still eat full fat cottage cheese and other dairy - except milk (I drink soy milk). When I eat, which is pretty much not until the evening, I balance my meals and my groups. If I want something, I have a very controlled amount of it. I'm happy with my eating.

But I seem to have reached a point where changing the eating habits has done what it can do. I can no longer look at my diet and say "This is what I need to adjust to lose weight." I don't have much room to adjust it!

So I know that I need to look to bodyworks for the rest - metabolism, output, etc. But I hate exercise. I have 0 fun when doing it, and find it VERY hard to push that aside and do it anyway. I've realized that the "go the gym" thing doesn't work for me. I'm going to need to find a class in something, with a set time to be there. Otherwise it's too easy to excuse myself out of it.

I'm still fat, but I'm "normal" fat. Does that make sense? I was almost 400# pre-op. I was the fat person who got the second looks because I was so fat. I was the freakishly fat person. Now I'm fat, but really not much fatter than any other average fat person out there. This has given me an unwanted sense of complacency. Not to be confused with satisfaction. I'm NOT where I want to be. I WANT to lose about 50 - 70 more lbs. I WANT to lose 2 - 4 more sizes.

What kills me are my plateaus. I can go three months without any changes to scale, measurements, etc. -- and then lose 15 lbs in 3 days. Or I can not lose. I went almost 7 months of the same 4 lbs back and forth, even though I was doing things right and (then) exercising on a reliable schedule. NOTHING kills your morale faster than to be doing things right, and not seeing anything for it.

My overall average weightloss kicks ass, but my average for the last year barely registers. My overall average is so high because I was literally losing a size every 2 weeks for a while. Hahaha, I can barely remember those days.

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I totally agree Wheetsin! I kinda have that complacency thing going on. I told someone recently that my weight was "good enough". But really, I want to reach my goal. I want to lose these last 15 pounds. I know I can if I try harder, but right now I'm maintaining with little effort. We are all hard on ourselves, but honestly, Juslosin....you have come SO far in the past year and inspired so many people on the board and maybe that is pressure too. Just keep plugging along. I know the feeling that if you relax for a week or 2, it will all come back to bite ya in the rear. The motivation will come back and hopefully soon. But just make sure to take care of yourself!

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Losingjustme, we're in similar places - mentally and physically. My goal is 180 and I'm around 235. Although nicely enough today my scale plinged out a 252. Damn periods. ;) It is what it is.

I eat well, I believe. I know where I'm at in terms of portion and calories. 99% of the time I avoid white carbs. My Protein percentage is about 85%. I pay attention to fat, but do still eat full fat cottage cheese and other dairy - except milk (I drink soy milk). When I eat, which is pretty much not until the evening, I balance my meals and my groups. If I want something, I have a very controlled amount of it. I'm happy with my eating.

But I seem to have reached a point where changing the eating habits has done what it can do. I can no longer look at my diet and say "This is what I need to adjust to lose weight." I don't have much room to adjust it!

So I know that I need to look to bodyworks for the rest - metabolism, output, etc. But I hate exercise. I have 0 fun when doing it, and find it VERY hard to push that aside and do it anyway. I've realized that the "go the gym" thing doesn't work for me. I'm going to need to find a class in something, with a set time to be there. Otherwise it's too easy to excuse myself out of it.

I'm still fat, but I'm "normal" fat. Does that make sense? I was almost 400# pre-op. I was the fat person who got the second looks because I was so fat. I was the freakishly fat person. Now I'm fat, but really not much fatter than any other average fat person out there. This has given me an unwanted sense of complacency. Not to be confused with satisfaction. I'm NOT where I want to be. I WANT to lose about 50 - 70 more lbs. I WANT to lose 2 - 4 more sizes.

What kills me are my plateaus. I can go three months without any changes to scale, measurements, etc. -- and then lose 15 lbs in 3 days. Or I can not lose. I went almost 7 months of the same 4 lbs back and forth, even though I was doing things right and (then) exercising on a reliable schedule. NOTHING kills your morale faster than to be doing things right, and not seeing anything for it.

My overall average weightloss kicks ass, but my average for the last year barely registers. My overall average is so high because I was literally losing a size every 2 weeks for a while. Hahaha, I can barely remember those days.

I have been in such a rut the past three months. Losin! I understand too. It is so hard when you are feeling better... like Wheetsin said, you are satisfied yet, but you are feeling better and NO it is NOT getting easier... it just gets harder and harder to get off the lbs.

I've been there lately too. I am so glad to know that there are other out there that slow down like I have. Glad because I know that eventually I WILL keep on moving if I just stick with it!

No girl. dont beat yourself up. you are perfectly normal and sounds just like me. Some days I get so tired of trying and seeing no results...

I think being pissed off and "lost" along the way is part of the process. Like the other girls said... just focus on eating good food... but healthy food. Dont gain... and the mind set will come around for us again!

We just have to be patient... that is key. and "patient" is the part i have trouble with. I want it all done "now" too :D

Thanks for making me feel better Wheetsin!

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:cool:i need to make more/new goals i know but i dont know what i want... well i do but one of them is so freaking petty (i want to weigh less than my sister - i dunno how much she weighs but she's going up) ...

***sigh*** i just need the motivation / kick in the pants ??? to see it clearly.

i cant believe i had it and just lost it :D

Go for it and don't feel so bad ... sometimes petty works! ;)

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      Soooo I am coming to a realization
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      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
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      1. summerseeker

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        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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