Getting Scared

[arringtonc49 188]

I am having gastric sleeve surgery

Tomorrow. I am getting Scared.

I was going to change my mind but

When I think about my health issues;

The surgery would help.

I think the thought of change is what

I am afraid of. I don't want to fail.

Has anyone else felt this way?

[2-Liter 364]

I think everyone that has ever had this Surgery has felt this way, Heck I know I did. The Truth is you made a decision with a Rational mindset and to alter that decision out of fear will leave you with regret till the end of time. Your Health is Bigger than your fear so take a leap of Faith and improve your quality of Life. If you are having any doubts go to the Before and after photos and see how much Better your Life will look.

[arringtonc49 188]

Thank you for that encouragement. it help me feel better.

[Berry78 4,259]

JerseyJules got scared 2 years ago. Backed out of the surgery. Nothing improved, so he went back to the surgeon, and is now a little over a week out of surgery.

Stories like that keep me to it. I know if I back out, I'll end up coming back eventually! Might as well get on the other side!

Good luck! You'll do great!

[Paul Bahr 73]

This is exactly where I'm at and I've a couple weeks out (Mar 30 is cut day). It's the thought of it being a change, and a permanent one at that, that's got me tangled up. My thoughts go out into the future and all of the "what ifs". What if something comes up later on that I'll need my entire stomach for? I haven't got a clue what that could be, but it's something that runs through my head.

And then there's the fear that I'l be a failure at this, too. I got the band back in 2005 and failed with it. What's to say I'm not going to be a failure with this? With the band, I always knew it could simply be taken out whenever it needed to be. With the VSG, what's gone is gone and can't be replaced.

I'm a software developer and analyst so I'm naturally very "just the facts, ma'am". It drives me nuts sometimes.

[arringtonc49 188]

Well just like the response I received earlier; step out on faith. I am now feeling better also from response from another as to go get it over with.
If I don't do it now I will most likely
Be coming back to get it done.
I too know someone whom cancelled
At last minute and now wishes she should have had the surgery because
Her diets have failed.

[orionburn 1,023]

I will say the mental aspect to having WLS was much higher than I anticipated. In the final weeks leading up to my surgery I went through all the same second guessing. What if this, what if that. But I want to be able to pig out only on holidays and special occasions. I can control it if I just stay focused. I'm 40. Obviously my control hasn't worked so well since I've been overweight my entire life.

Recently I was watching a show and a guy was getting ready to go into rehab and stopped to call his dad making all the excuses of why he didn't need to go. He could control it, it's only once in a while he likes to party, blah blah blah. This forum was a big eye opener for me because I saw a lot of people asking the questions that I was thinking mentally - "Well after surgery how long until I can start having bad food X, Y, and Z again?" That make me realize I was looking at this the wrong way. If all I'm doing is looking at how to get around my new smaller stomach then why am I going to do this anyway? When I quit smoking years ago I thought there was no way life could go on without cigarettes. Quitting was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do but guess what...life went on just fine.

WLS is a tool. For me between being a binge eater and the mounting health problems I felt I was up against a wall. I was looking at surgery on my back but couldn't get it done because of my weight. My number one reason for getting WLS was because my sciatica was so bad and my quality of life was suffering horribly. It was really sad when I realized I was more worried about being able to pig out on Thanksgiving or a handful of other holidays instead of suffering in pain every single day like I was. What was more important? Still being able to go to an all you can eat Chinese buffet or likely have a heart attack in the next 10-15 years?

Failure was and still is my biggest concern. It's worrisome knowing people gain all the weight back. I've come to look at WLS as going to an AA meeting. Both are tools to help you improve your life. You can take in all the info in the world but if you fail to actually apply it to your life then chances are you won't succeed. For me knowing that I'm going to have to fight each day helped me prepare mentally for the changes. Some days are going to be easy-peasy, and others will be a challenge. When it comes down to it you have to do what is best for you. All I can say is you have to weigh out the pros and cons and do what's best.

I will say this - if you're concerned about not being able to eat half a pizza on your own versus being rid of long term ailments then that's probably a good place to start for some introspection.

Edited March 9, 2017 by orionburn

[Paul Bahr 73]

The head game is really something I'm still trying to get my head around, if that makes sense. I guess it's kinda like "if you wait to have kids until you have enough money, you'll never have kids".

I'm pretty miserable at 440 lbs. I always say "I came out at 10lbs 1oz and I've never looked back!".

• I was born a big baby
• Was the biggest throughout all of school
• Shopped in the "husky" department all of my youth
• Can only shop in the "Big & Tall" stores
• Dealt with all of the BS of being ridiculed for the size I was/am
• Constantly think "will that chair hold me?"
• Constantly reject going to events at places I can't check out first, like a theater, concert hall, sports venue...because what if I won't fit in the seat or I'll bulge over into the next guy's seat?
• Can't play catch with my kids anymore - my 14 y/o is a sport nut and would likely be some better if dad would do stuff with him but I can't stand that long
• Don't travel much because I despise having to buy a second seat on a wide-body plain for my wide-body rear end
• Deal daily with sciatica pain (since Aug of 2016 - it varies from day to day but it's still there to a certain degree -- biggest fear is that I'll need surgery to fix the problem but will be told I'm too fat to have the surgery!

I've definitely got some food issues to work through and I'm still not sure what's behind them.

I'm ready for a change, but the "devil on my shoulder" keeps yelling in my ear!

[arringtonc49 188]

Orionburn have you had surgery yet?
If so, how are things going?

[orionburn 1,023]

23 minutes ago, arringtonc49 said:

Orionburn have you had surgery yet?
If so, how are things going?

Yep! Yesterday was my 6 week anniversary. Had a rough start after surgery when my spleen decided to spring a leak on day #3. Put me in ICU for 2 days, but bounced back fairly quick. Was a fluke thing and nothing the doctor did wrong. It's one of those rare anomalies that can happen. Outside of that my recovery has gone well, and honestly if not for my stupid spleen episode it wasn't as bad as I thought.

Healthwise my sciatica has improved by leaps and bounds. While I still get some numbness and hip pain from time to time the nerve pain has almost vanished. Before I could only walk for about 5 minutes and then the pain would be horrible. My joints are doing much better and that's even without me being back on my arthritis meds yet. Despite the bumpy start I know I made the right decision. I'm down almost 35 pounds since surgery and it's made a world of difference to my health. Honestly if I had no health issues at all it would have been a harder decision to make on WLS, but given where I was at I felt it was my best option.

[PatientEleventyBillion 851]

13 minutes ago, orionburn said:

Yep! Yesterday was my 6 week anniversary. Had a rough start after surgery when my spleen decided to spring a leak on day #3. Put me in ICU for 2 days, but bounced back fairly quick. Was a fluke thing and nothing the doctor did wrong. It's one of those rare anomalies that can happen. Outside of that my recovery has gone well, and honestly if not for my stupid spleen episode it wasn't as bad as I thought.

Healthwise my sciatica has improved by leaps and bounds. While I still get some numbness and hip pain from time to time the nerve pain has almost vanished. Before I could only walk for about 5 minutes and then the pain would be horrible. My joints are doing much better and that's even without me being back on my arthritis meds yet. Despite the bumpy start I know I made the right decision. I'm down almost 35 pounds since surgery and it's made a world of difference to my health. Honestly if I had no health issues at all it would have been a harder decision to make on WLS, but given where I was at I felt it was my best option.

Awesome news.

The doctors confused my L5/S1 compression fracture for sciatica and wanted to do an epidural injection but I convinced them to just do facet joint injections on both sides of my back. Thank god for that too. Ablation next, if I need it. Like you, pain has subsided a lot with the dumping of weight, although it still occurs after more than a few mins of standing/walking.

Good luck on continuing your recovery,

Edited March 9, 2017 by PatientEleventyBillion

[arringtonc49 188]

That is GREAT!!!!

[gjb2017 71]

I am having gastric sleeve surgery
Tomorrow. I am getting Scared.
I was going to change my mind but
When I think about my health issues;
The surgery would help.
I think the thought of change is what
I am afraid of. I don't want to fail.
Has anyone else felt this way?

AbSolute lyrics! I'm not having vsg till July, and I've changed my mind scores of times!

[gjb2017 71]

I will say the mental aspect to having WLS was much higher than I anticipated. In the final weeks leading up to my surgery I went through all the same second guessing. What if this, what if that. But I want to be able to pig out only on holidays and special occasions. I can control it if I just stay focused. I'm 40. Obviously my control hasn't worked so well since I've been overweight my entire life.
Recently I was watching a show and a guy was getting ready to go into rehab and stopped to call his dad making all the excuses of why he didn't need to go. He could control it, it's only once in a while he likes to party, blah blah blah. This forum was a big eye opener for me because I saw a lot of people asking the questions that I was thinking mentally - "Well after surgery how long until I can start having bad food X, Y, and Z again?" That make me realize I was looking at this the wrong way. If all I'm doing is looking at how to get around my new smaller stomach then why am I going to do this anyway? When I quit smoking years ago I thought there was no way life could go on without cigarettes. Quitting was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do but guess what...life went on just fine.
WLS is a tool. For me between being a binge eater and the mounting health problems I felt I was up against a wall. I was looking at surgery on my back but couldn't get it done because of my weight. My number one reason for getting WLS was because my sciatica was so bad and my quality of life was suffering horribly. It was really sad when I realized I was more worried about being able to pig out on Thanksgiving or a handful of other holidays instead of suffering in pain every single day like I was. What was more important? Still being able to go to an all you can eat Chinese buffet or likely have a heart attack in the next 10-15 years?
Failure was and still is my biggest concern. It's worrisome knowing people gain all the weight back. I've come to look at WLS as going to an AA meeting. Both are tools to help you improve your life. You can take in all the info in the world but if you fail to actually apply it to your life then chances are you won't succeed. For me knowing that I'm going to have to fight each day helped me prepare mentally for the changes. Some days are going to be easy-peasy, and others will be a challenge. When it comes down to it you have to do what is best for you. All I can say is you have to weigh out the pros and cons and do what's best.
I will say this - if you're concerned about not being able to eat half a pizza on your own versus being rid of long term ailments then that's probably a good place to start for some introspection. [emoji6]

Sciatica my problem too. My general help is not atrocious, lol, 335 lbs, but good heart, blood preasure, and no internal problems.

It was only after having my herniated disk taken care of that I realized that I was actually crushing myself to death. ☹

[orionburn 1,023]

7 minutes ago, gjb2017 said:

Sciatica my problem too. My general help is not atrocious, lol, 335 lbs, but good heart, blood preasure, and no internal problems.

It was only after having my herniated disk taken care of that I realized that I was actually crushing myself to death. ☹

My sciatica didn't start until about 4 years ago, but as I've slowly put weight on in the past years (crept back up to 350ish) the worse it got. Outside of my arthritis and the sciatica generally I was in good health. It just put a big speed bump to physical activity, and having a desk job on top of it wasn't a good combo. I know I'm not ever going to be 100% because the back issue is degenerative, but if it pushes off back surgery for 10-15 years then I'll take it.