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Hi, I'm Cassi. It has taken me several years to make this decision. I previously felt like I was "giving up" or somehow "cheating" if I chose to do bariatric surgery. I felt like I needed to learn the lessons I needed to learn by working through this on my own. Now I've come to a point where I feel like the lesson I need to learn is that I don't have to do everything on my own. It's okay to ask for help. It's okay to NEED help. For so long I attached a lot of "moral rightness/wrongness" to choosing the surgery, as if losing weight the "old-fashioned way", i.e. diet and exercise, meant I was somehow stronger, better, etc. I have come to see it as a tool, a way of helping with the hunger part of the equation while I stay committed to the diet and exercise parts.

I went to my PCP on Sept 6, 2007 with my decision to do the lap-band, which she whole-heartedly supported. From there, insurance had to approve the referral to a bariatric surgeon. They initially denied it, but then reversed their decision a few days later based on additional notes from PCP (showing consistent weight loss attempts). I have been to the requisite seminar, have scheduled the psych eval, and have scheduled the initial consultation with the surgeon, set for Oct 19, 2007. I'm hopeful that an approval to have a surg. consult. will mean that they will approve the actual procedure. It doesn't necessarily meant that, of course, but I can still hope, yes?

Right now I'm at the stage of practicing eating with a lap-band--not the microscopic portion sizes, of course, but chewing thoroughly, eating slowly, avoiding "cheat" foods like ice cream, etc.

My concerns are primarily centered around social issues. How/what do I tell people who say, "Wow, you look great!"? What is life at a Thanksgiving family get-together like? How do I deal with those who think I took the easy way out (believe me, I understand their mindset--I've been there). I just don't want to feel like I have to "explain myself" for the rest of my life.

Anyway, sorry to get long-winded. I tend to do that. :-)

I'm looking forward to getting to know many of you.

Cassi

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My concerns are primarily centered around social issues. How/what do I tell people who say, "Wow, you look great!"? What is life at a Thanksgiving family get-together like? How do I deal with those who think I took the easy way out (believe me, I understand their mindset--I've been there). I just don't want to feel like I have to "explain myself" for the rest of my life.

Anyway, sorry to get long-winded. I tend to do that. :-)

I'm looking forward to getting to know many of you.

Cassi

Hi Cassi

I have recently been banded ( 6 days ago) and have not told many people in fact my immediate family and two friends are all. There are many like me but there are also many that have no problems telling people.

I have a family reunion at Christmas time that will involve eating and drinking and at present do not plan to let the rest of my family know. My plan is quiet simply eat slowly and little and if any one makes comments about how little I eat I will say that that is my new diet plan just to eat slowly enjoy the taste of food and say thats how I have lost the weight so far. If for some reason I change my mind I will.

It is my decision who I tell and when I tell. From all I have read, learnt from others the whole process is not an easy way out. We still have to make the correct food choices exercise, the band is a tool that will help us it does not make us thin we have to do the work.

Re comments take them the same way you would if you had lost weight and not been banded. Just say "Thank you I do feel great." or "Yeah I have lost isn't it great"

Sorry I also suffer long windedness.

Take care and good luck

Jane

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Good advice! I agree that eating s-l-o-w-l-y will help ease the social eating awkwardness. If you're finished at about the same time as everyone else, then it shouldn't be a big deal, right? I figure it will be good incentive to make social gatherings more about the people than the food.< /p>

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Hi, I'm Wendy. I had banding done two days ago..9/26. I'm still trying to get used to the way to feed yourself and the feel of food going down. I'm really excited to start this journey of weight loss, not knowing what to expect and how the fills will change my eating later. This website is awesome! I have been in here reading the stories on everything that can happen and I can see that I will be spending a lot of time in here looking for helpful tips. :ranger: Thanks to everyone for being here for others like myself who need help starting out. :help:

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Welcome to the group. I got my band 8/30 and am loving it. Only a few of my closest friends know what I have done, but quite a few people have commented on the loss so far. I just tell them that walking, stopping sodas and eating better quality food ( no more drive-thru's) really works. So far so ood. Good luck with your journey....Dave

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Cassi,

You only tell those people you want to tell. If someone comments on how much weight you have lost, all you have to say is Thanks. If they ask how, tell them through hard work and will power. If someone suggests you are cheating, ask them if using an alarm clock to wake you in the morning is cheating because that is all the band is - an alarm clock to tell you it's time to stop eating.

Congratulations on your decision. I'm not banded yet but I am hoping to be soon. I am from Australia and it never ceases to amaze me how much trouble Americans and Canadians have in getting approval for their surgery. Here, if we have private insurance and the surgeon says we need the surgery our insurance pays - no debates, no questions asked. As long as you have been a member for 12 months and you have sufficient coverage the decision is not theirs to make.

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Hi, I'm Cassi. It has taken me several years to make this decision. I previously felt like I was "giving up" or somehow "cheating" if I chose to do bariatric surgery. I felt like I needed to learn the lessons I needed to learn by working through this on my own. Now I've come to a point where I feel like the lesson I need to learn is that I don't have to do everything on my own. It's okay to ask for help. It's okay to NEED help. For so long I attached a lot of "moral rightness/wrongness" to choosing the surgery, as if losing weight the "old-fashioned way", i.e. diet and exercise, meant I was somehow stronger, better, etc. I have come to see it as a tool, a way of helping with the hunger part of the equation while I stay committed to the diet and exercise parts.

I went to my PCP on Sept 6, 2007 with my decision to do the lap-band, which she whole-heartedly supported. From there, insurance had to approve the referral to a bariatric surgeon. They initially denied it, but then reversed their decision a few days later based on additional notes from PCP (showing consistent weight loss attempts). I have been to the requisite seminar, have scheduled the psych eval, and have scheduled the initial consultation with the surgeon, set for Oct 19, 2007. I'm hopeful that an approval to have a surg. consult. will mean that they will approve the actual procedure. It doesn't necessarily meant that, of course, but I can still hope, yes?

Right now I'm at the stage of practicing eating with a lap-band--not the microscopic portion sizes, of course, but chewing thoroughly, eating slowly, avoiding "cheat" foods like ice cream, etc.

My concerns are primarily centered around social issues. How/what do I tell people who say, "Wow, you look great!"? What is life at a Thanksgiving family get-together like? How do I deal with those who think I took the easy way out (believe me, I understand their mindset--I've been there). I just don't want to feel like I have to "explain myself" for the rest of my life.

Anyway, sorry to get long-winded. I tend to do that. :-)

I'm looking forward to getting to know many of you.

Cassi

Hi Cassi! Welcome!

I recommend NOT telling people that you are having surgery.

And if anyone tells you weight loss surgery is taking the easy way out, stare at them a moment and say this:

"Well, you know, only an IDIOT would take the HARD WAY OUT!"

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    • Doughgurl

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    • Doughgurl

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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