Confession time! Please judge me, I need it.

[Justweight 33]

@Marissa.Ann.C

[Soyounique 35]

On 3/2/2017 at 6:10 PM, Justweight said:

Okay! Here it goes.

I had surgery on the 17th of Feb. Today marks 2 weeks post op. Surgery went well. Spent 3 days and 2 nights in the hospital. The 1st day I accidentally ate an orange and almost died. The 1st week I did well. Protein shake and Oikos yogurts and pain pills. The doctor told me to increase my Water intake but I just can't drink two bottles a day. This week I felt hungry. I was starving. The Protein  shakes weren't cutting it. I decided to start soft food earlier. He's the confession. I would chew the food and spit it out. I had some meatballs, and fish, and food I know I shouldn't be eating. I told myself that because I'm not actually swallowing it then I should be fine. Today I feel horrible. I know that habit is a bad one and I should stop before it gets out of hand. I decided to start this week over and go back to full liquids. Today I restocked on Protein, yogurt, Jello and Water. I'm going to do it the right way this time.

OMG!

You're telling my story... Week one I couldn't take it either.. I would chew food and spit it out.. I'm sorry if this was the wrong approach but it got me thru!

I found that after tasting and chewing, I was satisfied! I didn't even want to swallow it.. Just needed to taste and chew ... So I feel your pain.. You're not in this alone.. This is the first time for most of us.. Don't beat your self up, just learn whatever lessons you can along the way ?

[Jill_Me 100]

Also, there are no "buts" with hydration. You can drink the Water. My nutritionist told us to set a timer for every 15 min and drink a 2 oz little cup of water every 15 (or Protein shake) and always more than 64oz water per day. When I don't focus on hydration goals I end up feeling like total crap. You got this surgery. Do what you need to do to be well and don't make excuses.

[Justweight 33]

@Soyounique thank you for support and reassuring me I'm not alone. I love this app but it feels like some people on here forget we are human and it's going to take time to let go of bad habits. I was accused of faking my experiences and just wanting attention. I'm being transparent. I'm being opened. I do it so people like you can help me through. I appreciate you. For the other people that were born perfect and obviously didn't need the surgery because they ate perfectly their entire life please exit and find an app for perfect people. [emoji1610]

[Pam_2-06-2017 375]

@Justweight If you've been accused of faking your experience then you understand that those people are faking their support and don't deserve to be heard. I am almost 4 weeks post op. I never had head hunger although if you call some slight regret head hunger then maybe I did for a day or so. I struggle with no hunger at all so getting in my Protein and Water are really tough for me. I did the taste and spit 1 week after surgery because I was making a new recipe and didn't want to serve something gross to my family. It tasted like cardboard to me anyway so I had my husband try it.

It is not too late and you haven't sabotaged yourself. When taste and spit enters your mind think about your committed self right before surgery, the vision of yourself healthy, or just walk away from the food and journal or meditate. Anything to move your mind back to its healthy state because taste and spit is not a healthy state. When you move beyond soft foods and are given the green light to eat possible failure is eminent. These weeks before full diet phase are designed to change the relationship you have with food not just to heal your tummy. Taste and spit is not a healthy relationship.

Good luck. Reading these messages boards is a great way to distract yourself from slipping.

Take care.

[Justweight 33]

@Justweight If you've been accused of faking your experience then you understand that those people are faking their support and don't deserve to be heard. I am almost 4 weeks post op. I never had head hunger although if you call some slight regret head hunger then maybe I did for a day or so. I struggle with no hunger at all so getting in my Protein and Water are really tough for me. I did the taste and spit 1 week after surgery because I was making a new recipe and didn't want to serve something gross to my family. It tasted like cardboard to me anyway so I had my husband try it.

It is not too late and you haven't sabotaged yourself. When taste and spit enters your mind think about your committed self right before surgery, the vision of yourself healthy, or just walk away from the food and journal or meditate. Anything to move your mind back to its healthy state because taste and spit is not a healthy state. When you move beyond soft foods and are given the green light to eat possible failure is eminent. These weeks before full diet phase are designed to change the relationship you have with food not just to heal your tummy. Taste and spit is not a healthy relationship.

Good luck. Reading these messages boards is a great way to distract yourself from slipping.

Take care.

You are amazing. Thanks for your kind words. I'm doing better. I'm down 9 pounds in 2 weeks despite me hiccups so that was a little encouragement to keep pushing. My doctor has given me the ok to start light aerobics so I'm excited to start sweating.

[CocoNina 210]

You're brave for sharing your story & you should be proud of yourself for acknowledging what you're doing isn't right but you're willing to make it right. Yes, we are all human & we got this surgery because food is so good, it's hard to resist. I can't believe I made it through the 2-week pre-op liquids only which I think is worse than after surgery diet.

I got my surgery 2 days before you. My sense of smell has gone up because food smells so good. I haven't done what you did & am surprisingly following my diet. The thing with food now is, I could barely consume my 60 grams of Protein & I'm barely getting my required 48 fl oz of liquid. My stomach gets that full feeling I never felt before. I don't want to throw up or gag because it hurts my stomach. There are times I'm cranky because I miss food, but then I look at how much I lost so far in this short amount of time (22 lbs since surgery) & tell myself it's worth it, I would never lose 22 lbs on my own. Our minds are not in-sync with our bodies yet, but eventually it will be. I look at blogs that share recipes of healthier alternatives of foods I love & it gets me excited. So, this liquid phase won't last forever. Good luck to you. Don't be ashamed. Keep on going & look at your results to motivate you.


Height 5'0"
Weight for WLS consultation: 216 lbs.
Surgery date: 2/13/17
Goal: - 71 lbs for healthy BMI (about 145 lbs).
Current weight: 188 lbs
My profile picture is not me. It's my "FitSpiration" body.

[hermione53 157]

I also commend you for being honest about what you've been doing and asking for support. I am one of the lucky ones who felt no hunger in the weeks after sleeve surgery (even though it was Christmas!) I do remember way back when I first got my first lap band (this was about 17 years ago), it must have been a few weeks out and I kind of flipped out and ate potato chips, cake, and one of those small microwavable Breakfast burritos. It hurt like hell and I threw it all up. I was so disappointed in myself, but I kept wanting more! It was definitely self-sabotage. Evenutally I got to know what the band could handle so threw up much less, but this whole not taking care of myself thing has been a lifelong struggle.

Even with the sleeve (I'm 11 weeks out) my old habits sometimes rear their ugly heads. Last week for about three nights in a row I ate a bunch of Peanut Butter and string cheese. I'd done so well all of those days and worked out like a fiend. I Just got into a "I NEED TO EAT" zone. I eventually ate all of the string cheese and threw out the peanut butter so things are better, but it made me decide to join a six-week mindful eating class. I'm hoping it will help me notice when I'm most vulnerable to the old ways of eating. I'm also in individual and group therapy, which helps a lot.

I hope that you'll not beat yourself up but rather come to honor the beautiful person that you are. You deserve to be compassionate and caring with your body. You can do this!