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I'm so sorry. My surgery is scheduled for Jan 17th. I haven't even had the surgery and my husband is already threatening divorce. Like what the heck?? I love this man more than life itself but hes convinced I will find someone new. Its making me second guess my decision to have the surgery.

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That is my surgery date too! TWINS ???? Please don't back out because of him. You have to do this for you. I promise, there are so many things I didn't do because of my husband and I kick myself every day because of it. I lost every friend I had. I allowed him to push my sister away. He controlled everything and everyone in my life. And one day I woke up and said no more. I'm stronger than this.

You owe this to yourself. It's the beginning of your new life!

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I can understand the feeling. My husband walked out 5 months ago today with out any warning. I was at work and got a text that he moved out. My wedding anniversary is next week and the divorce will be final in January. I put on my happy face most of the time but really feel like I'm falling apart inside still. Just keep trying to stay focused on the positive and take it day at a time. That's all any of us can do.

Im so sorry you are going through that. That's such a chicken shit way to leave.

Even though I left my husband it still hurts like hell because I still very much love him. But my safety and sanity was at risk. The day i left him i cut off all contact.

Maybe some things that help me will help you. First off, I'm alone. No friends, no job, no family. So that really sucks. I'm in a new state and feel pretty isolated. So I sit with my thoughts all day. I have positive affirmations on post it notes stuck on my bathroom mirror. I say them out loud as many times as I need to every day. I try and stay busy in my house and focus on things that make me happy. But you have to be careful that you are not just stuffing your feeling. You have to allow yourself to feel it and walk through it. One of my affirmations are. I will feel grief but I will not wallow in it.

I got a puppy. He is a great distraction.

On days that I just can't breathe I tell myself, one day all this hurt will be gone and I will feel normal again. I read everything about toxic relationships that I can get my hands on and I pray ALOT!

One day at a time and when that seems too much just one hour at a time.

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I believe it is related to the surgery!

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I haven't had surgery yet.

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I'm so flippen screwed! I have to gain weight or I'll never get this surgery. I know it sounds sooooo stupid. I know. But I weighed myself this evening. I've dropped another 5 pounds. Not on purpose. I swear I've never dropped weight like this in my life. It's just all this stress. I know eventually it will come back. I'm a month away from surgery. I can't let this stress beat me. I can hardly eat though. I need to put on some weight.

My surgeons nurse is concerned that my final weight before surgery will cause the insurance company to not pay for the surgery. So she told me to put on some weight before my pre op diet. Does that mean they cancel it right then and there or they bill me after its done? My NUT told me at my last appointment that my weight that day would be the last time the insurance looked at it.

I'm desperate! Please advise!

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Every insurance is different in requirements. I would suggest that you talk to the insurance company and find out exactly what they use for approval. Have them email it to you so you have it in writing.

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