The Ongoing Saga of my Dad & my Surgery

[Anna Nim 196]

I know I have posted a bit about my Dad. I am STILL set on surgery tomorrow...but this is what I have to deal with!

Love him, but a LEMMING!!!

​

The only real reason to have this surgery is to change your continuous hunger level....and that isn't guaranteed.

Wacking off your stomach doesn't do much to your bodies ability to gain or loose weight.

Slicing your self open and destroying your stomach sets you up for a possible lifetime of medical problems and pain, all for the promise of weight loss which I do believe will occur for you but at a dear cost.

To be successful your meals will consist of a bland diet of about 4 tablespoons per meal.

You don't need to cut out your stomach to do that one!!

Nausea and indigestion could be your daily experience. You will likely have to maintain a life time of nutrition supplements and you will require continuous medical monitoring. You don't like taking supplements now, so if you will have to do it, do it now without the surgery!

Your primary weight loss will occur over the first two years but the adverse consequences of this surgery could build with time and haunt you like a plague forever.

Don't do this thing. I know you have not given a balanced blood analysis monitored supplement regime to suppress your hunger and to assist you in a weight loss program a chance.

Don't butcher your self when there are far safer alternatives.

This is not the easy path that you think it is. It is one that you will be sorry for taking and it is one that you will not be able to end once begun.

The science of weight loss is changing radically nearly daily.

Apply that extremely intelligent brain of yours to weight loss as you have to other challenges. In the future, stomach sleeve surgery will be considered as brutally barbaric to have done as RK eye surgery is considered today. That (erroneously), I thought well researched decision, severely unalterably impacts my life every day that I am alive.

It was a big mistake that only severely showed up in the past ten years but nothing even close to like sleeve surgery could end up being for you.

Please listen to me: I am right about this.. Don't do it my daughter, don't do it.

But remember, if you are locked into this thing and absolutely have to like a Lemming going towards a cliff; no matter what you do, you will always be my princess and I will always be your dad and I will always be there for you.

[theantichick 2,204]

Headdesk.

He doesn't have the facts. The surgery seems to for some reason give us a do-over related to our set point. Science doesn't know why yet, but that is the current evidence. I have a post on my blog that's linked in my sig called the Easy Way Out. I don't have the citations for my evidence, but I'm a post-grad nurse and everything I talk about is from medical and scientific literature. If it will help, forward it to him.

You may have to just quit responding to his input about the surgery and let the results speak for themselves.

My Dad (also an engineer) just can't understand why I had to have the surgery, after all it's just a question of willpower and deciding to eat the right things. He just doesn't get that willpower doesn't work. I explained the medical reasons and what we know so far about the science behind the surgery and then just quit discussing it with him. I know he was worried, and it is out of love for me. He got to see me 62# down at Thanksgiving and more active than I've been in years. That's the proof in the pudding.

Hugs, and good luck! It'll all work out.

[Vinasu 621]

Well, he's cherry picking the things he wants to see. The fact is, it's a very safe surgery. Tablespoons of bland foods lasts a month...and they weren't particularly bland. Willpower doesn't work.

Look at him, nod, and then do your thing.

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[MissJDVSG 129]

Headdesk is correct!

It's clear that your dad loves you and is coming from a place of love.

Maybe he knew someone who had the surgery and had some crazy complication? That's usually what I have heard about from people (who then act like experts) about WLS.

If your surgery is tomorrow, at least you are toward the end of his pleading. Unless of course, he decides to continue to talk about how you shouldn't have done this after surgery?

That might be one thing to address with him, that you know his opinion but now hat you've had the surgery, you need him to be 110% supportive and not bring up his personal opinions about doubts.

You're not a lemming. Your an adult making an informed decision with which your dad disagrees. You're allowed to put yourself and your health first.

Good luck with your surgery! All will be well!

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[Raymia 565]

Wow!!!! He sounds just like my dad... Well that's why I didn't tell him : 0/ I just told my mom (I meant to make a post about it but anyway) I'll leave it to her to tell my dad : ) I had to remind my mother and other relatives I'm not telling you this for your opinion, I'm just letting you know because this is Surgery... My mind was made up at the seminar : )

[Bufflehead 6,358]

"continuous medical monitoring . . . nutritional supplements . . . tablespoons of bland food"

He makes it sound like you are going to spend your life being trailed by a rolling IV bag, a team of medical professionals with clipboards, and someone to feed you eyedroppers full of Ensure and liquid vitamins on a schedule. Trust me, that is not my life and it won't be yours either. Good luck with your surgery, and your dad! Promise yourself that you will work extra hard just to prove him wrong

[laceemouse 631]

@@Anna Nim Do you live with your father? Do you live alone or with someone else? Honestly if you don't live with him just quit talking to him. Have the surgery and don't see him or spend time with him for a while. Tell him to leave you alone. That's what I would do.

[Montana Gal 448]

Keep your head up, stay positive and focused. You are doing what is best for you and you alone. I don't regret my surgery for even a minute. Good luck and best wishes for an uneventful recovery, you will do great!

[blizair09 3,250]

Like others have said, your life will not be like he is describing. Yes, it will suck for a few short weeks, but that is hardly forever.

It is so obvious that he loves you and wants the best for you, but I would put a little distance there until you have the surgery and get past the first few days post-op. As time goes on, he'll see that this was a good decision on your part. (The first few days do suck, so don't give him the opportunity to project this "I told you so" mentality over conditions that are merely temporary.)

Good luck tomorrow!

[Noneyo 171]

I have to say, I kind of love your dad and he's just trying to protect you but he is very wrong about this one. You will not only be fine but you will be awesome!

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[Travelher 915]

Agree with everyone. You will be fine. Parents can be extremely trying and always know which buttons to push. I will always remember my father telling me in university that I had to lose weight because employers won't hire fat people.

My mother was thrilled I was getting the surgery. This is because I can never be thin enough for her. I told her my goal was 170...she said.."oh that isn't thin enough. You have a small frame". I responded with "my doctor thinks that would be a perfect weight for me." Then she told me I eat too many fried foods and that is my problem..,because she would know this how? She lives in another country and sees me twice a year for a total of 6 days. Argh!!!

Parents....

[LittleBill 2,231]

@@Anna Nim I'd discount that entire thing, except for this last part right here...

"But remember, if you are locked into this thing and absolutely have to like a Lemming going towards a cliff; no matter what you do, you will always be my princess and I will always be your dad and I will always be there for you."

Let's hope he means it. It looks like seeing is the only way for him to believe.

[ella37 455]

Just remember he has good intentions. He is uninformed and truly thinks you're about to make a mistake so like any parent he's trying to talk you out of it.

Yes, the first few weeks suck. It will be small meals of bland foods. The good thing about the sleeve is that most of us can still eat a little of everything, it just helps control portions!

[jhemp85 106]

I know I have posted a bit about my Dad. I am STILL set on surgery tomorrow...but this is what I have to deal with!

Love him, but a LEMMING!!!

​The only real reason to have this surgery is to change your continuous hunger level....and that isn't guaranteed.

Wacking off your stomach doesn't do much to your bodies ability to gain or loose weight.

Slicing your self open and destroying your stomach sets you up for a possible lifetime of medical problems and pain, all for the promise of weight loss which I do believe will occur for you but at a dear cost.

To be successful your meals will consist of a bland diet of about 4 tablespoons per meal.

You don't need to cut out your stomach to do that one!!

Nausea and indigestion could be your daily experience. You will likely have to maintain a life time of nutrition supplements and you will require continuous medical monitoring. You don't like taking supplements now, so if you will have to do it, do it now without the surgery!

Your primary weight loss will occur over the first two years but the adverse consequences of this surgery could build with time and haunt you like a plague forever.

Don't do this thing. I know you have not given a balanced blood analysis monitored supplement regime to suppress your hunger and to assist you in a weight loss program a chance.

Don't butcher your self when there are far safer alternatives.

This is not the easy path that you think it is. It is one that you will be sorry for taking and it is one that you will not be able to end once begun.

The science of weight loss is changing radically nearly daily.

Apply that extremely intelligent brain of yours to weight loss as you have to other challenges. In the future, stomach sleeve surgery will be considered as brutally barbaric to have done as RK eye surgery is considered today. That (erroneously), I thought well researched decision, severely unalterably impacts my life every day that I am alive.

It was a big mistake that only severely showed up in the past ten years but nothing even close to like sleeve surgery could end up being for you.

Please listen to me: I am right about this.. Don't do it my daughter, don't do it.

But remember, if you are locked into this thing and absolutely have to like a Lemming going towards a cliff; no matter what you do, you will always be my princess and I will always be your dad and I will always be there for you.

My dad is kinda the same. He keeps asking me if I'm sure and sends different people to talk to me about it. Lol

[Anna Nim 196]

My dad is kinda the same. He keeps asking me if I'm sure and sends different people to talk to me about it. Lol

There is this Kesiha parody from the Key Of Awesome, I can't copy it here cause my computer is work locked down, but one line is the girl singing, "Oh crap not again, it's an intervention". Going in my head right now

I did the surgery. I am hurting and sipping and ready to not hurt so much, but overall everything went fine.