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Who asked you "Did you have weight loss surgery?"



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I'm 11 months out and 5 months in maintenance. At this point, I'm pretty much past all the questions about "How did you lose the weight?" I only told a few family members and had some issue with answering close friends in a less than truthful manner.

This morning (while riding my bike for an hour), I started recollecting the odd group of people who outright asked me "Did you have weight loss surgery?" Of the 200+ people I talked to about my weight loss, the only ones who asked such a bold and personal question were not people who I would consider close friends:

1. A local golf store manager.

2. The girl who cuts my hair.< /p>

3. My Pastor.

4. The former Cable Guy.

How about you? If you're incognito, has anyone strange asked you directly?

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Yes.

I work in a manufacturing plant staffed with 1,800 people.

I've been there since the plant was being constructed.

Folks at work know me well. They've seen me grow to my highest weight. They've seen me limping around with one injury or another over the years.

Since last October they've seen me lose weight, yet again....only this time the loss has been steady....and fast....and gone lower than with any other attempt.

They approach with wide ranging comments at least a couple times a week.

I've chosen to be 100% open about the wls and what it's has been like.

Some of them are very curious and have desires to have wls as well. I spend much more time and follow up with them later on to help answer any question I can and refer them to the areas Bariatric Center of Excellence.

Outside of coworkers, I've had similar conversations with family and neighbors.

IT's a positive aspect of wls....being able to share with others and hope either they or someone they are close with can benefit from this, too.

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I know much of my family suspects, though I haven't told anyone outside of my mother and sister and one aunt, and I know they will keep my secret as long as I want them too. However, another aunt has been snooping around asking "have you heard that Abby might have had weight loss surgery? Did she say anything about it?" and the only people who know just continue to feign ignorance, but she totally wants to know that her suspicions are correct. There's no way she could possibly know because the 3 who do know are completely loyal and trustworthy. I KNOW they didn't tell. I suspect if she found out she would probably try to diminish my achievement of losing over 240 pounds by saying that I took the "easy way out" or some such nonsense. There's a reason I told very, very few people, especially the ones in my family. In the meantime, until she has proof, it seems she's going to keep trying to ferret out the proof and pretend she's super proud of/happy for me while talking about me behind my back. Whatever dude! :P No one else in my life has been anything but proud of me and happy for me about my newfound health/happiness. Only family members.

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One random broad when I went to buy a bra last year. Only fat people ask if you have surgery I think. Naturally thin people believe diet and exercise work.

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Not me, since I haven't had my surgery yet, but this lady I was talking to at my handspinners guild told me she had WLS. This was only after the lady I was talking to before introduced me to her and then eventually walked away. She did not feel comfortable talking in front of a thin person who was never obese about her WLS. She tells these people that it's a special diet that is medically supervised (which is true), but never admits to them that she had an elective surgery to lose weight. She told me that these thin-never-fat-before people think WLS is done for cosmetic reasons, so it's just easier to lie by omittion. She felt more comfortable telling overweight and obese people about her WLS because they are more likely to understand her reasons for doing so.

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Not me, I was too damn excited to have it and told everyone that I know there was no secrets here.

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I have not told anyone other than my SO, mother and sister. I will though - including people at work. I've worked there for 20 years and it will be quite obvious when I'm dropping weight quickly (hopefully it's quick anyway) that a diet didn't all of a sudden work. I honestly don't give 2 shits about what anyone has to say about it.

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@@KristenLe

I really wonder about people being curious and what makes them curious. I don't have co-workers so I have never had to deal with that aspect of WLS.

When I moved where I live now I moved here before surgery, so these people knew me as fat only. I had surgery started walking, got a dog and walked even more. I walked all the time in my apt complex, rainy days, freezing cold. With weights on, multiple times a day. None of the people that live here that have seen me drop weight "rapidly" have asked me a lot of questions about it. They just say "Looking good" "The hard work is paying off" I have literally lost a whole entire person in weight since I moved here, and no one questions it. Even the people that know me, and don't know I had surgery have never questioned it. My eating habits are totally different and my activity level while high before is through the roof now. People that are my friends on fitbit etc, see that I walk 25,000 steps a lot of days. My weight loss doesn't seem magical to people, they attribute it to a lifestyle change.

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Mostly the people that ask about it are obese themselves and are usually themselves considering or curious about it. I have been very open with my family so my supporters are great and my bitchy sister n law is waiting for me to slip up as usual. I love to disappoint her, and she hates that my father N law is always telling me how pretty I look. I think that comes from him being shocked at how different I look.

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@@OutsideMatchInside I think it's more nosey than curious. I have "dieted" at work but never lost any noticeable weight. I work in social services/healthcare with 95% women - maybe that's got something to do with it. You are lucky not having to deal with coworkers. I'd much rather work with dogs! ????

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So I told close members of my family. We do holidays, birthdays and vacays together. We are a very close knit and supportive family so it was not an option to NOT tell them. I waited until 2 weeks before surgery but my mom and hubby knew all along. I told my mother in law 1 month post op. She's very worrysome and I waited until I was in the clear for her sake.

I told 2 very trustworthy people at my job. I was only supposed to be out for 2 weeks. I told my colleagues I was taking 2 weeks off in July to spend with family. Well my supervisor who thought I was having fibroid surgery, while I was off asked if anyone had heard from me and knew how I was doing. They were all shocked because they didn't even know I was having any sort of procedure. One of my co workers (who I told) called me to give me the heads up that this had happened.

I felt bad because although it's my business, it put me in a very awkward position when I returned because everyone is like what happened! are you ok? we were worried how are you feeling??? They sent me a get well card, and a edible arrangements and I just felt awful. My colleagues have been very open with me about things that have gone on with them or their family and I felt bad not telling them but this was private for me. I did not feel comfortable discussing it with everyone. So I'm the girl who went on medical leave and had some sort of procedure that was supposed to be hush hush and all according to the "Water cooler gossip".

I get enough attention. I don't need them looking at me MORE to see if Im losing, or if I'm eating, or how much I'm eating. No one has mentioned anything yet but Im sure as I get closer to 50-60 lbs lost-- They will.

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I have told family and close friends. I've only told a few co-workers, for me its a bit embarrassing and its no one's business but my own. Its a personal decision and a significant one to make that one does not make lightly. There are serious consequences if things go badly.

Now thinking if someone asked me if I had surgery would I tell the truth, I would. What's done is done.

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Cervidae, don't let ANYONE ever say, we took the easy way out. .nope, no way, not on your life. You try living with the head games, the street of. .what did I do, the freakin liquid diet, the nausea, the pain. ..yeah, that's NOT the easy way out. We did what was best for us to save ourselves. You've done a great job, congratulations.

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-G920A using the BariatricPal App

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