What’s the Most Awkward Part of WLS?

[Alex Brecher 10,498]

Weight loss surgery can lead to a lot of great things, but there is a lot of potential for some awkward situations. You might feel uncomfortable telling your family about your decision, or you may feel awkward stepping into the gym for the first time in years or even the first time ever.

The awkward moments may come as you lose weight, with comments ranging from “You haven’t lost much, have you?” and “How are you losing so much weight,” to “You don’t look healthy” or “You’re not going to keep it off.”

There can also be awkward family moments when a relative you haven’t seen in a while sees your new appearance, or you go out to dinner and your friends are surprised to see you steer clear of old favorites – or worse, you need to leave the table to hit the bathroom.

So, what have been some of your most awkward moments related to WLS? Can you laugh at them now, or are they still too raw or too embarrassing?

[Cervidae 2,389]

Thankfully, most of my "moments" have been from well-meaning family and friends who just said or did something they didn't realize would be humiliating for me. Earlier this year, my boyfriend's mother, who has always been kind and supportive of me, said "you look great! I mean... you were huge before! HUGE." I know she meant to just convey her shock at how different I looked and how impressed she was at the change, but she said that in front of three other people and everyone sort of looked away, embarrassed even though she never realized that she had said something that bothered me. Still, I know she meant well and she's been so proud and supportive of me, so I try to remember these things when she says something crazy like that.

Then last week, I wore a one piece bathing suit without a skirt to the Y for the first time in... maybe 15 years. Everyone at the pool could see my copious extra thigh skin, and of course my arm flappies (as I call them), but I didn't have any other suit that fit me. I was super embarrassed at first but then the only people who recognized me were nothing but completely overjoyed and proud of me, as I've lost maybe 40 pounds since I last saw them. So I think I'm MUCH more cognizant of it than others are.

[SweetPeas 117]

There are a few people at work who frequently say "you're getting too skinny" or "you're losing too much weight." It's a bit intrusive as I am for the most part a private type of person and wouldn't dream of making such bold comments about another person's appearance. More on the embarrassment end of the spectrum is having to walk away from someone mid-conversation because you just know part of your dinner isn't staying down.

[Cervidae 2,389]

Oh! I also dropped my pants once in Walmart... they were on one moment and on the floor around my knees the next. I was there to get smaller pants/leggings, and I was just a bit late I suppose. Luckily, only my boyfriend saw and I was in the small isle's in the women's section, so I was pretty covered.

[KristenLe 5,979]

Oh! I also dropped my pants once in Walmart... they were on one moment and on the floor around my knees the next. I was there to get smaller pants/leggings, and I was just a bit late I suppose.[emoji14]Luckily, only my boyfriend saw and I was in the small isle's in the women's section, so I was pretty covered.

Lol... that's too funny!

[JustWatchMe 7,117]

People who go on and on about how much you've lost in front of other people who never knew you fat.

JustWatchMe

[NewNewMe 277]

I get people who just keep going on about how "skinny" I am and then keep asking me if I see how "fat" they are getting. It makes me very uncomfortable. Especially since I am not "skinny" and they have never been fat. It is nice to say they notice my loss but once is enough and they don't need to rub in how skinny they are by saying they are getting so "fat".

[melbell2222 244]

I think it's awkward when I tell ppl I'm getting gastric bypass and they say I'm not that big!!! Ummm I can't fit rides IM BIG!! But the awkward person I'd run into after I lose weight would have to be my aunt for sure!!!! I'll see her next spring bc she is not on my good side now

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[CNOEL3 117]

My cousin is still a bit shocked when I tell her how much I weighed at my highest and even on the day of surgery. She always says "No way, you must by lying, I never saw you as being THAT big!". She is just trying to make me feel better, and I'm not mad at her, I guess some people just don't see the people they love as big as we really are/were. Shes very supportive of my VSG and she even drove me to the hospital last week for my surgery.

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[Sophie74656 1,572]

For me there is awkwardness about the skin

But mainly it's thinking about how big I was before, how did I let myself get to that point, and seeing how mich damage it did to my body. It's a horrible feeling knowing that you have lost almost 200lbs and are still obese.

[erp 2,016]

This one I just don't have words for; I hope it make sense. Now that I have lost weight people are much more open about their weight biases. I have a coworker who keeps remarking how "happy" my husband must be now that I am thinner-- uh, he and I didn't know he was "unhappy" before. In fact he misses some parts of plumper me (butt/boobs). I was over 200lbs when I met my husband. Another person shared snide remarks with me about people who have "let themselves go and how unrecognized able they are". Both of these people knew me at my heaviest and now at my lightest.

Confronting weight bias post WLS has been the most awkward thing for me, I feel unprepared to address it.

[VSGAnn2014 12,992]

These days I'm usually the slimmest or one of the slimmest persons in groups of women. I'm starting to get comments about being "so slim." This happens not only with people I knew when I was heavy, but also with those who've only known me as a slim person.

To be honest, a few times their comments have led me to wonder if I've lost too much weight.

Usually, these comments aren't made by women who are obese, but are overweight.

In most instances, I don't think it's jealousy, but people who make socially inappropriate comments.

I guess it's going to take longer than two years for me to get accustomed to being the skinny one.

[mistycal 81]

Sometimes my friends will exclaim how skinny I am now, and I still have about 40-45 to go, sometimes I like to watch the people around them looking for who their talking about lol

[heather5565 959]

People who go on and on about how much you've lost in front of other people who never knew you fat.

JustWatchMe

This happened to me just today.

A friend I used to work with on another ward said out loud (very loudly) "Omg I swear you're even skinnier than when I saw you last." (Which was like 3 days before)

And then she kept going on and on that I need to eat more and stop being so skinny.

Other people were standing around that I didn't know and then of course they started asking questions.

I didn't want to explain anything with complete strangers let alone why I'm "so skinny" now.

Which btw - I'm not skinny.

I'm smaller but definitely not skinny!

It was so awkward!

[hdw85 48]

My first day back to work I was in the break room for lunch, and I am on puréed foods. Well one co worker asks if anyone wanted some cucumber, To which I replied I couldn't have that yet. She knew I was off from work bc I had surgery but didn't know what I was doing. So she asks and I told her gastric bypass.. She immediately says, " omg I hope you have good luck with that, I know people that have almost died bc their electrolytes were too low". So I had only had my surgery about 2 weeks before that. I really didn't know what to say back to that. I just said well I'll try my best to do all the right things. It was so awkward and there was 2 others sitting there looking appalled that she said that. Ugh, people!

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