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Did you or didn't you tell those around you about your lap band surgery? I am leaning on NOT telling anyone but my husband. The reason is because my in-laws are very judgemental on what we spend our money on and I know that they think I am taking the easy way out. For not telling my family, I know that there will probably be some jealousy issues. Any input as to why or why not, would be greatly appreciated!

Thanks!!

Brandy

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I have told on a "need to know" basis

Of course my wonderful husband who is supporting me 200%

My boss so I could get my sick days - and he has to keep it to himself

My best girlfriend of 30 years who is also a wonderful support

No parents on either side - no sibs either - no neighbors or casual friends

This to me is a very personal and private decision and one that I made without all these people - so why tell them

Anyway - just me - counting the time until next Tues when I get my band:whoo:

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I think in deciding who to tell you need to think about a couple of things. One, how much do what those around you say affect how you feel and what you do? The other is what are those around you likely to say?

In my case, I knew I was doing the right thing and that what anyone thought else(outside of my doctors and DH) didn't matter. I also knew that most people would be supportive. So I told everyone. The only time I've regretted it is when I've been platued, and have to face those "So, how much have you lost now" questions.

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I've told some and not others too. DH knows of coarse but NONE of his family. Some of my family and a few close friends. The reason I don't want his family to know is because none of them have the slightest clue about what it is like to struggle with a weight problem and I didn't figure they would really understand. I think in maybe about 6/8 months from now when there is noticable weight loss (I hope) I will probably be telling everyone but until then, there is really no point.

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Initially only DH and MY parents knew. Since I've told five friends. One has the band, one wants the band, one has been there through thick and thin, the other two are a couple who saw the scars and asked (and are VERY dear, wonderful friends who have recently grown close to DH and I).

I have no plans to tell anyone else. I wouldn't normally have told that many folks but it just happened. I don't want folks at work looking at me and policing my weight loss or my food. My boss only knows I had a little personal surgery done. That's all any employer needs to know. Heck, they don't really need to know even that much.

I wish you luck and I'm glad I haven't shared my decisions with many folks. For me it is not about whether I care or not if people know, it's just my decision and I don't think I need to share it with everyone. I wouldn't shout it from the rooftops if I had carpal tunnel surgery or any other surgery, why should I shout this? But if you want to, then goodonya! It's a total personal decision.

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Did you or didn't you tell those around you about your lap band surgery? I am leaning on NOT telling anyone but my husband. The reason is because my in-laws are very judgemental on what we spend our money on and I know that they think I am taking the easy way out. For not telling my family, I know that there will probably be some jealousy issues. Any input as to why or why not, would be greatly appreciated!

Thanks!!

Brandy

"Should I tell my family and friends?" It's up to you. In an ideal world, everyone would love you and support your decision to have life-saving surgery. But this is the REAL WORLD, where some people just can't keep themselves from making nasty, hurtful, ignorant and insensitive comments to people. If you don't want those comments, or are not strong enough to NOT CARE what other people think, DON'T TELL THEM!

ONE MORE THING.....

Of COURSE I took THE EASY WAY OUT.... because only an IDIOT would take THE HARD WAY OUT!!! ;)

(Remember that for whenever some idiot says you took the easy way out!)

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I wish you luck and I'm glad I haven't shared my decisions with many folks. For me it is not about whether I care or not if people know, it's just my decision and I don't think I need to share it with everyone. I wouldn't shout it from the rooftops if I had carpal tunnel surgery or any other surgery, why should I shout this? But if you want to, then goodonya! It's a total personal decision.

I totally agree with you aboug the fact it's a personal decision, and there isn't a "good" or "bad", "right" or "wrong" one!

One reason I think I'm pretty open about it is that we heard about banding first from an aunt. At the time DH was thinking about doing a bypass, because it's all we'd heard about. And since we've been banded, other people we know have taken steps to be banded based in part at least on our experiences.

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I told DH and family before surgery. But, since then I've been so happy with my results and weight loss is very noticable when people asked how I lost so much weight I feels like it's a lie to say "I just got self-control".

I've struggled with my weight for years and if you'd know earlier how wonder the lapband was from a friend, I maybe could have started the LB journery years sooner. If I can help one overweight person with my experience I'll be pleased. But, I also let people know it still takes a ton of hard work, LB IS A TOOL not a cure.

That's my two-cents-Connie

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Sheesh -- maybe I'm just TOO out there.

But I'd go on Larry King, Jay Leno and Oprah if it would help just one person.

Screw what people think. They're gonna think SUMTHIN' anyhow!

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But I'd go on Larry King, Jay Leno and Oprah if it would help just one person.

you know - that is the exact reason i post my pics on line and on my blog ... if i can help one person, it's worth it.

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Losingjusme-

The pictures and personal stories are what got me on the LB wagon.

Thanks to all who's stories have helped me on the road to a thinner-happier me.

Sorry if it's a little too sappy for Nana Rena.

Connie

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Well,

I want to start by saying that my children are IVF kids. We have male factor infertility and are very open about it because I think it could possibly help people. There is much less known (publicly) about male factor infertility...and so many stigmas with it.

All that being said, I have been relatively quiet regarding my lapband surgery. Everyone knows now, but I waited until my insurance approval came through before I told anyone. Because when you have a date, what are people going to really say to you?

And still, most people would not know but for my mother in law who decided everyone in the free world should know.

In the end, you need to do what you are comfortable with. Good luck!

Rain

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
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      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

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