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Body Dysmorphia

beachwalker4rny

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beachwalker4rny    95

beachwalker4rny
Posted

I'm not sure if I have this or not but when I look in the mirror I don't see that I have lost 71 lbs. all I see is how big my stomach, butt and thighs still are. I don't like being mentally negative like this. I am not at goal yet but I think this mental negativity is not productive. Anyone felt like this? How did you overcome these feelings? I should add that there are days that I can really see progress and it is encouraging. Today though I feel negative. :(

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BandtoSleevechick    171

BandtoSleevechick
Posted

71 pounds?! That's awesome and no joking matter!! Is there anyway you can focus on the way your clothes feel and look on you when you look in the mirror instead of what you don't like? i am the same way with my stomach.. i have some bumps and rolls lol and i zone into that spot. Never fails. Why not a walk or a quick video / gym time to get cardio in.. it always changes my moods from bad to good. One of my right now favorite quotes is The only motivation you need is staring back at you in the mirror. Best of luck!

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lifeofblair    308

lifeofblair
Posted

I'm the same way. I hope one day I can see myself the way others do, but I'm not there yet.

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James Marusek    5,244

James Marusek
Posted

One of the things that I did prior to surgery was take a before photograph. And then 6 months later I took an after photograph. I replicated the same pose.

Many people cannot see the changes after weight loss surgery. In my case I was the photographer in the family so I never appeared in the photographs. When I looked in the mirror all I saw was a straight on shot, so it was easy to overlook my weight. So my before and after photo was the best way to overcome my inability to see and appreciate my weight loss.

Operation.jpg

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Cervidae    2,389

Cervidae
Posted

I have days where I feel amazing and proud of myself, and can really appreciate just how far I've come. Then I have days when I look in the mirror and feel gross and ugly, and like I look just as bad as I did a year ago when I was 170 pounds heavier. I've seriously lost almost 200 pounds and I STILL feel this way sometimes, it's ridiculous. Our bodies change rapidly during this process, but our minds are going to take some time and effort. If only the surgery could fix our self-esteem like it fixes our appetites. :)

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beachwalker4rny    95

beachwalker4rny
Posted

I have days where I feel amazing and proud of myself, and can really appreciate just how far I've come. Then I have days when I look in the mirror and feel gross and ugly, and like I look just as bad as I did a year ago when I was 170 pounds heavier. I've seriously lost almost 200 pounds and I STILL feel this way sometimes, it's ridiculous. Our bodies change rapidly during this process, but our minds are going to take some time and effort. If only the surgery could fix our self-esteem like it fixes our appetites. :)

I could have written this myself! This is exactly the way I feel!

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beachwalker4rny    95

beachwalker4rny
Posted

One of the things that I did prior to surgery was take a before photograph. And then 6 months later I took an after photograph. I replicated the same pose.

Many people cannot see the changes after weight loss surgery. In my case I was the photographer in the family so I never appeared in the photographs. When I looked in the mirror all I saw was a straight on shot, so it was easy to overlook my weight. So my before and after photo was the best way to overcome my inability to see and appreciate my weight loss.

Operation.jpg

James, thank you for sharing your pictures! I should be more diligent to document as I go. When seen side by side like that you can see quite a dramatic difference.

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lifeofblair    308

lifeofblair
Posted

When I went for my 6 mo post op they took pics (also took before). That was the first time I could actually see the difference and man was it a big one.

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Learningtolive    109

Learningtolive
Posted

I also feel like I could've written that. I've cried to my therapist several times about this to be honest. I have those days where I feel like I've made no progress, or I'm not making any more progress. I jiggle my stomach or thighs and want to cry. I'm around 180 right now, we started around same size, etc. I feel this ALOT. One thing that hit home was when I actually put on a size 14 pair of pants, and this past weekend shopping for size Large shirts, which I haven't worn since high school. It's hard. I try to use those moments when I feel down or don't see what others see, to realize how far I have truly come and how much healthier I feel.

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pmanley    45

pmanley
Posted

It is funny that I would see this post today. I was just telling husband that every time (every day) I put on my size 18 pants I look at them and think *who am I kidding...these aren't going to fit* and then as if by magic the slip on and button...I don't see myself as smaller either. I don't dwell on it but it is very real and hard to get over. I made myself go and buy clothes that fit so that I can get used to being the new smaller me.

The struggle is real! Congrats on the weightloss...keep it up!

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Go To Topic Listing Gastric Bypass Surgery Forums

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    • LeighaTR

      LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
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    • Alisa_S

      Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.

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