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How to 'break up' with your surgeon?



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Okay, so background first before I get to my question: I was sleeved 10/22/2014 and, as of January, had lost 105 pounds. Which was great! I wasn't quite at my goal weight, but I was getting there steadily. I had absolutely no complications after my surgery; everything healed beautifully and I stuck to the diet. My surgeon always talked about how I crushed the statistics and how impressed he was.

Then, just after the first of January, I got sick. Like, really sick. It started with just nausea and some abdominal pain and I wrote it off as a stomach bug, but it just kept getting worse. Basically, I've been unable to eat anything solid for over a month now. Eating or drinking ANYTHING causes extremely sharp pain in my upper left abdomen, which is worse with anything that has a sugar/fat content. I've lost 18 pounds in less than a month because I can't eat anything aside from broth (sometimes) and sugar free jello/pudding. I have to drink the Zero Carb Isopure (clear liquid) for Protein because I can't keep down regular shakes. I have to crush my pills and Vitamins again. I'm constantly nauseous and extremely weak despite the fact that I'm getting my protein and vitamins. I can't even get down my one flight of stairs without having to rest in the middle.

After about two weeks and a trip to the ER for IV fluids, I went to my surgeon because I knew it wasn't a stomach bug anymore. He promised he'd figure it out and scolded me for going to the ER because they would have "no idea" how to treat a bariatric patient. Thinking it might be a blockage in my common bile duct from a stone, did a gallbladder ultrasound and a CCK HIDA scan. Both came back normal, even though the HIDA scan was absolutely excruciating. He referred me to a gastroenterologist for an upper endoscopy (which he was present at) and a barium swallow to make sure my esophagus was functioning correctly and that I didn't have ulcers or a stricture or something along those lines. Both came back normal.

Basically, since then, his office has been telling me that I need to speak with the gastroenterologist in regards to everything, as it has "nothing to do with" the surgery. The gastroenterologist told me today that I needed to follow up with the surgeon, as he was "out of suggestions". In essence, both my surgeon and gastro have thrown up their hands and told me that they have no idea, so it's not their problem. Neither will give me the paperwork I need for work. I am in danger of losing my job and therefore my health insurance.

My question here is how should I tell the office that I will no longer be visiting them for follow ups or for any other reason? Should I write a letter? Call them? I refuse to give them my business and what little money I have if they are willing to just give up on me and say 'it's not my problem'.

Any suggestions would be appreciated.

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You don't really need to tell them anything. Make an appointment with a new doctor, and if you like that doctor, you can fill out a records request in their office to have your records sent over.

If you have any future appointments scheduled, call and cancel them. If they ask why or if you want to reschedule, you can just say, "I'll call back."

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My suggestion is just don't go back. When you start seeing another Doctor have them contact the surgeons office for a copy of all of your records. He can also request all records from the gastro.

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Is there a University-level medical center anywhere near you? Honestly, what I'd do is take myself there to their ER and get seen via ER. GI issues can sometimes be devilishly hard to diagnose. The trouble with two specialists can be that neither one of them can figure it out, so they defer to the other.

I wish you well.

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I understand the need to "break up" with a dr. Sometimes you just need to get it off your chest. I spoke to the office manager when I did this. Not that it changed anything in the office but they knew how I felt. I would write a letter, let all your frustrations and issues be known. Not that you need to do this to see another Dr, but for your peace of mind.

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Thanks guys. I'll have the office request medical records when I see a new doctor. I'll have to travel a bit, but it's better than going to a doctor I don't trust/feel abandoned by.

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      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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