Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

How to Handle (Rudeness)



Recommended Posts

So when I left a Nutrition class 1 of the ladies who clearly doesn't feel she needs the surgery but still came to the meeting... Says to me.. Why do you think you need WLS? Instantly I felt the need to tell her about my hips knees ankles n feet. How I have had 6 surgeries on my feet etc etc. so she says u not heavy at all im 278lbs and you can't weigh what I weigh. You don't need it...... Now she just goes on a tangent about how she really Don't want the surgery but she was told that she needs it blah blah blah.....I'm not even interested in what she has to say but I still managed to smile and tell her to have a good day. As I started to hurt from standing there I began to walk/limp to my vehicle in the handicap area n she says how did you get that ( handicap sticker).. I shook my head. It's frustrating when people look at me and say things like that. You don't know my struggle or even my weight. You don't know my health issues etc... I felt like saying Mind Your Own business!!!!! Worry about yourself!!! ..... In the Future how should I handle this???

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Honestly, all you can do is worry about you. If you spend all your time wasting energy on negative people you'll be exhausted from that alone. Remember the one thing you have control over is you and how you react. If you need to ignore it or tell yourself how miserable that person must be....then so be it.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Sounds like this person was being rude because she is feeling self-conscious and insecure herself. She's trying to justify her own crappy decisions but reducing your difficulty, which is none of her business anyway. You said it above and it's so true, no one knows your life and your struggle, so no one but you gets a say in what you do and how you deal with things. Hopefully this rude person will grow up a little, but if not, this is about you and not her. Do what you need to do. :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@@jj7481 and @ cervidae thank you so much for your response. You guys are Right. This Journey is Mine.. Negative people are everywhere and I think it just shocked me because she was in the class. My assumption that only Positive people are on this journey was wrong. I now know to be aware.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I agree with what everyone has said.

Another thing I have noticed is that even though everyone who has WLS (or is even considering it) is overweight or obese, that may be the ONLY thing they have in common.

Obesity is a disease that affects all kinds of people. There is a wide range of people with different levels of life experience, age, education level, self awareness, common sense, socioeconomic class, and physical, emotional and intellectual capacity and capability. It takes all kinds!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I feel sometimes when your on the right path something always tries to get in your way. The devil, bad vibes whatever you believe or don't it's like a test. Just stay the course and laugh off the people like that. I would have been vague and said we all have issues...good luck.

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-G870A using BariatricPal

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

You meet really rude people along the way. I can't understand why parents allow there children to be rude. When children are rude I don't blame them I just stare at their parents. I heard even from my parents for years oh u have to loose weight. Even when I was in the hospital sick my mom says to me oh stacy you have to lose weight, I had a bad infection. I didn't get it.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Just say "Thank you for your concern, but I got this" and walk away. That's the only way to really deal in a respectful matter. You don't have to read or shade them, but kill them with tactiful kindness.

Technically speaking, you don't know that person from Adam's paint, so she didn't need an explanation. So don't be ashame to say none of your business.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I would have told her to mind her business I didn't ask you to your opinion and then I was smiled and said have a good.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • vsg.with.sharon

      Hey everyone!
      I’m new here! Looking for some friends! 🥰
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • LeighaTR

      Four days post surgery. I am sipping as fast as I can and getting NO WHERE near the goal of 60 - 80 grams of protein or the 64 oz of liquids. I just feel FULL. I don't know if it can still be the gas build up (I would think by now that would be gone) but it is a struggle to drink. And so far I have not had the nausea or spasms and don't want to wander into that territory by pushing too hard with liquids. I about passed out today as it was my most "strenuous" day. Went from second story to basement for shower and I was sure I was going to pass out. Looking back on my last few days I have had a total of less than 1000 calories. Am I just not getting enough nourishment in me? Once again a friday where I can't get ahold of the doc until Monday rolls back around so I am hoping maybe someone here has some experience on how to keep energy going. I do have fibromyalgia too and that may be where some added fatigue comes into play. How did you all fair with the goals the week after surgery?
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      2 days until I fly out to San Diego to have my Bypass Surg. in Tiajuana Mexico. Not gonna lie, the nerves are starting to surface. I don't fear the surgery itself, or the fact that I'm traveling alone, but its the aftermath that I'm stressing about the most, after this 8 week wait. I'm excited to finally be here, but I am really dreading the post surgical chapter. I know its going to be tough, real tough and I think I'm just in my head to much now that the day i here. Wish me luck, Hopefully I'm one of the lucky ones, and everything goes smoothly. Cant wait to give an exciting update,. If there is anyone else have a June bypass or even a recent one, Id love to have someone to compare war stories with. Also, anyone near San Antonio Tx? See ya soon with the future me. 💜
      · 3 replies
      1. Phil Penn

        Good Luck this procedure is well worth it I am down to 249.6 lb please continue with the process..

      2. Selina333

        I'm in Houston so kind of near you and had the sleeve in Dec. Down 61 lbs. Feeling better. Was definitely worth it. I hope the everything is going well for you. Update us when you can!

      3. Doughgurl

        I am back home after my bypass surgery in Tiajuana. I'm post op day 4. Everything went great! I guess I'm one of the lucky ones who have not encountered much pain at all, no nausea thus far and I'm having no problem keeping down broths and water. Thank you for your well wishes. I cant wait to keep up this journey and have a chance at better health and simply better quality of life. I know there will be bumps in the road ahead, and everything won't be peaches and cream, but at least I have a great start so far. 😍

    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×