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The Heart of the Matter



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Obesity is the symptom of underling issues. I am very thankful that I was able to have VSG almost a month ago. However, the surgery is just a medical intervention to a problem that is not solely medical. This post will discuss the emotional/psychological aspects of weight gain.

If obesity was simply a medical issue then all WLS would work of 100% of the time. However, we know this is true. Yes the success rate of having surgery is greater than that of people who lost weight by diet and exercise alone. This post is not about the success rate or failure of VSG or any other procedure. If we look at obesity as merely the outcome of inactivity and too high calorie consumption we are not looking at the root cause.

How many of us would say this is true of us:

*I grow up in a food insecure household and as a result I would either hoard food overeat at meals?

*My was physically/sexually/or severely neglected as a child?

*I was never thought how to deal with my emotions as a child, so as an adult I dealt with them through what I ate?

*I eat when I am hungry

*There are indicators in my life that I binge eat

I could go on, but I think you are starting to get my point. If we have been misusing food then we must learn what compels us to do so. It is my strongest belief that until we deal with the underlining issues of our emotional eating long term success will be more of struggle and for some it will be impossible. Please know that I am by no means mastered this area of me life, but I am aware it needs to mastered. However, I have read books, I journal, and next month I want to start counseling. I will confess I emotionally eat. I eat to reward myself. I overeat in social settings. I was sexually abused as a child. I started become heavy shortly there after. I view my extra weight as a mark in my physical being of that abuse. I have carried around this mark for close to 30 years. It is my belief that surgery will allow me to remove this mark from my person.

Regardless of where you are in the journey if you have not taken the time to exam the emotion/psychological aspects of your obesity I would suggest you do. Exercising-- good. Changing eating habits-- good. Taking the time to heal old wounds-- the best. There is a song with the line, "Lord make me over." I want to be "made over" in my own being not just physically. May the Lord make you over in your entirety.

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I have been in therapy for 9 months and only really knew I was ready for wls after 4 months of therapy..I completely agree with your post but also know that not everyone realizes that over eating and/or binge eating stems from deep seeded issues.. I am just so happy that I have control of my eating habits now mentally and physically.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
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    • KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
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    • bellaamey

      https://alluniqueguide.com/java-burn-coffee-reviews/
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