Very regretful today

[Mbain 29]

I have loathed my period since the first time I got it; I am 2 weeks and 3 days since surgery and I got it this week but it came 4+ days earlier and it is heavier and longer than it's ever been, and I am not happy about it. I read that WLS can mess with your hormonal balance, but I learned this just this week, I should have researched more, but I was so excited at the possibility of losing weight fast, that I did not do my research more thoroughly. I am very regretful of my decision, today. It's been a week and my weight loss has stopped, I cannot eat what I want (I am on the pureed foods stage), I cannot down the required amount of Protein shakes everyday (I am SO SICK OF SHAKES!), now my usual light and short period is this heavy/long thing that I hate! I am feeling regretful, and I know there is nothing now that I can do about it. My fear, and I have expressed this to my husband, is that all I will lose is the 30 lbs already lost and that I will just be stuck at this weight from now on; not even the clothes that used to fit when I was this weight in the past fit me now, adding to my sense of hopelessness. Call it emotional imbalance, hormonal imbalance, I don't care. I am a mental health professional so I know all about being rational and irrational, and the charge of emotions that come with life changing decisions, but I also know that it's OK to feel down and defeated at times, as long as you don't stay there; today I feel defeated, I feel down, I feel disappointed and depressed, mainly on myself; I do not blame my surgeon, I blame me for wanting a quick easy fix, I am a mess and yet I have to be strong because I have two little girls at home so I cannot curse and scream and kick at this decision, I have to be strong for them and pretend I am getting better; not even my husband knows how I really feel.

If this is all the weight I will lose, I will eventually come to grips with it, but it would be rather disappointing to have gone through such a radical procedure to change my body, my gastrointestinal composition, to gain nothing from it, but a 30 lbs weight loss. Yes, I know I am only two weeks out, yes I understand stalls, yes I can rationally tell myself that I am too early into this stage, In can tell myself to be patient and I have, but I am angry, the one thing I could count on was a "normal for me" period, and now I don't even have that. I am supposed to be flying to SC tomorrow for a wedding and back when I dreamed that I would go shopping and buy something smaller than anything I currently own, but I can't, nothing smaller than a 3X will fit. I am not looking for self-pity, or a sermon, or anything, I just want to vent; my husband has been wonderful about all this, and I do not want to boggle him with my frustrations. I feel defeated.

????

[JamieLogical 8,727]

I know it's probably of little comfort to you right now, but nearly every single one of us goes through this stage of "buyer's remorse". I absolutely promise you will get past this. You WILL lose more weight (we all go through stalls). You WILL be able to eat the foods you want to eat again. You WILL feel NORMAL again. Your periods will get back to normal too.

Is it true that you maybe didn't do as much research as you should have? Maybe. But that ship has sailed. The good news is, pretty much everything you are experiencing right now is temporary. In a few months you will be rocking your sleeve, losing weight, and feeling great. Hang in there!

[Babbs 14,681]

Okay, first of all just breath. It's all going to be okay. I promise.

What you're feeling is completely normal. I saw the title of your post, and knew you were very early out, because ALL those posts are when people are very early out. That's how normal it is!

You just had major surgery, you're having your period, your life is now turned upside down, and you can't eat right now. Who wouldn't feel like sh*t about things??

There's lots of hormones involved. Female hormones, and the hormones dumped during surgery and subsequent fat loss. The scale isn't moving because it's just needing a break from the losses you've experienced. Happens to everyone. Really!

If you continue to work your program, drink your fluids and work on getting your Protein, you will lose more weight. I GUARANTEE you this is not it for you. If it is, I will eat my hat. And I have a tiny tummy, so I don't even think it would go down well. That's how sure I am you are going to continue to lose doing what you're supposed to do

Just hang in there. It gets better as you heal and each day goes by. Soon you will look back on this moment feeling happier, healthier, and thinner and it will all be a distant memory.

[Mbain 29]

Guess my patience had also left me after this! Thank you both, I keep telling myself I am too early on the process; I am really trying to be patient, I did not get in the scale this morning and won't do it until once per week from now on. I see other members like both of you that have lost the weight and I get real hopeful; guess it's just the "fat girl" fear that I will stay like this.

Thank you both, I really needed to vent, I may feel better about it all; I need to breathe and relax, I need to busy myself so I stop thinking about it cortisol is not good for stress!

[Babbs 14,681]

@@Mbain

Atta girl! You're going to do just great! Wait and see! Take these first harder weeks one day at a time

[HopeandAgony 566]

On Monday I will be 4 weeks post op. My period came, like clockwork, when I was just over 2 weeks post op. The week before it start (1 week post op) I GAINED 2 lbs. I stayed there, with a 2 lb gain for 4 days!

I am currently in another stall for 5 days. No gain this time but no loss for 5 days either.

I down 19 lbs since surgery. I lost 13 lbs in my 2 week pre op diet for an overall total of 32 lbs.

I had severe buyers remorse until week 3. I had severe diarrhea, I was in a ridiculous amount of pain. I regretted surgery every second of every day. Then at week 3 I saw my Dr. He stopped the shakes which stopped the diarrhea. I started to notice less pain.

Outside of saying things do get better, i will share one thing to hopefully lighten your day. I am left handed. We have this surgery on the majority of our left sides... My first 2 weeks using the rest room were hard enough if you get the left hand/left side pain correlation. But then my period came and made bathroom adventures 100 times more complicated. It was an embarrassing mortifying nightmare. I remember quietly crying sitting there. My husband asking frantically if I am ok. Me trying to explain how badly it hurt to wipe, trying to use my right hand with ZERO coordination.

Hang in there

[KindaFamiliar 3,867]

Wow...

You really are having a shitty day/week...

I've nothing more to add than the ladies before me...

I'm simply acknowledging that yes, the peaks and troughs, especially in the early days, can be much more intense than they normally would be..

From what I see, you're all over this like a ...

Well, you're all over it...

Good luck with kicking your current form slump...

To use a popular Australian term - She'll be 'right mate..

[Mbain 29]

@@HopeandAgony

Wow, I do get it, and I am truly glad to hear things are getting better for you. Pain for me has not been an issue, I surprisingly have not taken any pain meds since about 3 days post-op. I understand the gain frustration. I just need to be kinder to myself and remember why I did this. Buyer's remorse is the worse! Thanks for your advice

[Trinn 139]

I am just going to tell you, I am totally feeling you on the crazy heavy period thing. I have spent my life as as "2 days and done" sort of person. The first period after WLS was some sort of crazy Biblical apocalypse. I was basically hysterical in the middle of the night one night because I had an accident in the bed, and was trying to clean it up, then it happened *again*. My sweetie finally made me some tea and just sat with me, he felt so bad about how upset I was about it. But I tell you, the next time was a little better, and two months later, it's reasonably manageable.

[HopeandAgony 566]

I remember wondering if the blood thinner we have to take impacts our first period. I don't know for sure and I never asked but I feel like it's a legit theory!

Edited December 11, 2015 by HopeandAgony

[Mbain 29]

@@HopeandAgony

You know, that would be a good theory; the bruise on my arm where they gave me the shots it's still there! It took forever to start to fade and it's finally leaving. I'll ask at my month post-op, but I hope this s#!& stops soon!

[JamieLogical 8,727]

If heavy periods continue to be a problem for you, you could always look into options to curb or stop it with your OB/GYN. I'm on Seasonale, which means I only get my period every 3 months and when I do, it is very light. I know there are other options available that will stop it altogether.

[Amelia Bedelia 39]

My NUT warned us about heavy periods during our last pre op class. She said it's due to all the estrogen that was previously being stored in fat being released into our bodies. She said when it happens (because it's very likely), we should call our gyn to discuss options first, then call her so we can see if we need more Iron.

[Cheeselife 68]

Prebiotic can help too, my pcp told me that hormones are absorbed and regulated by our gut bacteria too.

My period arrived the day before surgery, it was fine though, I leaked in my hospital bed that night, but who cares? Mine are short, so it's pretty much done now, but I agree that it's painful to change a pad and wipe, especially if you're needing to wipe the seat too!

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