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How Gastric Sleeve has changed my life



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This taken from a status I wrote on Facebook last night...

The last time I went running, I had an interesting experience...there were just 2 of us on the indoor track, myself and another woman. I was jogging a lap, and then walking a lap. On about my 3rd jogging lap, the other woman turned as she heard me approach her to pass, and turned and gave me a double thumbs up and mouthed "You GO!!" (I'm assuming she mouthed it, I had my ipod on). It dawned on me, I was "the fatty running on the track", the one that the story is written about. I appreciated the encouragement, but that got me to thinking; I don't know where I stand in terms of my size. It was easier to describe myself when I weighed 74lbs more...I was "heavyset" and "all personality"....now, I am not thin....but I don't think I am exactly heavyset. I have used (not derogatorily, per se) the words "fat girl" to describe myself, and twice been told "you're not fat anymore"..."fat" was my identity. Now, I am finding out I am so much more awesome than "fat", and it has nothing to do with the number on the scale. It has to do with finding my value, and feeling cute, young and lively...it has to do with loving who I have become....losing the weight just let me actually show off my inner sparkle. While I am shedding weight, I am shedding my self consciousness, I am shedding my self doubt, and when I look in the mirror, or at pictures, FOR ONCE all I see is the awesome, zany, spunky, sparkly, loving, funny, kind, sensitive person that I have always been. Losing weight didn't make me a better person, it just allowed me to see past an exterior I hated to see the amazing, lovely woman I have always been.

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Ok, I have to say I really hated it when people threw encouraging words to me while I was running as the fatty. I understand that they are trying to be supportive and kind and I appreciate the gesture, but I alwasy wondered....do you really say that to a thin person? Turns out, they do. I run most days and I am now well within the range of being a thin person and people still do periodically say "good job!", "good for you for getting out here", and "way to go". In fact the other day an old man said something along the lines of.."it must be hard running everyday, good for you for trying". I was sort of offended at first because when I was heavy I would have assumed he meant that it must be hard for my fat butt to go for a run everyday when I am so out of shape. I'm not fat anymore though so now I take it as probably the way it was intended...it is hard to get out and get a run in everyday with all of life's obstacles, and good for me for getting it done.

So, good for you for running...not because you might be heavier than other people on the track, but because running is a pain in the butt, it is tiring and hot and I really don't think anyone actually enjoys running until they are done with it. Good for everyone, fat, thin, tall, short, disabled, old, young....everyone...for everyday they get in a workout. There is a reason the prefix is "work" and not "fun".

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You can really feel your renewed appreciation for life and how you're living it to its fullest in your words. Great insight'

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@@LivingLight

The change on the inside is one of the biggest gifts. I had to get rid if my inner fat girl with a chip on her shoulder to move forward. Take all the compliments and encouragement to keep you motivated. I hope they put a smile on your face and remind you of how amazing you are.

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OhI certainly live life to the fullest. I have tons of energy, I work a full time job, a part time job, do photography on the side, ride my horse, and still go out with my friends. I worked a 16 hour day this week, between my 2 jobs....no problem!

Life is incredible! I can't believe I have the energy I do. I'm 42, my friends are 27-30, and I keep up NO problem!!

More than that though, I appreciate life and myself. I appreciate my great qualities...and my flaws...and everything that makes me uniquely me.

My thoughts are not that people shouldn't appreciate themselves if they are overweight, not by a LONG shot. My best friend is overweight, and she has amazing confidence (real confidence, not the kind that is used to pretend you love yourself). My journey needed me to stop hating how I looked to appreciate WHO I am. To stop hating how I looked, I had to lose weight.

I have SO much respect for those who have more strength than I do, and simply love themselves, with or without extra weight.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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