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Calling Anyone Who's Gained Serious Weight Down The Road?



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I'm early in my sleeved experience but attend a support group where a few members are struggling with regain. One gentleman had regained close to 40 pounds, another 50 pounds (out of 175 pounds lost) and a lady who is about 7 years out had regained close to 60 pounds (out of 200 pounds lost).

The reasons why included big life blows as @@VSGAnn2014 noted but also moving away from the nutrition and activity guidelines. They shared that there is a point in this experience where one might feel or decide that they just want to eat whatever they want, Protein needs be damned. They also stopped tracking and exercise stopped being a priority.

In the case of the guy who gained 40ish pounds, he adopted a vegan diet and has since lost 67 pounds. He also has started tracking, planning and cooking again. The others did not share how/if they are doing anything differently.

what i found interesting was the amount of shame and self-disgust that people expressed. I was really struck and pained by it because to me, they are not failures. they have not failed their weight loss efforts or surgeries. they still have the tool and can develop/resume the habits needed for success.

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"Just an observation, but if someone did regain a great deal of weight, chances are pretty good that they are not active on this forum. We are a self-selecting group and chances are pretty good that participating on this forum is 1) very helpful in reaching our goals, and 2) indicative that we haven't given up whatever our experience."

I think this probably true, so let me modify my question.

Have you or anyone you know personally had a big gain back...

No, but I am still early in my journey.

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P.S. My shrink says that after people lose all their excess weight have to find NEW motivations and NEW goals to inspire their commitment to the lifestyles that will keep them thin. After the initial weight loss, he says, the compliments stop, the thrill of being newly slim fades, boring real life pales by comparison to the excitement of watching the weight fall off. He says those who are most successful long-term are those who actively identify and work toward new goals. In other words, the most goal-oriented patients are those who have a natural advantage in keeping their weight off.

I LOVE this thinking and it's what is currently working for me! I settled at my new weight at a year out. A big part of my new lifestyle is fitness--running and yoga specifically.

I held steady easily to 18 months out and my goal of running a full Marathon. Then I gained some (8-10lbs) after inactivity following my plastics. Setting new running goals and scheduling races is what got me back down to "fighting weight" and keeps me on track. So far anyhow. Going on two years now so still a long way to go before I feel like I've got maintenance down, but I think continuing to set new goals will be a HUGE part of it for me.

"Just an observation, but if someone did regain a great deal of weight, chances are pretty good that they are not active on this forum. We are a self-selecting group and chances are pretty good that participating on this forum is 1) very helpful in reaching our goals, and 2) indicative that we haven't given up whatever our experience."

I think this probably true, so let me modify my question.

Have you or anyone you know personally had a big gain back...

Yes I think you are correct here

Just an observation, but if someone did regain a great deal of weight, chances are pretty good that they are not active on this forum. We are a self-selecting group and chances are pretty good that participating on this forum is 1) very helpful in reaching our goals, and 2) indicative that we haven't given up whatever our experience.

Yes this exactly

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I know a woman who had RnY surgery about 5-6 years ago and lost 150 pounds. I'd guess she has regained nearly 100 pounds.

She's very smart, highly educated, is a therapist herself. I say that to suggest that the monkeys on some of our backs are very hard to throw off and keep off.

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I personally do NOT know anyone who had had surgery only to regain a lot back. That said, I've heard about a lot of "aunts", "cousins", "neighbor's mother's sisters", etc. ;) You know, all the horror stories that people love to share about this "easy way out" we chose - the one that really doesn't work anyway.

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Good point, @@LipstickLady ....

For counterpoint, here's a four-year surgiversary announcement made here yesterday:

http://www.bariatricpal.com/topic/354253-4-years-ago-today-i-was-wheeled-into-surgery/?hl=%2Bqueen+%2Bcrop#entry3991321

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I personally do NOT know anyone who had had surgery only to regain a lot back. That said, I've heard about a lot of "aunts", "cousins", "neighbor's mother's sisters", etc. ;) You know, all the horror stories that people love to share about this "easy way out" we chose - the one that really doesn't work anyway.

Yes, me too. I have followed them down and they were either lap-bands or old school stomach stapling, thus far no VSG or RNY's.

As I look around this forum, it seems to me that there are two frequent causes; drinking sugary sodas or other drinks all day and/or eating complex sugary/fat carbs rather than Protein and healthy meals (and yes in most cases it was accompanied by some sort of major life trauma).

So to further narrow the question, soda/sugar bad habits not withstanding, has anyone (or anyone you know) gained back more than 10 pounds while following a rather normal person's diet?

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My aunt did have gastric bypass about 8 years ago and she gained all her weight back plus some. She's taking "diet pills" now. It's sad and it sucks! On the other hand we are talking about a woman who would still visit the buffets and continue to eat even when it caused her pain. I think it was inevitable in her case. It can and does happen. So with that being said I am hyper aware of this fact and I take measures to keep myself in check. Ex: the 5 day liquid diet as a nice reminder.

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@@LipstickLady Yes! She's for real my aunt! I know her personally, I've seen the butt shrink and extend....we're close like that!

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I know people who have been successful and people who have not. Those who have not and gained most, if not more weight back, failed to actually change their eating habits. One of them was drinking pop a lot and the other one, well she still continued to eat crappy processed foods like potato chips for her meals.

The ones who did manage to keep the weight off, as was stated by others earlier, did gain about 10-15lbs back around the 3 year mark, but one of them says that is fine with her, as she is very comfortable at the weight she has been maintaining and she didn't feel as healthy and strong when she was the 15lbs thinner.

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I completely understand your concern. One of my very best friends had the sleeve, lost 180lbs. Then found out she had ovarian and uterine cancer...between chemo, radiation, neuropathy and depression, she has gained a majority of her weight back. It really worried me how my surgery would effect her, but she is a trooper and helps me out daily. It is time to "retire" my first set of clothes and I am apprehensive about it...it took a lot of effort to find cute shrubs and jeans in my size I am emotionally attached to some of them...

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Sister had rny and gained back much but not all the weight back. She didn't change her eating habits from day one. drinks regular soda daily, fast food and lot and lots of chocolate candy. She NEVER exercises. The surgery is only a tool and not a miracle cure for obesity. I believe some effort is required for long term success.

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@ Just wanna say, I like your username. Cool.

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      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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      1. LeighaTR

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
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