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@ I really hope all goes well. The good news is, as far as surgeries go, WLS is one of the safest. It has a lower mortality rate than knee replacement! And if you take into consideration that the vast majority of people undergoing WLS are morbidly obese, and are by default at higher risk from ANY surgery, that should tell you how safe it is. I think the best thing you can do is be loving an supportive.

This...^^^

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Normal weight range for her age and height is 120 - 160. I realize this is a family member and you are concerned, but unless you were in the room or see the actual application you cannot verify what was told to the insurance company. Questionable ethics aside, yes it's safe. She may be smaller than most people who have the surgery but that may play into her favor in terms of recuperation. I agree with @JamieLogical , at this stage the best thing you can do is be loving and supportive.

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Well that's the thing she's passed everything, she has her surgery date set for two weeks from now. Everyone has given her the thumbs up. I'm torn because my father is an investigator for the health department and I haven't told him about what the doctor did... That's what he does for a living he investigates people like that doctor.. But I don't want to over step here and ruin her date... I no she wants this I'm just scared that they fudged the papers. I dont know I won't be saying anything to my dad I guess but i dont know what to do here. If anything or maybe I should not do anything.

Sorry to seem all over the place I just am lost in these waters I've never been in before no what I mean

But you ARE overstepping. It's great for you to be concerned over your family member. The Health Department investigates things like whether the office is clean in all the right places not medical records. Please, stay out of this. Support your loved one by NOT second guessing her, or her doctor.

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@@Annie67 - Don't report the guy. Has her weight yo-yo'd? If she had been working on it, and she's noticing its creeping back up, she may have been really concerned that it's going to happen again. I mean 180 is not like an anorexic getting the surgery.

Speaking of that, let's lighten the mood...

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I know I would have been devastated and furious beyond belief if a family member had intervened and 'reported' my surgeon. A grown woman is entitled to make her own mistakes (if this is, in fact a mistake at all).

Believe me, as a professor of ethics, I can see your dilemma. You care about your family member and have learned about something potentially unethical. To blow the whistle, or not?

Ask yourself this: Who will benefit and who will suffer as a result of your whistle-blowing?

Everything said here on this thread is legitimate in some way. Remember, we are all bariatric surgery vets and are on the other side. You may notice that many people came to the defence of your family member and are passionate about protecting her right to move forward with her surgery. This is because we ourselves know the enormity of that commitment and the agony/anxiety leading up to surgery day.

If the surgeon is licensed and legit, and your family member is of sound mind, no intervention is required, methinks!

(And to answer your question, that she is down 20 pounds prior to surgery is normal. The majority of bariatric patients are put on a liquid (or severely restricted diet) prior to their surgery in order to shrink the liver.

I've lost 64 pounds with my WLS, and am 195 (woo!) and still considered 'obese'. Whether 380 pounds or 180 pounds, obesity is considered an individual issue for every person. Each person has their own co-morbidities that accompany their being overweight. Your family member is no different and this was likely factored in to the surgeon's decision to allow her to qualify for insurance coverage by playing with the numbers on the scale.

Just my 2 cents.

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I know a lot of great advice has been given but I will give my 2 cents anyway.

I am 5'7 - 5'8 (depends on the day) and my weight at surgery time was 236. So I was 3 to 4 inches taller and only 30 some pounds heavier than your aunt. I had surgery. It was an elective for me for the fact that I didn't have any co-morbidities (it was weird that I sort of prayed for them so my insurance would cover the surgery - but that's another story all together) My BMI was 35 to 36 at the time of surgery. Besides the age factor I feel like I am comparable to your Aunt in the other categories. I did this for me because I have yo-yoed all my life. I can lose the weight but not keep it off. They perform this type of surgeon on patients who have stomach cancer and are not overweight or obese. It is a relatively safe surgery and I wouldn't worry too much about her well being. This is not going to "harm" her in any way.

Another piece of advice I will give you is that you are weighed before surgery. This gives everyone in the room the exact knowledge of what type and dosage of meds to give you so they don't over sedate you. I would rest easy, she is going to be fine.

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What type of weight loss surgery is she having ?

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No one but a medical professional can answer you question. All anyone here can do is give their opinions on the situation.

The surgeon doesn't sound legit as he is skirting the regulations he has in place for his patients and LYING on her paperwork which is illegal. It is fraud and unethical. Does that sound legit to you?

First of all I am not telling her she can't do what she wants but as her family I am comcerned for her safety. I wanted feed back not your personal opinions If you have nothing that is helpful to day please don't waste my time! You are not answering my question. She is 50 years old 5'4 and 180 pounds right now. The surgeon is legit. I just worry for her I no those regulations are put in place for a reason I don't want to see something happen to her during surgery because this doctor lied on her paper work. He added 30 pounds to her paper work and she has no health issues but he added some on there.

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Annie67,

As for the question about whether the surgeon is legit and your response that it’s the program that decides: in some ways, yes. The program decides about financial aspects; that is, whether to pay for the surgery. The surgeon, though, has every right and responsibility to refuse to accep the money and the patient if the surgeon feels the patient is not a good candidate.

It’s a really individual decision. Some people at the height and weight you mentioned should not get surgery, for example, if they just need diet guidance. Others, though, may have already tried every diet under the sun, and still are gaining weight, and maybe just don’t want to wait until they’re way heavier just to “prove” to everyone that they need it.

Since the surgeon did lie on the paperwork, I would be extra sure to bring that up the day of surgery. Often, once numbers get “into the system,” it’s nearly impossible to override them. You don’t want the med team to glance at the fudged numbers without double checking the correct ones, so it’s probably best to remind them.

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I used to think that unless a person was above a certain BMI, they were ridiculous for considering WLS, but with 2 years hindsight living in a healthy body, I no longer hold that narrow view. I was sleeved at 235 pounds 5'6" and at my consult so I barely qualified via the insurance requirements. Obese since childhood, I'd begun to develop diabetes and my high blood pressure and high cholesterol needed lots of medication to control these obesity related conditions. I couldn't breathe well and exercise was not even a consideration most days. I just didn't have the energy. Having lost the same 60 ish pounds multiple times in 40 years I knew losing it wasn't the problem, but keeping it off was a losing battle for me.

Here's the deal... When I'd gotten half way through my 95 pound loss, around 185, I felt good. I looked good. Some friends were telling me to "stop, you look great now", but I was still clinically overweight, not yet off all the medication and exercise was still really hard. By the time I'd achieved a "normal" BMI, (I hang out around 23-24 now), things were much different. I could breathe and move easier which made exercise a joy rather than a chore and I was off all the meds to treat the co-morbidities of obesity. So yes, I believe a person merely classed as "overweight' can benefit, but that needs to be a conversation between patient and doctor. Hopefully multiple doctors.

Yes, there is a huge risk to bariatric surgery, but the same holds true for folks who choose to have plastics. Insurance concerns aside, would you judge someone who chooses a implants and a butt lift any differently? People choose elective procedures all the time for their own reasons. At least with WLS one of the goals\effects is better health. A better body, yes! I'd be lying if I said I'm not enjoying my skinny jeans, but the gift of good health has been worth more than I could have imagined when I started this journey.

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    • Doughgurl

      2 days until I fly out to San Diego to have my Bypass Surg. in Tiajuana Mexico. Not gonna lie, the nerves are starting to surface. I don't fear the surgery itself, or the fact that I'm traveling alone, but its the aftermath that I'm stressing about the most, after this 8 week wait. I'm excited to finally be here, but I am really dreading the post surgical chapter. I know its going to be tough, real tough and I think I'm just in my head to much now that the day i here. Wish me luck, Hopefully I'm one of the lucky ones, and everything goes smoothly. Cant wait to give an exciting update,. If there is anyone else have a June bypass or even a recent one, Id love to have someone to compare war stories with. Also, anyone near San Antonio Tx? See ya soon with the future me. 💜
      · 1 reply
      1. Phil Penn

        Good Luck this procedure is well worth it I am down to 249.6 lb please continue with the process..

    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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