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The weight loss surgery journey is all about chasing and achieving goals for weight loss, healthy eating, new activities, and tons of other NSVs at every stage of the journey. When you set new goals, do you share them with other people? With whom? And do you update them on your progress so you can get support? Or do you prefer to keep your goals personal until you hit them so you can focus on the goal?

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I am one of those who have shared my WLS on Facebook. I have shared many of my goals, scale victories and non scale victories. Not every single one, because I don't want people to think that's all I talk about, but the BIG ones, like the first time I ran the distance of a 5K, or when I reached 80 pounds lost. I would update everyone how close I was to my 5K goal periodically. I got so much love and encouragement, it kept me going. I've even been told I was an inspiration a time or two. That always helps me strive to be the best that I can be, and keeps me motivated to lead by example and set new goals.

I have the best, most supportive friends and family in the world!

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I mostly keep my goals to myself. Only my sister who had had WLS knows what all my mini goals are. Only my doctor/nutritionist (and bariatric pal peeps) know my ultimate weight goal.

The reasoning is because this... When I successfully did Weight watchers in the past I told everyone and anyone. I got to a point I was very happy with where I was, still obese, but felt and looked so much better. I started working in maintenance just to see if I could maintain. But people would make comments like, keep at it, just a little more to go etc. It totally messed with my head-- left me feeling like I shouldn't be enjoying what I had accomplished. They meant well, but my head interpreted differently.

So I keep my goals to myself and relish in them privately, or on these boards. That way, others views on my being 'finished' (or not) with this journey won't mess with my emotions again.

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As an obese person I often"self protected" and as a result was sometimes perceived as standoffish. On of my major changes is to be more vulnerable and open with people. I only shared progress and goals whilel losing on here. Now that I in maintenance I am very open with my friends about regain/eating challenges etc. It is part of my transformation and I have found it to be very positive.

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As an obese person I often"self protected" and as a result was sometimes perceived as standoffish. On of my major changes is to be more vulnerable and open with people. I only shared progress and goals whilel losing on here. Now that I in maintenance I am very open with my friends about regain/eating challenges etc. It is part of my transformation and I have found it to be very positive.

Interesting post, CGJ.

Hmmm .... thinking ....

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Some but not all. There are ones that I will share with family/friends like wanting to run a 5K, and I've even asked them to help me think up some NSVs. There are others that I feel are too embarrassing/personal that I would keep to myself, I mean at least until it happens maybe.

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I've been open with my Family- Friends- and Co Workers, and I figure when people start to notice and ask I'll just tell them. I feel like I've already faces some challenges with people saying "you lost 30lb on pre-op diet, why not just continue that". Good Question. Quality of Life. I'm just going to keep on keeping on.

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My twin sister and I are going to have the surgery on November if everything goes well. We have decided not to tell or family or friends on Facebook we stopped posting pictures and made a new Facebook for the two of us where we are only adding people who have done the surgery or are going to doit. This will be our support system for now. We will only let our immediate family know. ones we have reached one of our goals then we will add pictures on Facebook so everyone could see how we are doing.

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    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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