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Need Suggestions for What to Tell People Who Ask If I've Had WLS



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I tell people I'm doing a number of things differently: Seeing a shrink, using My Fitness Pal to plan and track all my menus, wearing a Fitbit, eating more Protein, avoiding starchy, processed foods foods, and going to the gym.

That's all true. :)

Friends and family have seen me yo-yo diet all my life. They think the stars finally aligned for me.

The End. :)

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My surgery isn't for another few weeks but I find that when I'm asked a personal question that I don't care to answer, it's SUPER easy to very quickly say "oh thank you and WOW i love your hair (earrings, skirt, lipstick color, etc). so, what are you up to this weekend?"

Even the nosiest of people would much rather talk about themselves than about you :)

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My surgery is scheduled for next month. I don't want to tell anyone but have to say something to my boss. Any suggestions as to what type of surgery would be equivalent to the sleeve as far as recovery time and restrictions?

Any female surgery.....hernia repair...

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I was very embarrassed and shy about telling people leading up to the surgery. I told my close friends and family slowly leading up to it as well as my coworkers. After surgery, I care a lot less about who knows. This is my journey. I have never had any negative feedback about it. I don't shout it from the rooftops, and don't tell strangers about it, but I am open if it comes up. I became more proud about my decision afterwards, but I completely understand being nervous now. Hopefully you have the same positive experience I did and it wont matter much afterwards. Own it! Be proud of it! Its the new you!

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I have been embarrassed of my body for a long time. I can't help but share my excitement of the changes that will be happening. I will be honest and tell them why. Those I've shared it with so far has been supportive. The main reason for this is to get healthy and be here for my family. Screw them if they don't see the reasons for it.

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@@Omla just tell your boss you are scheduled for surgery. You are not obligated to say anything more. If he/she presses (some people are clueless about both the law and etiquette) say "uhh, that's really personal . . ." and look as mortified as you possibly can. Let them assume you are having anal fissures repaired or something.

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I've found most people just say to me that I look good or wow, you've lost weight. I don't go into details unless someone is just demanding to know what I'm doing. Most people don't though. They just talk about it behind your back. LOL!

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I've been open and honest with people in my workplace. A lot of them have noticed me on my liquid diet and asked about it and I've told them it's to prep for my surgery next week. There's nothing to be ashamed of. I've had family members ask me why I just can't lose the weight naturally, but everyone at work has been super supportive.

Two of the ladies I've told have even been jealous!

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I'm very open about having had surgery. If someone asks how I lost all the weight, I say, "I had bariatric surgery last June. I haven't had a starch, or a sweet, or fruit juice, or a soda, or alcohol since then. I eat mostly Protein and vegetables, and I get exercise 4-6 times a week. It;'s hard work, but it's SO worth it because I feel great and I'm much healthier than I was before." Then if they have more questions, I answer them honestly. If anybody has a negative response, they haven't shared it with me. They usually say, "Wow, good for you!"

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I always remember " Oh what a tangled web we weave, when first we practice to deceive"

Once you start fibbing you have to remember who you told what. Just be truthful. They may be asking because they want to know how they can do the same.

If people are smart asses, then they aren't your friends anyway.

Be proud and show them its a great decision!

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I think I will say something like, "I used a surgical proceedure as a catalyst for radical across-the-board lifestyle changes in my pursuit of radiant health."

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    • Aunty Mamo

      Iʻm roughly 6 weeks post-op this morning and have begun to feel like a normal human, with a normal human body again. I started introducing solid foods and pill forms of medications/supplements a couple of weeks ago and it's really amazing to eat meals with my family again, despite the fact that my portions are so much smaller than theirs. 
      I live on the island of Oʻahu and spend a lot of time in the water- for exercise, for play,  and for spiritual & mental health. The day I had my month out appointment with my surgeon, I packed all my gear in my truck, anticipating his permission to get back in the ocean. The minute I walked out of that hospital I drove straight to the shore and got in that water. Hallelujah! My appointment was at 10 am. I didn't get home until after 5 pm. 
      I'm down 31 pounds since the day of surgery and 47 since my pre-op diet began, with that typical week long stall occurring at three weeks. I'm really starting to see some changes lately- some of my clothing is too big, some fits again. The most drastic changes I notice however are in my face. I've also noticed my endurance and flexibility increasing. I was really starting to be held up physically, and I'm so grateful that I'm seeing that turn around in such short order. 
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    • BeanitoDiego

      Oh yeah, something I wanted to rant about, a billing dispute that cropped up 3 months ago.
      Surgery was in August of 2023. A bill shows up for over $7,000 in January. WTF? I asks myself. I know that I jumped through all of the insurance hoops and verified this and triple checked that, as did the surgeon's office. All was set, and I paid all of the known costs before surgery.
      A looong story short, is that an assistant surgeon that was in the process of accepting money from my insurance company touched me while I was under anesthesia. That is what the bill was for. But hey, guess what? Some federal legislation was enacted last year to help patients out when they cannot consent to being touched by someone out of their insurance network. These types of bills fall under something called, "surprise billing," and you don't have to put up with it.
      https://www.cms.gov/nosurprises
      I had to make a lot of phone calls to both the surgeon's office and the insurance company and explain my rights and what the maximum out of pocket costs were that I could be liable for. Also had to remind them that it isn't my place to be taking care of all of this and that I was going to escalate things if they could not play nice with one another.
      Quick ending is that I don't have to pay that $7,000+. Advocate, advocate, advocate for yourself no matter how long it takes and learn more about this law if you are ever hit with a surprise bill.
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    • BeanitoDiego

      Some days I feel like an infiltrator... I'm participating in society as a "thin" person. They have no idea that I haven't always been one of them! 🤣
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    • ChunkCat

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    • BeanitoDiego

      Still purging all of the larger clothing. This morning, a shirt that I ADORED wearing ended up on top. Hard to let it go, but it was also hard to let go of those habits that also no longer serve my highest good. Onward and upward!
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