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Support after surgery-no one to help me



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I have a question? How much help from others such as family did you need after surgery? I am an only child, only grandchild on both sides, my parents have both passed away, no husband and no children and my circle of friends is very very small and most of them, live far away from me

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We are your support now! You will never be alone in this. I look forward to keeping in touch with others who are going through this at the same time. When is your surgery scheduled?

Edited by SueZQ1965

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Ditto SueZQ!!!!!!! You can always message me, click on my logo. And take some time and read the hundreds of posts on here, so you are truly prepared for the adventure ahead! Hugs to you.....

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Ms Spiritfilled we got your back, anything you want to know ask and we can help. This is a great support system.

Donna

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If you mean physically, none. Just a lifting restriction which wasn't hard to work around.

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yep...you'd only need help with lifting. I'd just not lift until you are released to lift. My husband wants to do for me...anything. But, I don't need help. I would love it if he would do the laundry, but really....I did it the night before surgery, and we both have enough undies and socks to make it till I can lift 15 pounds again. You can definitely do this by yourself.

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I live alone and didn't need any help. I made sure that the heavier chores (laundry, changing kitty litter, raking leaves) were done before surgery. My family all lives on the other side of the country from me, and I told my friends here to stay away. No offense to them but I didn't want them hanging around staring at me, or me feeling like I had to entertain them or something. I did just fine. It was nice to have time for myself and not have to worry about anyone else.

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You do not physically or emotionally NEED any support. I imagine it would be nice to have, but you will be just fine doing it entirely on your own. As the others have mentioned, this is a great place to ask questions, find new friends, and get emotional support. In terms of physically caring for yourself, you do not need anyone once you have been sent home. I drove myself to the hospital and home and I had no one at home with me for the entirety of my recovery. If you want it, you can have it, and you don't need anyone!

Good luck!

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None! Don't vacuum, don't lift stuff. I was outpatient, and drove the next day. Walk as much as possible to get the gas bubbles out and get as much rest as you can. If you do all your laundry and clean the house before surgery, you shouldn't need to do anything at all right after.

The only caveat is if you have a dog. My dog loves to chase an occasional squirrel so I was afraid to walk her for a few weeks post op. Other than that, there's nothing you shouldn't be able to do.

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I am not planned for surgery yet. My first appt. is May 4th. I live on the 3rd floor too, so I lug a bunch of stuff upstairs. I guess more trips and lighter loads. No dogs, but 3 kitties. No vacuuming.???? You ladies are awesome so thank you

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Physically, I felt good on the stairs as soon as I was off the pain meds. When I was taking them, i wanted someone around for the stairs and when I showered. Other than that, I didn't really need help from anyone else. I only even made sure my husband was around for my stairs and shower the first day I was home.

You won't have much to lug upstairs, because you won't be eating much. I would just make sure you have the basics before you go in for surgery. Have Protein shakes, SF popsicles and Jello, broth and tylenol on hand.

You will need someone to drive you home from the hospital when you get discharged and probably to get your prescriptions that day as well.

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Thank you. I will have trouble,finding someone to drive me home. There are options in Houston for about $75. If I have to do that I have to do that. I am scheduled for colonoscopy and endoscopic thingy May 19 and have some to take me home for that. Just not sure about surgery, but then I have to get approved first

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Do you belong to a church? Other community/social group?

Oftentimes there are people in our lives who would love to help if only they knew what we needed.

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The only help I needed was getting the kids to school because I was on Tylenol with codeine.

Other than that I had all the "food" I needed and Water and I was good.

You could/should also check with your doc and hospital about having visiting nurses assoc (VNA) on standby just in case.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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