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Dr. says 40 is too young...help



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I had a band for 2 years and it slipped and had to be taken out. Since the band, I have gained 30lbs, so I went to visit my bariatric doctor about a sleeve. He said that if he sleeved me at 40, the at 45 I would be fat again. He said it was not a good idea to take 85% of my stomach away at this age and then have nothing left to do when I'm older. He is really big on banding, but I hated the feelings I get with the band. I told him I would self pay and was ready. He said he would do it, but it would not be his recommendation. Right now, he has me on a diet and I feel like it is hopeless. What do you 40's (and others) people think? Thanks

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Honestly, I would get a 2nd and 3rd opinion on that. Is it possible that he prefers the more frequent visits (hence more frequent payments) that come with the Lap Band? I hate to think that way but money making is a big motivator for many physicians.

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Get another opinion. What's he saying... ALL people who get sleeved put their weight back on in 5 years? That's just stupid and wrong! MANY sleevers of ALL ages (band to sleeve converts included) take off all their weight and maintain just fine! It IS possible to fail at any WLS, but from the folks I know (banded and sleeved) the sleevers have MUCH BETTER long term results and half the complications!

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Many people far younger than 40 are having other WL surgeries, and I don't agree that in 5 years you will regain the weight (unless you aren't planning on following the plan for after the surgery). You will have to work to keep the weight off, that's no surprise. But there is also the revision to RNY after the sleeve surgery if the sleeve isn't working. So there are alternatives to the band, but if you will follow the after-plan after the sleeve surgery, I don't see why it wouldn't be a success. I agree with LeeRN, see other surgeons about this. I, too, think your dr. may have ulterior motives. It can't hurt to ask other doctors, and you may get it covered by insurance.

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I think this notion of being to young at 40 years old is ridiculous. I am 38 years old and had my surgery at 37. The idea and opportunity of surgery was there in my early 30's, but I waited because my doctor thought I was young enough to do some effective dieting.

The waiting did nothing but gave me more years of feeling miserable. I wasted my ealy-mid 30's being morbidly obese. I know, some people can have high self esteem while being huge. I wasn't one of them. I became a recluse and his from the world in every way possible.

In the end, I think I wasted many years of my life by not doing it earlier. Years when I should have been in my prime are lost. This is clear to me now since I've had surgery and lost over 115 pounds. I've made so many changes in my health and outlook on life. However, I'm trying to look forward instead of spending time regretting the past. Don't listen to this doctor, its your life and your choice.

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Get another doctor! I am not knocking the band, but my surgeon does not even do them anymore. I am 42, had sleeve surgery 12 weeks ago and have NO regrets. I started the process as soon as I realized my weight put me at the minimum BMI that my insurance would qualify me for surgery. I was beyond miserable and cannot imagine putting it off until I was older, heavier, diabetic, etc!

You say you are self pay, I would find another doctor. Best of luck to you!!!

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I agree completely with what everyone has said. I had the sleeve right after I turned 45 and wish I had done it earlier. Look for a surgeon who is with a Center of Excellence for WLS. If you can't find one near you, call my doctor's office in Atlanta and they could possibly help locate one for you. I used Dr. Hart at Atlanta Bariatrics. I felt like I was in excellent hands. Dr. Hart doesn't do lap bands much anymore either - that told me that I was making the right choice with the sleeve.

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I co-sign the "get another doctor" vote. Your doc doesn't sound as if he's comfortable with the surgery and that's the last knife you should want to be under.

The band seems to be phasing out ( more being undone and revised). Get with a skilled surgeon who is keeping abreast of research and doesn't reek of contradictions ( why is he expecting to keep performing surgeries on you in gradations throughout your life? Has he no faith in the surgeries he's willing to perform?)

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Wow!! Thank you each for the responses. I now know I am going to look elsewhere. I thought the same thing newbn1. I thought maybe he was not comfortable doing the sleeve and that is why he was not recommending it. He loves the band. I have been so depressed lately because I was so looking forward to the sleeve. I worked hard with my band to get my weight off, so I know I will work just as hard with the sleeve. You guys have encouraged me not to give up!!! Thanks again!!

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I'm voting with the "get another surgeon " crowd.

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Are you opting for the sleeve? I would love to know! I was sleeved at 44, but I am only 10 months post opp, but I have no regrets and think it was the best decision I ever made. I have clearly made a lifestyle change that I am comitted to and I am confident that i will stay committed. I hope you found another doctor.

Good Luck!

Jami

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Get a new doctor. This is your choice and you're over the age of consent.

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What a strange, strange comment and way of thinking.

If he honestly thinks that, he should STOP doing any bariatric surgery.

My interpretation is that he doesn't have confidence in his sleeving surgery skills.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
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