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the wait is going to kill me...



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Hi All

This is more of a vent than anything else. I had my first appointment in January and (get this) I didn't qualify because I wasn't heavy enough. I went back for a second appointment and, in February, I had my first qualifying weight. Because of my insurance I have to have 6 months of qualifying weight (surgery will be mid July). I honestly didn't think weighing what I weigh would be THIS mentally taxing. I am miserable every second of every day. I struggle not to cry each morning as I get dressed for work -- none of my clothing fits, my coats don't fit, I struggle to put shoes on. THIS IS HELL. I know I'm doing this for a short term and that the ends will absolutely justify the means but I feel like this is what hell must be like. I'm also completely terrified that once I get my 6th weight registered that my insurance company won't approve me (although I've been reassured multiple times that won't be the case). The doctor I'm working with is very positive and tries to keep me upbeat, he has a great staff who talks me off the ledge constantly. I KNOW in my heart this is the right thing for me, I'm so tired of struggling with weight and yo-yo diets. I'm ready to finally be the person I want to and to not have my weight be an issue.

Is anyone else in a similar situation? Have you found something that helps deal with the anxiety?

Thank you :)

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I feel the same way! I gained weight to avoid the 6 month supervised diet because I was close to a 50BMI and at 50 or over my insurance waives those requirments. My clothes don't fit it is hard to put on shoes and just move in gerneral. They are fast tracking me but it still feels like this is taking forever.

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You don't even look large... but I understand. There's many more reasons WLS should be considered. Hang in there and if you need support, I'm always available. Most of the time simply venting is enough. Goodness knows I've done my fair share over the years!! :)

Irene

Hi All

This is more of a vent than anything else. I had my first appointment in January and (get this) I didn't qualify because I wasn't heavy enough. I went back for a second appointment and, in February, I had my first qualifying weight. Because of my insurance I have to have 6 months of qualifying weight (surgery will be mid July). I honestly didn't think weighing what I weigh would be THIS mentally taxing. I am miserable every second of every day. I struggle not to cry each morning as I get dressed for work -- none of my clothing fits, my coats don't fit, I struggle to put shoes on. THIS IS HELL. I know I'm doing this for a short term and that the ends will absolutely justify the means but I feel like this is what hell must be like. I'm also completely terrified that once I get my 6th weight registered that my insurance company won't approve me (although I've been reassured multiple times that won't be the case). The doctor I'm working with is very positive and tries to keep me upbeat, he has a great staff who talks me off the ledge constantly. I KNOW in my heart this is the right thing for me, I'm so tired of struggling with weight and yo-yo diets. I'm ready to finally be the person I want to and to not have my weight be an issue.

Is anyone else in a similar situation? Have you found something that helps deal with the anxiety?

Thank you :)

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I am just hair or so taller and weigh about 20 lbs more - I hear ya. I am miserable and I am starting to really dread the humid Florida summer and I normally love the heat. I just cant get myself to buy any new clothes until after I have had surgery (hopefully in May) and have at least lost about 20lbs. I have clothes in my closet from size 13 to 22...and I have been wearing these pretty steadily since hitting the 260s.

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@@LilMissDiva Irene - Thank you. That's what everyone has said "but you aren't even that big!" Compared to some, I'm small but compared to others, I'm huge. I've struggled with yo-yo dieting my entire life. I've been diagnosed with PCOS and Hashimoto's - both make weight loss incredibly difficult. I'm just ready to have a permanent tool to help me finally win the weight loss battle.

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No it won't because if it did we would all be dead. Waiting stinks but it's worth it. Hang in there!

Edited by Elode

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@@lauren8486 I had to do the same thing. I was not quite heavy enough for insurance to cover it. I had to gain. Now I am miserable, also. My surgery is 4/23, THANK GOD! I want this weight GONE! I just cannot wait to not be hungry, to not enjoy food, to watch the pounds melt away. That may a little over-dramatic..but I get it! Hang in there. I think you and I are on our way to slimness and good health.

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Ha - tell me about it! I'm going through a 12 month wait for my health insurance to kick in :-/

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I understand. I have PCOS and the struggle is real

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I began my journey on 4/1/14 (I quit smoking for the sole purpose of having this surgery). I didn't have insurance that covers the surgery (my hubs), so I intended to take out insurance thru my employer in October 2014. (which was not in effect until 1/1/2015). (This was the time I had to ....um....put on "a few" pounds). On June 2, 2014 I had my 1st of 6 PCP appointments to record my weight and discuss diet and exercise. On July 3rd I had a sleep study, found I had sleep apnea...2 weeks later I had Pulmonologist appt, and picked up my CPAP. On Jan 2 2015 I had my first appt with the Bariatric Center.....Had my Psych visit on 2/10, Had my Nutrition class on 2/11, my EGD on 2/25, approved 3 days after the hospital submitted it to insurance and I am awaiting surgery on 4/23. So, in all actuality, this process took me a year and 23 days. (disclaimer.....I will not start smoking again! This is all about ME and good health). The waiting will not kill you. As fast as time fly's, it will be here before you know it....then you'll say...."where did the time go?!" Keep on keeping on!

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
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    • KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
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      https://alluniqueguide.com/java-burn-coffee-reviews/
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