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It is really frustrating when my fiancé doesnt support wls. He thinks it's the easy way out. If i really wanted it i should do it the "right way!" It would be more rewarding and appreciative? Wtf

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Hmmm...I'd run through those wedding vows online and think about what you're getting into. :(

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I can assure you that it isn't the easy way out. Your fiance takes the easy way out by not supporting you any way he can and instead he is dismissive of the effort you are trying to make. You should continue on without any concern for what he has to say and instead you can hope he grows a set.

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Tell him to take out 3/4 of his stomach and see, how easy it is . Those words just make my blood boil

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My husband of 28 years isn't supportive either. Soon you will learn to ignore him. Most generally if it isn't about HIM, or it isn't HIS idea, it's wrong, so, I just ignore him. But that isn't stopping me from taking care of me. If he really loves you he will come along for the ride, and stick around just like the vows say! He is probably just worried about the risks, which, these days there are fewer than there used to be. Maybe he should have a discussion with the surgeon and voice his concerns. The surgeon can provide him with real statistics that are eye opening.

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What do you want us to say?

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Why don't you find a local support group and take him with you to one of the meetings. His lack of support could be something as simple as he isn't totally and completely informed. I have heard of many spouses that went to a support group meeting, and came out with a completely different outlook.

Just a suggestion...

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My mom said the same thing and it infuriated me at the time. I am 2 days from surgery and despite her initial attitude she plans to be there to support me through the surgery. Once he see your determination, his attitude will likely change. If not, I guess that will be a clue to kind of husband you can expect.

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I went through something similar with my fiancé and oldest daughter (she's 22).

Neither of them agreed with it and they both said the same thing "you're taking the easy way out." I proceeded and never gave them a thought. Its my health I was saving. It's the BEST thing I have ever done for myself. In the first month, I have lost 35 pounds. I'm off all medications and for the most part, I feel great!

Remember, It's YOUR body and YOUR decision. YOU have to live with yourself. There is NOTHING easy about this. It's a change that takes place from the inside out. You're mind has to be reprogramed on how you view food. You've lived your life this long eating the way you have. This is a tool that helps you reset per say, that thought process on food.

Edited by Jenn1376

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
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    • KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
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    • bellaamey

      https://alluniqueguide.com/java-burn-coffee-reviews/
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