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Surgeons weight goal a little pushy?



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I turned 18 on 10/01/1989 and weighed my highest up until that point at 118.. by the time the summer of 1990 came, 9months later, I weighed 174lbs and losing a bit less for about a year in 2008, I have never gotten lower than that.

So.. my goal was 140lbs (43 y/o, 2 kids, post menopausal)..My surgeon INSISTS on me weighing 115. Is he just being pushy or has anyone had results similar to that at all? My sister thinks I'm just scared to believe it could happen so I won't let myself go there. I am not sure, but my surgeon is unrelenting in his trying to push this 115 on me.

I just don't want to set an unreasonable goal and feel like I failed if I cannot meet it.

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How tall are you? It does seem low so perhaps somewhere in the middle makes sense, e.g. around 125. Two thoughts, health is more than just scale weight and it is just one indicator I used when setting my goal. Second, I set my own goal for the opposite reason, I thought my surgeon's goal was too high. So if setting your own goal, look several health indicators, including BMI and body fat. Make sure your BMI is under 25 which is a healthy range for your height. Also look at body fat percentage. Ideally, your body fat percentage should be under 30%.

In creating a goal, I used all of these indicators. I wanted to weight 140 lbs or less, that gave me a BMI of under 25 and I wanted a body fat percentage of 28% or less. Currently, I weight about 137 (I bounce between 134-139), my body fat is 25% and my BMI is 23.7.

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I think if you point out your apprehension,you may be able to pick something at the higher end of your healthy weight range. At 5'1, that is 115-129. So bring up 130 as a starting goal and then go from there. At my height, 5'9, mine is 149-170. My doctor said 190 and I want at least 175, so we compromised with 180 to start.

My sister thinks I'm just scared to believe it could happen so I won't let myself go there. I am not sure, but my surgeon is unrelenting in his trying to push this 115 on me.

I just don't want to set an unreasonable goal and feel like I failed if I cannot meet it.

In some ways, i think your sister could be partially correct. having been so long since being near that weight, it is new territory and that is daunting. At the very least ask about 125 as a start and I think you will be happy and surprised!

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I tend to think 115 is a little pushy. I am 5'2 and I'm maintaining at 130. It's a normal, healthy weight, and I don't feel like I have enough fat to get down to 115. Ultimately though, it doesn't hurt to humor your doctor. Just smile and nod and keep losing weight. If you get to 140 and you're happy, work on a maintenance plan. If you get to 140 and you feel like you can keep losing, go for it. In the end, the goal is whatever healthy weight you are happy at. If your surgeon and you differ by 20-25 pounds, it really doesn't matter in the grand scheme of it all. By the time you are at a point where you and your doctor's different opinions about your goal weight are really relevant to whether you stop losing weight or keep losing weight, you will likely be so happy with the results that you won't care about arguing with him.

Good luck!

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My surgeon told me that my ideal weight based on my body composition was something like 115 and I'm 5'4". That's what the fancy scale at the surgeons office computed. If I can get there, AMAZING! But my personal goal is about 25lbs more than that. It seems odd to me that your surgeon would be insistent on you being any weight considering statistically, the sleeve only averages a 50-75% weight loss. I think most surgeons are a little more conservative and realistic than yours. ????

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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