Hi All. I've had several stressful years up until now including juggling 2 full time jobs and a family. I had this surgery in December with a spleen injury complication that really slowed recovery. I'm finding it difficult to motivate myself to get stuff done at work now unless a deadline is approaching big time.

I'm not sure if I'm just burnt out, or, if I no longer have the "joy of escape" through food and alcohol that I'm not able to push so hard. Lately life feels shorter and shorter and I'm not having much fun.

Maybe since I'm beginning to feel like I'm making (potentially lasting -- finally) progress in my weight issue, my other issues are in sharper focus. In a way I feel like I'm doing personal housecleaning and I want all of the "rooms" picked up.

Anyway -- any work motivation suggestions?

Thanks.

well, let me say this and im not being mean or saying anything about you personally. but, what you're going through is something you really would have been better off working out before you had the surgery. its kind of why we do the psych thing to help you get over food being a dependency. it sounds a lot like depression from kicking the food as comfort. talk to someone. now thats just my opinion, im not doctor, but heck talking to someone couldnt hurt.

When I'm feeling blah about my job and really don't want to be there, I try (but don't always succeed) to think about making my client's day a little better by doing the best job I can. Or if that doesn't work for me, I try to think of it as.... my boss paying me to train for my next job! Seriously!

Please don't think I'm always successful at either trains of thought, sometimes they work, other times they don't.

I can completely understand. I am 2 years out on this thing and the emotional changes were no fun at all. In fact, I find that there are lots of things I just don't care about anymore. I go to work everyday and do my job but to say I really give a rip deep down would be untrue. This applies to many areas in my life. I won't bore you with the entire list but situations that used to cause me a lot of stress and worry just don't matter anymore. I've had to learn to let it go as a means of self preservation. I just don't have the room emotionally to take on a lot of problems or deal with other people's issues. While I used to try to save the world, now I take care of me and my immediate responsibilities and let the rest go. It's not necessarily a bad thing in some ways. I kind of discovered that I had been taking on too much from outside sources and honestly I'm happier now in not doing so.

Yes - of course these issues should have been dealt with pre-surgery. But if they weren't and you are dealing with them now then so be it. As long as you recognize the issue and are aware that you must deal with it then you are halfway through the battle. You got this. Just stay the course.

"Should-haves" frustrate me and feel "preachy" -- especially when it comes to dealing with life's issues. They are not supportive or constructive.

I'd have never been able to have the surgery if I thought I had to conquer all of my issues beforehand. The surgery has helped resolve several issues already. Just not this one. Yet.

Edited March 4, 201511 yr by Elizabeth21

I know how you feel!! I think a lot of it for me is two different things....First is the weather.....I am so ready for winter to be over and to see sunshine and flowers. Was snowed in all last weekend.......which if you are not careful....you get bored and want to eat.......Freezing rain today......so dreary!! The second thing is I am going to retire October 1......I am so ready.....so I have lost my passion for my work. Hang in there...you will get through it. You are just going through a lot at this time.

I am not sure if this will ring true for you - but i will share my experience. None of this came out preop because my deep emotions were largely drowned by the obesity. That lethargy and physical misery of being morbidly obese was a predominant "feeling" and alot of my other needs and feelings were not really clear and known.

when I no longer carried all that "weight" - both literally and figuratively - suddenly I had emotional space for other topics. Like, damn, am I living the life I want? Guess what - I wasn't! I didn't feel like I had much of a choice before, but now I do. I would go so far as to say I didn't even REALIZE how much I was missing out... how much the years of obesity robbed from me.

About 8 months or so post op, I went through the doldrums. My weight loss slowed alot too. I had to look deep inside and ask myself if i was content losing ALOT of weight, but still looked kinda matronly, or if I was going for "trim". I had to think hard about some of that - all irrelevant when I was super morbidly obese, but was a big issue during the journey.

I have gone through a major transformation, and much like an iceberg, the part you can see is really just the tip of it.

Thanks y'all for the suggestions. It helps to know that someone can relate!

Edited March 4, 201511 yr by Elizabeth21

@@Stevehud Clever blog name!

All day long today this exact topic has been weighing on my mind. I so badly wanted to post about it but kept chickening-out because I felt like I was being silly. I know better than to think that & I was so glad to see this thread.

Everyone keeps hitting this issue on the nail.....we no longer self-medicate with food to drown out our emotions and now we have to face them. It is not easy. It's really hard but we are stronger.

I keep a picture of the "tiny blue dot" (Earth from space) that I view every now and then to remind myself that my stuff is but a fleeting moment on Earth's time line and to not spend that time being miserable. Easier said than done especially with what's going on in my life currently.

I made a promise that with this WLS journey I will start living more. It won't make work better or solve my problems but it sure will make me much more satisfied with life.

Just wanted to stop in and give my support. In addition to the other things going on in life, most of the country is going thru a cold spell with less sunlight. That can certainly exacerbate the feelings you are talking about.

@@Elizabeth21 thank you Elizabeth.

@@Sharon1964 Yes! I definitely am missing the sun and some warmer weather! I am so glad that having lost weight, and continuing to lose more, I know that I am going to be able to enjoy the summer even more this year!!

I am still pre-op so this might not apply to you, but I spent 10 years in a weight loss 12 step program and I learned a lot there. My job is high stress but I work at home. I got so that I would do anything to avoid working, "just show up" saved my career. I made myself sit at my desk every day, turns out that I can't keep my hands off my work if I just show up.

I recently resigned from my job of 13yrs it was making me miserably negative &i didn't want that again! ! I have no Regret. .

I recently resigned from my job of 13yrs it was making me miserably negative &i didn't want that again! ! I have no Regret. .

I am planning my escape route too. Life is too short to be in a place full of misery. Best of luck!