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My husband forgot that today was my birthday; ( 36woot! I think this year I'm going to trade him in for a new one, or accidentally forget his birthday(#sorrynotsorry).Lol. I'll be ok, after all its not the first special day that he's forgotten, and it probably wont be his last. It's actually kinda a good thing he forgot it, or I'd be stuffing my face with cake right now. Sometimes I wish he was more supportive. I often find myself questioning our marriage. I used to think that the reason he doesn't take me out or spend time with me was because I'm fat. Now i just think its because he has to much on his mind and that he's just a jerk! I hate feeling like I'm disposable. Well enough about that. I'm still waiting to find out if my surgery has been approved. My doctor said it shouldn't take much longer. In the meantime he started me on a 6 week preop diet. I started yesterday. So far so good. I finally got all my testing and nutrition classes done. This year I want to focus all my attention on my kids and myself. I only want to be around people who care for me and protect me. Hopefully by next year my husband will be sold and that I will have a better birthday story to tell Sorry for rambling and all the auto corrects(typing on phone).

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I'm sorry about your bday! I guess some husbands are like that. Did your kids remember? Well Happy Birthday!!! Here's to one of the best years of your life! Maybe after your surgery you'll be able to kick him in the ass! Then maybe he'll remember!

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Thanks so much! Yes, my kids remembered to wish me happy b-day. They made me cards too. Thanks for the good laugh and making smile!

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Happy Birthday! Make it a great year! I hope things get better with your husband.

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HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!

(I think a lot of women would have liked to sell their husbands at one time or another during their marriage--me included) :lol:

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Happy Birthday...belated...some MEN...u still have time to sell him after surgery.....Good luck!!

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Happy Birthday!

I'm sorry about the way your husband treats you. I truly hope that with the surgery comes a new feeling of self worth and understanding that people are only going to treat you as badly as you allow them to. Don't accept being invisible to your husband. Let him know how it makes you feel and if possible, seek help from a pastor or therapist to make it better. You owe it to yourself and your kids. Make this the year about you being healthier, both physically and emotionally :)

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Have definitely been there. Once the in-laws were to visit and he asked he how to help. I said go downstairs and see what needs to be done.when they arrived nothing had been done. I looked at him blankly and he said, its needs to be vacuumed, dusted and the shoes put in the closet. I said my God Man, I wasnt asking for an inventory! I told my beloved MIL that gd forbid if anything should happen to this husband I wasn't getting another, I was just gonna go get me some SOME. She said, honey I hear you.

That said we just celebrated 25 years and I love him to death. But I think everyone deserves someone who loves them best in all the world. If that ain't him, you deserve better.

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I understand completely. If u read my post from a few days ago you will see why. I am also pre-op and agree support is much desired. So glad I found this forum. Since that day he is trying harder. Fingers crossed and being strong for myself.

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aaww, I'm sorry to hear your husband isn't attentive. Have you talked to him about it?

on a brighter note HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

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HAPPY BIRTHDAY you beautiful, amazing creature! 36 is a great age!

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Happy Birthday!!! This year is about you. Make it the best one yet!

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I am the queen of a very small country. It is as large as the plot of land my house sits on. I suggest that you proclaim yourself queen of your country. Give it a name. Grand ---- Whatever. Then your husband can be king of that country. It is fun being queen and king and birthdays are a cause for national celebration. My king does not need prompting to remember a national holiday, but if he did I would remind him that one (my birthday) was coming up and that he should not disappoint the people who like to have festivals. It brings the little people such joy.

My husband and I have a teriffic fantasy going ... as if you needed to have that clarified. We enjoy all the trappings of royalty since our country is surrounded by the greatest nation ever. Anyway, it is so nice not to be hounded by the paparazzi like other royalty. People leave us alone. The pesants never pester us for autographs or favors. We walk among them incognito! If you make a fun joke of a national holiday coming up, it is not like you are nagging.

I especially like those diamond commercials on TV, where they zoom in on a diamond ring so close that it looks like a crown. I always tell my husband that I want a "shiny hat" just like Queen Liz (who, incidentally serves the crummiest cucumber sandwiches at her parties) with diamonds just like on the TV - the SAME size! "THAT'S the size I want!"

And then, there is the fantasy about the Naughty Fairy...

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I too am notoriously forgetful of special dates. My wife's remedy for our wedding date was to marry me on my birthday so I wouldn't forget. Still there was one year were I nearly forgot about the anniversary. So from all us forgetful males, Happy Birthday.

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    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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