Fears, hope, thinking and more thinking

princess_sophie · May 29, 2007

Hi all,

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I’m not banded yet. I’ve been researching and researching and thinking and thinking. My insurance won’t cover it so I’ve been looking into having it done in <?xml:namespace prefix = st1 ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:smarttags" /><st1:country-region w:st="on"><st1:place w:st="on">Mexico</st1:place></st1:country-region>. I read these boards all the time and just love it. Everyone here is so supportive and honest. I feel more comfortable on these boards, even though I haven’t been banded, than I do any other weight loss/related boards.

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My biggest fear is that something will go wrong, I will have complications. The kind of complications that are worse than slippage or erosion that couldn’t be fixed by having the band removed and then I would be buried in medical bills for the rest of my life. My second fear is that if it slipped or eroded and I had to have the band removed I would have to pay for that. So even if I had it installed and removed in <st1:country-region w:st="on">Mexico</st1:country-region>, aftercare and fills, etc. in the <st1:country-region w:st="on"><st1:place w:st="on">US</st1:place></st1:country-region>, travel expenses, etc. I would still be looking at around 15,000 to 17,000. My third fear is that it won’t work for me. I won’t be able to stick to the rules and I will eat around it. I don’t think I would, but I didn’t think I would ever end up 290lbs either. My fourth fear is that I lose all my weight, things are great and then something happens and I have to have it removed and then I gain all of my weight back. My fifth fear is that if I don’t do something to change my eating and my weight I’m going to die. If I’m lucky I will have a heart attack and die instantly. If not, my health problems and complications from those health problems, will slowly get worse and I will linger around and slowly deteriorate for another 20 years. At least my insurance would pay for that though.

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Has anyone heard about The Solution by Laurel Mellin? I think she hits the nail on the head as far as the “why” and “what” needs to happen to turn off that drive to overeat. I love her program but it’s really hard to do on my own. When I am able to do the work I do feel better, more at peace, and emotionally stronger. But most of the time I feel like an alcoholic or drug addict trying to work a self-help recovery program, by myself, while still drinking/using. It just doesn’t work. I thought that if I get banded, I would be able to work this program and hopefully, hopefully, if anything happened and I had to have my band removed I wouldn’t gain the weight back and my drive to overeat would be gone. Or would I just rely on the band to lose weight, be on such an emotional high from the weight loss and not do the emotional work? Just trying to imagine living life without a constant drive to overeat and the constant worry about my weight and eating, it sounds like a fantasy.

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Sorry about the long post. I’m just thinking, thinking, thinking.

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PS

jahair · May 29, 2007

Hi all,
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I’m not banded yet. I’ve been researching and researching and thinking and thinking. My insurance won’t cover it so I’ve been looking into having it done in ffice:smarttags" />lace w:st="on">Mexico</ST1:place>. I read these boards all the time and just love it. Everyone here is so supportive and honest. I feel more comfortable on these boards, even though I haven’t been banded, than I do any other weight loss/related boards. This is a comfortable environment, I agree

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My biggest fear is that something will go wrong, I will have complications. The kind of complications that are worse than slippage or erosion that couldn’t be fixed by having the band removed and then I would be buried in medical bills for the rest of my life. I'll bet if you did a poll, everyone one of us has had the exact same fears! This your new icon...:decision: My second fear is that if it slipped or eroded and I had to have the band removed I would have to pay for that. So even if I had it installed and removed in <?xml:namespace prefix = st1 ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com<ST1Mexico</st1:country-region>, aftercare and fills, etc. in the <st1:country-region w:st="on"><ST1:place w:st="on">US</ST1:place></st1:country-region>, travel expenses, etc. I would still be looking at around 15,000 to 17,000. You know, my doc charges that amount for a (non-financed) self pay and all fills are included for at least the first year. If you are going to have to budget that much money, look around in the states again and see what you can find out. My third fear is that it won’t work for me. I won’t be able to stick to the rules and I will eat around it. I don’t think I would, but I didn’t think I would ever end up 290lbs either.Amen!! My fourth fear is that I lose all my weight, things are great and then something happens and I have to have it removed and then I gain all of my weight back. Yup, normal concerns My fifth fear is that if I don’t do something to change my eating and my weight I’m going to die. If I’m lucky I will have a heart attack and die instantly. If not, my health problems and complications from those health problems, will slowly get worse and I will linger around and slowly deteriorate for another 20 years. At least my insurance would pay for that though. Now you've gone to the "dark side"!

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Has anyone heard about The Solution by Laurel Mellin? I think she hits the nail on the head as far as the “why” and “what” needs to happen to turn off that drive to overeat. I love her program but it’s really hard to do on my own. Not familiar with the program, but any program is hard to work on your own. When I am able to do the work I do feel better, more at peace, and emotionally stronger. But most of the time I feel like an alcoholic or drug addict trying to work a self-help recovery program, by myself, while still drinking/using. Excellent description! Many of us are lone rangers and all we really succeed in doing is just getting deeper into our heads. It just doesn’t work. I thought that if I get banded, I would be able to work this program and hopefully, hopefully, if anything happened and I had to have my band removed I wouldn’t gain the weight back and my drive to overeat would be gone. Or would I just rely on the band to lose weight, be on such an emotional high from the weight loss and not do the emotional work? Just trying to imagine living life without a constant drive to overeat and the constant worry about my weight and eating, it sounds like a fantasy. From where you are right now, it does sound like a fantasy, but it will require action to make it reality. And it will take a leap of faith to move to action. You can never think and plan for every eventuality that MIGHT occur. I think the most you can do is collect information/data that can help you make a decision; look around for a support network to cheer you on after you have the surgery (If you look on the state boards, there may be a support group that meets near you), and be willing to get additional help when needed if you find the "head hunger" overrules the "body hunger".

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Sorry about the long post. I’m just thinking, thinking, thinking. Thinking is good, but stewing will only just make you feel more anxious. Check in here again when you get caught up the thought-anxiety bandwagon.

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PS

Best of luck,

Jo Ann

WASaBubbleButt · May 29, 2007

Mexico is an excellent place to have surgery as long as you do your research and choose a good surgeon. You can't beat the prices. They have less overhead and they can charge less. There are some fine and skilled surgeons there.

As for your worries and concerns, we ALL had those. That's part of it.

Insurance... if you have a medical emergency (such as erosion) your insurance will cover it.

Let's say you have a slip, my doc charges his own patients $3500 to repair a slip or remove a band. It's more for people that he didn't place their band. Most quality surgeons in Mexico will charge their cost to repair or remove a band on patients where they originally placed the band.

And finally, your compulsion to overeat... I am a believer that until there is a cure for this issue, the compulsion will always be there. My doc claims it will never go away. Some disagree. Just don't "bank" on that compulsion going away, there is nothing to show (regarding studies) that it will leave someday.

LLSibley · May 29, 2007

I had my surgery in :Monterrey Mexico with Dr. Zapata for $7000. I was very pleased with it and had no complications. I know a girl who had it here in the states and had severe complications so doing it in the US can't guareentee no complications. Don't let that statement scare you because the same girl had severe complications having a c-section during childbirth. I've read that only2-3% of the people have complications. I went throught Ready4Achange.com and was really pleased with my whole procedure. My problem was finding a doctor around here to do fills so check into that before going to Mexico.

princess_sophie · May 29, 2007

thanks for everyones reply. It really does help to not feel so alone.

I feel like I may need to clarify where I'm getting the 15,000 to 17,000. Of course these are all rough estimates.

$8,500 surgery in Mexico, $1,500 travel expenses for me and my mom, $2,000 to pay US doctor to take me on as a patient for after care. $300-$400 per fill, if I had 4 fills at $400 a piece that would $1,600. $2,000 to have it removed, plus another 1,500 for travel expenses. That's a grand total of $17,100.

If I had it done locally it's $17,500, and that includes one year of after care and fills. But after that it's $300 a fill and I'm not sure how much it would cost if I had to have it taken out. So if I needed more fills after the first year and I needed to have it removed I would probably be looking at, I don't know, $20,000 to $25,000.

Either way, if I get the band or I don't get the band, I wish I could work the solution program and get the freedom from food and weight obsession. But is that possible? Or is that just a pipe dream.

conniecash · May 29, 2007

I had the same fears you have. I worried about everything that could and might go wrong. I even was afraid I would die from the surgery. I have had only 2 surgeries in my life and I am 50. Both were c-sec from child birth and I had to do it. This has been the best thing I have ever done for myself. It was not a big deal....the only real pain I had was from the gas. I feel great and now I don't overeat, and I don't want to.

I had to self pay $15,000. It took all our savings but it will save my life.

As you get older and go through menopause the weight will go up and up. I didn't no if it would stop or if I was going to be a 500lb woman. My best advice is to find a good Dr. and one that does this type of surgery only, call his office and talk to a nurse. I talked to several nurses at first and I could tell if the Dr. had some experience or alot. I wanted someone that could do lapband in his sleep. Take baby steps until you feel comfortable. It took me a year to finally do it but now I am so happy I did it.