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Unfortunately I have to travel 3 1/2 hours each visit to the center and my surgeon so not possible for them all to fo

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Well, this is not about them. It's about you. Would they say you are taking the easy way out to deliver a baby at the hospital, or to have a broken leg set? Now is a good time to remove all of their junk foods out of the house. If they really want to support you and expect you to eat healthy, then by golly, they should set the example for you, eh? So.....broccoli and baked chicken for dinner tomorrow?

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Ok. My eldest son just came at me with this!!! "It'll be just like you are starving yourself to death!!" Oh my gosh!!!!! He knows soo much!!(sarcasm!!!) I really need to find him some information that he will accept as fact!

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@@allyray You could show him this website with the 10000's + And assure him that we are not all starving! ;)

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I've asked him but he's stubborn. I will still get the surgery and he will be fine!

Thanks for all the advice.

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My mother was the one person who simply didn't understand my choice of WLS. Mind you I'm 62 and she's 84 so some things never change LOL

I told her that while I appreciated her concern, my doctors were the ones with the medical expertise to best advise me. My surgeon, endocrinologist and pulminologist all agreed this was the best course of action for my health. In fact my PCP had the VSG last February.

I'm 2 weeks out from surgery and now that all is said and done she has accepted my choice and does in fact see the benefits. I came home off all diabetes meds and haven't had to restart them! Even she can't argue with that ????

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My boys were late teens/early 20s at time of my sleeve. I informed them of what I was doing, i know they were terrified, but we didn't discuss all that much.

Now, 3 years later, I showed them a before picture and they tell me they don't even remember me looking that way and didn't realize how big I was. It was actually very emotional for me to watch their faces as they looked at that picture and tried to make sense of what they were seeing and what to say. shock, disbelief, sorrow and many other emotions crossed their young faces as they looked at me in person - a normal size woman and tried to imagine that I was ever in the 300#++ weight class.

The fear and worry are long forgotten and what they see now is a middle aged mom who looks and feels better than they ever remember seeing me! They both tell me that I seem so much younger, happier, funner, less prone to anger or negativivity - just better.

My youngest son who is prone to "chunky" has drastically improved his eating and slimmed down over those 3 years too.

I am not sure how you should proceed from here with your sons - but truth of the matter is there is no way that an athletic teenage boy can understand what you are facing and before you know it they will be moving on to college or whatever life brings and you will either still be obese... or living the life you want.

Edited by CowgirlJane

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Teenagers, who have likely never struggled with anything in their lives, have no idea what the reality of being obese is. It is so easy to say you should be able to do this with diet and exercise, and you probably could lose it, but statistics say you will gain your loss, and then some, back.

Honestly, they are kids, quit discussing your decisions with them. I also have kids, 19, 12, and 1. I explained what I was doing, and followed that up with, if you cannot be supportive, I do not want to hear your opinion. I will answer any questions, but no negativity. This is not an easy decision, or an easy fix. Of course they love you, but are likely still in the smindset that you exist to care for them, so the idea that you are doing something that may affect their day to day, probably scares them. They will be happy you did it when it is all said and done!

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One of the key aspects of my decision to have the surgery was in the research presented at the information session I went to. For morbidly obese people like ourselves, statistics show that diet and exercise end up working long term about 10 percent of the time.. People almost always regain the weight plus some. The statistics also show that with Bariatric surgery, morbidly obese patients are successful 90 percent of the time and are able to keep the weight off the rest of their lives. Most gained about 20 pounds from their initial weight loss amount. (Which is nothing compared to where we're at now lol.)

I'm 51 and have a BMI of 45. In 2013 I started running and was able to complete a couple of 5k runs. Of course for me it was walking and running, but I still did it. I felt better but it was difficult at my size on my bones and joints and it was so discouraging to work so hard and lose only about 5 lbs.

At my age and weight, I consider this life-saving surgery.

My opinion is that you tell the boys that you have heard and appreciate their concerns for you. That you really need support at this time because you have made your decision and it is final. They can help you to be successful and to have a positive attitude or they can choose to tear you down. I suggest you ask them to support you and tell them if they can't do that at least don't tear you down or make it more difficult for you than it already is.

I would also suggest strapping 150 pounds to their back and telling them to walk around with it all day and see how fun it is.

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    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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