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If you weren't obese "all" of your life, what is it that caused you to become obese ?



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I was 100 pounds after I had all 3 children I gave birth at 115 pounds. My children have never been a factor. I had so many heavy people in my family i was frantic about not becoming one cuz of genetics. In my late 30s I was brutally raped in front of my children in my home by a stranger in let in to use the phone. After that I went up and down with my weight if men hit on me I would gain weight. I would get less attention feel safe. And lose it again this was a back and forth thing. Then my brother was killed by a drunk driver and in the same week my father-in-law shot himself I found him! That was it i quit my job and for a year I did nothing but sit on the couch I got huge. I lost the weight in 2013 down 130 pounds kept in off for a year drinking Medifast shakes only 500 calories a day. When I stopped I gained it all back and more. So here I am. I lost 40 pounds in 4 months pre-op and my Dr questioned if I really needed surgery. I told him I am great a starving myself but I can't keep it off it just isn't realistic. So answer is no most my life I was thin because I was obsessed with staying thin.

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I was 100 pounds after I had all 3 children I gave birth at 115 pounds. My children have never been a factor. I had so many heavy people in my family i was frantic about not becoming one cuz of genetics. In my late 30s I was brutally raped in front of my children in my home by a stranger in let in to use the phone. After that I went up and down with my weight if men hit on me I would gain weight. I would get less attention feel safe. And lose it again this was a back and forth thing. Then my brother was killed by a drunk driver and in the same week my father-in-law shot himself I found him! That was it i quit my job and for a year I did nothing but sit on the couch I got huge. I lost the weight in 2013 down 130 pounds kept in off for a year drinking Medifast shakes only 500 calories a day. When I stopped I gained it all back and more. So here I am. I lost 40 pounds in 4 months pre-op and my Dr questioned if I really needed surgery. I told him I am great a starving myself but I can't keep it off it just isn't realistic. So answer is no most my life I was thin because I was obsessed with staying thin.

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This breaks my heart. Sending hugs to you.

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Thank you. I will be me again very soon the psychologist and psychiatrist are a bit worried how I will respond to men once I lose the weight because I have it in my head that I'm older now. At any rate I will continue to see both the psychologist and psychiatrist after.

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Thank you. I will be me again very soon the psychologist and psychiatrist are a bit worried how I will respond to men once I lose the weight because I have it in my head that I'm older now. At any rate I will continue to see both the psychologist and psychiatrist after.

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-G930A using the BariatricPal App

I am a firm believer in using every resource available. I am glad to hear you have a mental health team to work with.

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Edited by onehappychick

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These stories ring a bell for me.

Amazing how life, jobs, kids, yucky marriages, end up with poundage on our bodies. I'm just so glad to be done with the part of that cycle of useless dieting and gaining

And now feel (fairly ) successful with living at a decent weight.

27 bmi. Perfect? It is for me, not by some outdated charts. I'm thrilled to live fairly easily at this size and weight and my clothes in my closet fit for once ( instead of range of sizes before)

I get after all these years I won't be a size 8 ever and I'm ok with 10-12.

I am just making peace with what I have and going on.

I don't want to ever feel that struggle of not feeling "good enough"

Someone quoted living your "best "life ... One you are happy with and can maintain. Apparently this is where my body will be

Thank you WLS

A BMI of 27, size 8, and being happy with your body sounds like success to me!!! A huge congratulations to you!!!

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Three kids, a complete hysterectomy at 32, and husband's infidelity (we worked through it) - all of these have wreaked havoc on my mind and body. I went from a healthy 110 to 240. Some of that weight gain was gradual, and not all my baby weight came off after each child. Most of my issues came after the hysterectomy, but I was covered with endometriosis so being in pain or gaining weight...not a hard choice. But, with the weight gain came other complications: high BP, swollen calves/ankles, more frequent Migraines. Job stress should be included in this mix as well as it did not help. I was a branch manager for a staffing agency during this time too. I lost weight on a doctor-monitored program (that included pills). Once the pills stopped working, the weight stopped coming off. I packed on the last 50 pounds in 6 months. Everything hurt. This surgery has been a gift from God. I'm only 54 pounds down so far, but just getting back under 200 has done wonders for my health (and state of mind). I know I won't be back to my little 110 lb self, but I also don't EVER want to get up over 200 again. My little bones have hated me for the past few years - they need relief!

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Plain lack of education on my part and really trying. Everyone in my family is on the big boned side. But there are also lots of health issues. When both my parents passed away within 3 years of each other, that was the wake up call for me. Only in my 40's at the time, already seeing a cardiologist??

Got the lab band, lost 70 lbs, now trying to keep them off, you know how it goes sometimes. 2 steps forward, 1 step back. but I still have kept most of it off. Plus I have joined Planet Fitness and have been committed to going at least 4 times a week if not more, and I go on weekends. It has also inspired my daughter who's weight was starting to go up to start a gym, she has lost 40 lbs in 6 months,

At a family bbq, my cousin pointed at me and said you are going to eat a piece of cake, so you don't forget where you came from. (all in jest)..

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
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    • KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
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      https://alluniqueguide.com/java-burn-coffee-reviews/
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