female only Jeans or a dress?

[Inner Surfer Girl 12,015]

Well date was fun! dinner and talk then dancing. I wound up in skinny jeans because I just decided that it fit the setting better and rain was forecast ,(though it was dry) and we planned to walk from place to place. We didn't like the band at the blues place so mostly were at a dive bar that had a heavy metal cover band..loud! I was better dressed than 98 percent even in my jeans so it was a good call.

We hit it off but I realized that part of it is that he reminds me of someone I still carry a little flame for.

Anyway, good start!

I am in the mindset to not "miss" opportunities if someone appeals to me and is expressing interest. That was the big deal for me - how to meet people more "organically" and have it actually lead to a date or social event. I am pleased how this turned out so I feel like that is the better path for me over online dating.

Sounds like a great evening!

This reminds me of the book title "Do What You Love and the Money Will Follow". You can change this to do what you love and love (or friendship, or happiness, or whatever you want) will follow.

I can't wait to get my life back . In the meantime I'll live vicariously through your adventures!

Thank you for so honestly sharing your breakthroughs and challenges.

[CowgirlJane 14,261]

Your reply is interesting because the longer I am in maintenance the more I think about trying to change to living the life I want. Obesity was the "elephant in the room" and now that's in control I am peeling away alot of other layers I want to change. I at times have a twinge of regret I am so old but mostly I am grateful that I have this chance.

[Jersrose43 837]

Glad to hear it went great!

[NavyMom2006 119]

@@CowgirlJane - you're never too old. My late mother-in-law eloped at 83!!! Glad you had fun on your date!

[bikrchk 1,313]

Amen to no "missed" opportunities! My fav quote right now is, "You'll miss 100% of the chances you don't take". And I'm also trying to maximize my opportunities to meet people "organically". I Never turn down a social opportunity these days, but have had limited luck with meeting people "organically". Still doing the on-line thing. LOTS of first dates! One last week and 3 scheduled in the next 2 days. The 2 today are back to back riding dates which I would be doing anyway on a beautiful day like today. My other favorite quote is, "If you're looking for your soulmate, stop. They will be waiting for you when you start doing the things you love"! Seems like that's exactly what you were doing when you met this guy, horse in tow! THAT gives me hope! Anyway, until he falls into my lap, I guess I'll keep trying to maximize my chances to meet people on all fronts! And now, I must go change into skinny jeans and tall boots for a full day of riding.. :-)

Well date was fun! dinner and talk then dancing. I wound up in skinny jeans because I just decided that it fit the setting better and rain was forecast ,(though it was dry) and we planned to walk from place to place. We didn't like the band at the blues place so mostly were at a dive bar that had a heavy metal cover band..loud! I was better dressed than 98 percent even in my jeans so it was a good call.

We hit it off but I realized that part of it is that he reminds me of someone I still carry a little flame for.
Anyway, good start!

I am in the mindset to not "miss" opportunities if someone appeals to me and is expressing interest. That was the big deal for me - how to meet people more "organically" and have it actually lead to a date or social event. I am pleased how this turned out so I feel like that is the better path for me over online dating.

[CowgirlJane 14,261]

I did alot of first dates online too. Had a couple of guys I even saw for a few weeks etc. I am not entirely certain why I really didn't like it, but most of the time I would not want to see them again. Boring, weird, or just not quite right.... how about the guy that 10-15 minutes in pulls out a deck of personality cards and proceeds to give me a personality test. Of course I gave false answers since no way I want to date someone who does THAT weirdness in the first few minutes... I feel like I managed to connect (ie ones with 2-3 dates) that just had issues. Hell, I have issues but please be over your ex, and not full of dread of women while you also pursue a relationship. Anyway, I know there are great guys out there too, but the whole online thing just put the wrong filters on for me.

I feel like meeting someone face to face is more natural to me. My "attraction" or interest in them is the whole package, stuff you can't see from a photo.

More importantly, I am practicing social skills. I figured out what I was doing to keep from getting asked out. As soon as I recognized it, things have really changed.

I went out Sat night with my meetup group - dressed the same as always (although i did figure out a new make up trick or two) and everyone wanted to dance with me, buy me drinks and ask me out. I didn't want to see any of them, but suddenly it is like i have found the "key" - haha! So, I am practicing this social skills.

One of my girlfriends told me that her number one mistake is she waited to be chosen... instead, I am much more actively engaged in "choosing" who I want to see.

[jessiquoi 623]

@@CowgirlJane, you are never too old. i think the older we get, the better we are at relationships regardless of our weight, just because we're more experienced and wiser. i always hoped but never expected i would find such a satisfying relationship at my age (i'm 57 and we met last year in April). and, we met online.

i've been online dating for 10 yrs since i left my husband, and although i always prefer meeting someone organically (ratio of organic:online relationships in 10 yrs = 2:3), online dating has been one venue that i would suggest keeping open. you never know who you're going to meet. i found the key is being incredibly honest in your profile... so honest that you would turn off anyone who isn't going to be in to you. anyway, it worked for me.

i'm glad you had fun! before i met John, dating was my favorite hobby.