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I think I messed up.....



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I had my sleeve done on 7/31/14 and the first few days of being home after the surgery and smelling the food that my husband started making the kids for dinner at night, really made me depressed thatI couldn't share it with them. I got to the point that I was actually letting my son's goldfish crackers melt in my mouth so that I had something other than Jello, gatorade, Water, and assorted juices. I then moved on to having Peanut Butter filled pretzles melt in my mouth just so I could get Protein and start to feel some energy. Since then I have sort of moved onto Phase 2 foods and am thinking that I might have messed up. I don't feel any discomfort, just in the beginning when I swallow....it almost feels like gas pains. I know that I was told to be on Clear liquids for 2 weeks, but now that I had a taste of mashed potatoes, I don't want to go back. Did I completely mess everything up? I am my own worst enemy.

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I can't answer that, especially since I'm pre-op. However, at the nutritional meetings, I was told that the surgeon has people eat mushy foods almost immediately. Different doctors have different instructions. So, it may not be as bad as you think!

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WLS Success is 10% physical 90% mental. It's up to you to decide if you want to succeed. No one can do it for you. And if you are looking for someone to tell you it's OK to ignore you're surgeon's instructions....sorry, that is not something I can do. If you don't care about risks and complications, then there's nothing I can say to change your actions.

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I was at creamed Soups on my 2nd week. But I would be more worried about why you jumped ahead. Remember its only for a short time your on liquids. You CAN do this! Get back on track and follow your plan. You'll do great!

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The reason for the various stages is to allow your new tummy and more importantly staple line to heal. Moving through stages too quickly or before that line has had proper time to heal you can risk leakage, and even stretching of staples which can lead to ulcers. There's a post op plan for a reason, it's not to deprive you, it's to prevent complications.

The number on reason for WLS complications is patients not following post op instructions. I'm not saying you've messed anything up, but I'd get back on track with the instructions you have been given. Again to allow everything to heal.

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Nobody can make you do anything.

This is all up to you.

What do you want to do?

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I'm still pre-op, but I totally agree with Kindel. Regardless of what other doctors plans may be, your doctor gave you a specific plan and you need to evaluate why you are unable to keep on track. Talk to your NUT and get back on track.

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My surgeon said that the main people who get leaks (not all of course) are the ones that don't follow the post op nutrition instructions. You are an adult and only you can control what you put in you mouth.

Just remember... Currently your stomach is swollen and healing. Your body tells you things. You said you have pain when you swallow. Here's your body giving you a sign...

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Thank you for all of the support/tough love. Being a food addict is what got me to this point to begin with. I want to be here for my kids graduation and after 3 years of pros/cons debates, going to seminars, going to therapy sessions, having friends who have gone through it, I finally made my mind up to go ahead with it. I'm not looking for anyone to tell me to go against what my surgeon told me to do. That is the last thing I would ever do. I was just nervous and scared that I had really done something wrong to really hurt myself. Now I know to take it slow again, get back on track, and let this phase take it's course. I know I can do this, it's just that when you are addicted to something, stopping cold turkey isn't the easiest way to deal with the addiction. I think I may need to go back to my therapist for some professional help on this.

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Glad you're getting some help. We all have our challenges.

But please stick to your surgeon's plan. It's there for a very important reason. Your tummy isn't going to feel any pain at this point. Your diet is designed to allow your tummy to heal properly and to prevent a leak.

Please be safe, and keep following your plan. I know you'll do great :-)

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I agree -- let your therapist help / support you through these gigantic life / eating / food / other changes you're making right now.

I'll tell you what my therapist would do if I'd had that particular slip-up: He'd have had me writing all that down in my "Monitoring Problem Eating Volume and Type" diary:

Date

Time

food

Too much? Y/N

Problem food type? Y/N

Situation

Feeling (you know -- the real ones)

Other notes

And then we'd look for "compulsive" behaviors I have built to manage specific feelings / situations.

This stuff isn't rocket science. It's just a LOT of hard work -- noticing the behaviors, finding the patterns in the behaviors, building new responses and behaviors that are healthy, not old unhealthy ones.

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Why not time it so you take a walk around the time your husband is cooking for the kids? Get out of the house. You gotta do what you gotta do for you. No use sitting around having the sads. So if you know he is cooking at 6pm, fill a bottle of Water or G2 or something and walk to the park. People watch in the town square. Window shop, whatever it is that removes you from the situation for a bit until you can control your urges.

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I'm really glad you've come up with a plan to slow down your phases and to see your therapist. No this process is not easy. I would venture to guess that most of us are food addicts. I know I certainly am... I've lost 156 lbs and I still consider myself a food addict.

You are among friends who will tell it to you straight, so you don't hurt yourself and you can reach you goals. It is not always what you want to hear on this site, but what you need to hear... You CAN do this :-) we are here routing for you!!!

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Hi Noelle610....we are surgery date buddies! My doc told me if at anytime I feel I do something that may get me off track, to go back a step. I understand that this is hard. I was the eat meals and then eat bowels of Cereal and other Snacks between meals (which was just unhealthy trash) I don't have children yet, but the reason for my surgery is so that I can live life to its fullest and take care of myself to the best of my ability. My best friend, mother of my nephews, died 4 years ago from heart failure. She didn't have a choice, but I do and I would hate to not be around for my family just because I couldn't put the food down and get busy doing something else. I will be thinking of you as this is tough for us, but we can be strong and male it through this :)

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
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    • KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
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      https://alluniqueguide.com/java-burn-coffee-reviews/
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