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Psychological insecurity



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I posted on the pre surgery forum but I wanted to post here to see if anyone has shared these feelings. I spent one and a half years trying to get approved. I finally was and my surgery is 9/3. I know that I am an emotional eater to stop feelings of emptiness or other feelings. I was initially thrilled with the surgery date but now I have come upon something else. I now feel that my obese body was a shield, some kind of protection for me. Now that I am going to be thinner my anxiety is that I will have those same feelings but nothing like I had to "protect" me. I hid behind fat. I wonder who I will even be after losing weight. Has anyone out there had anything similar to these feelings? I am getting more and more anxious about it all. I do see a therapist and will talk about it but if any of you have dealt with this it sure would help me. Thanks.

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I can't wait to be on the other side. The only thing I'm worried about is my husband. They say a lot of people after wls become more social. I'm hoping he can keep up or doesn't become jealous.

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I posted on the pre surgery forum but I wanted to post here to see if anyone has shared these feelings. I spent one and a half years trying to get approved. I finally was and my surgery is 9/3. I know that I am an emotional eater to stop feelings of emptiness or other feelings. I was initially thrilled with the surgery date but now I have come upon something else. I now feel that my obese body was a shield, some kind of protection for me. Now that I am going to be thinner my anxiety is that I will have those same feelings but nothing like I had to "protect" me. I hid behind fat. I wonder who I will even be after losing weight. Has anyone out there had anything similar to these feelings? I am getting more and more anxious about it all. I do see a therapist and will talk about it but if any of you have dealt with this it sure would help me. Thanks.

Are you sure you're not a mind reader? Because I'm feeling just the same as you about my fat shield. 100 extra lbs and a sarcastic attitude kept everyone away so I couldn't get hurt. But I finally got to the point where my "protection" was literally killing me and it had to go!

Please keep working with your therapist on this. A great therapist has helped me tremendously with this issue and I hope yours will help you too! Message me if you'd like to talk :)

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
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    • KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
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      https://alluniqueguide.com/java-burn-coffee-reviews/
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