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My Mom has cancer



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I was banded in Sept. 06. I feel I have been doing very well and have lost 52 pounds. My sister called me last week and told me that mam has stomach cancer. they went to see the oncologist yesterday. He says without chemo she has 3 to 6 months, with chemo 9 months.

My mother is 80 years old with a myriad of other health issues. I know that I have been blessed to have her in my life for the past 42 years. Many people, my DH included, have had their mother around for a lot less time.

I have always been a stress eater. I am craving sugar like I never have before. I have always been a chocolate eater and feel like diving into a bag of m&m's and coming up for air sometime nest month. I have tried to keep busy and exercise and stay away from the sugar, but whenever I stop I can hear it calling my name. Does anyone have any ideas on what else I can do to stay away from those evil things that slip through my band with amazing ease?

Lynne:think

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Awwww I am so sorry, you are having to go through this. I know it is eventually in my own future, and I have no idea how I will cope.

All I can suggest at this point, is , come here, and write it out. Let all the feelings and emotions, and cravings out by typing them.

I'm sorry I have no magic answers. Are you going to be able to go and spend some time with your Mom?

If ever you need to talk---look me up, I will PM you my #.

((((hugs)))) I really am sorry....

Kat

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Lynne,

I am sooo sorry to hear of your mom = you are right -it doesn't matter how long we've had our parents -it is always devastating to hear that they are sick and heartbreaking to hear of her cancer. I'm sending you a big hug.

Gosh and if a few m&m's help - so be it - i think we have to look at the big picture here. But since you've been banded awhile my guess is you've had other emotional upsets (probably not at this level) and you've had to soothe yourself in other ways so maybe try to do other things to deal with this stress and grief. I like to journal, sit outside in nature, cry, scream, get my nails done - i don't mean to sound trivial as i know you are in a crisis but you have to be strong to deal with what's ahead and I'm betting you have a well of strength to draw on - just try to be open to other ways/things besides food.< /p>

most of all take care of yourself and your family = good luck! mary

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My mother has survived stomach cancer 3 times after the docs didn't give her long. She has now been cancer free for 8 years.

Keep the faith and enjoy every day you have with your mom.

My prayers are with you and your family

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Lynne,

I am so sorry to hear about your mom. I have no answers for you except to talk on the forum here as much as you need to.

My thoughts and prayers are with you.

Sallie

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Spend time with your mum. Talk to her. You will discover that there is much that you will want to know about your family history and about how her life was when she was young. My mum died two years ago. I miss being able to ask her questions about her life. Maybe you and your kids/grandkids can figure out some way to video some of these sessions. Don't spend this time mourning her death for you will have ample time later. Enjoy this window of time which is available to you. All best from me.

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<p>lynne, </p> <p>I WENT THRU WHAT YOU ARE GOING THRU WITH YOUR MOM THE ONLY THING IS THAT IT WAS MY GODMOTHER AND TO ME SHE WAS MY SECOND MOM MY ROOMATE MY EVERYTHING MY BEST FRIEND :lol: . WHEN THEY TOLD US SHE HAD ONLY 3-6 MONTHS AND SHE WAS GONE IN 1 MONTH 1 WEEK . I TOOK CARE OF HER ON THE WEEKENDS AND EVENINGS AND ITS SOMETHING VERY VERY HARD TO DEAL WITH . food WAS MY PRIORITY BACK THEN I DINT HAVE THE BAND . MY ADVICE TO U ITS TO MAKE A JOURNAL CRY WHEN YOU WANT AND LET IT OUT . FOOD WILL NOT COPE WITH THE PAIN BUT THERE ARE OUT THERE OTHERS THAT UNDERSTAND YOUR PAIN AND WILL HELP YOU GET THRU WITH IT . HAVE COURGE OVER ALL MOM WOULD WANT YOU TO BE HAPPY .</p> <p> </p> <p>IF YOU NEED ANYTHING LET ME KNOW . I WENT INTO A LOT OF CHATS AND THAT HELP ME A LOT FOUND SOMEONE THAT WAS GOING THRU THE SAME THING AND SHE WAS WAY OLDER THAN ME AND GAVE ME LOTS OF ADVICE. IN THAT FACTOR I GAINED 25 POUNDS IN THREE MONTH I HAD MY SIATICAL NERVE PINCHED AND DEPRETION TO THE MAX . I COULD BE HONEST THAT WAS ALMOST 3 YEARS AGO AND I DINT GET OVER IT WILL NEVER BUT DEALTE WITH IT UNTIL LAST YEAR.</p> <p> </p> <p>BEST LUCK TO YOU AND MY HEART AND PRAYERS ARE WITH YOU AND YOUR LOVE ONES YOUR NOT ALONE AND DONT LET FOOD BE YOU RIGHT HAND LET GOD BE YOUR RIGHT HAND AND OTHERS THAT CARE FOR YOUR HEALTH . </p> <p> </p> <p> </p> <p>CLAU<img src="http://www.LapBandTalk.com/images/smilies/clap2.gif" border="0" alt="" title="Clap2" smilieid="217" class="inlineimg" /></p>

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Thank You all for your thoughts and prayers. My mother and My brother are going to come to Texas from Iowa next month. I was able to get the month of July (earlier if she starts having problems) off so I can take my kids( girls 3 & 5 ) up to Iowa then too.

I wish my kids could have more of a chance to know her. She is a wise, generous, courageous, and caring women.

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hey lynne,

do you think you could make some audio/video tapes of your mom - maybe something you can share with your children when they are older? I made some tapes of my grandparents a long time ago and they are so treasured now. take care

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My dad had bowel cancer as well. He has passed away already and I know how this can really affect your weight. Be strong and enjoy everylast minute you have with her. We were told my father had 3 months to live and he lived almost three years. I dont think doctors can really say how long exactly some one has to live. As for your eating I think it is really important to let all your emotions and thoughts out if you bottle them up inside your gona want comfort food, so talk to a close friend of family member or jump on here and let it all out. I will pray for you and your family.

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My Mom died last Wednesday. Instead of 3 to 6 months, she made 6 weeks. She died in her sleep. My sister was with her and was holding her hand. She said it was very peaceful. I miss her very much.

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