I have really fallen off the wagon...help!

[Awesomassager 0]

Sleeve was done November 2011. Biggest wait was 288. Smallest weight 160. Current weight 205. My mom passed away on April 3, 2012. Since then I don't care anymore! On depression & anxiety meds eat and drink whatever I want. No one else in my family understands the surgery like my mom did ( she had the bypass). How the hell do I get back on track. I have now admitted I have issues and seen nutritionist but she won't help until I get my depression under control. I have tried talking to 2 other therapists and felt so stupid talking to them. It was like they didn't care and could help, so I stopped seeing them. The nutritionist referred me to a therapist they have in the office. Haven't been to any support groups, nor was I really told about them. Feel like surgery was done and then the office and doctor was done with me. Am I just making excuses... Why have I messed everything up...?

[lsereno 2,525]

You can't hate yourself thin. Continue working on getting a therapist. In the meantime, if there is a face to face support group you can attend, go to it.

• Start weighing yourself at the same time of day, once per day, or once per week.
• Log your food and your Water. Try to get 64 oz. of fluids a day in non-calorie drinks. To do so, set a schedule, such as 1 cup before Breakfast, another 2 cups before lunch, 3 cups before dinner and 2 cups after dinner.
• Clear the crap food out of your house. Give it away or throw it away, just get rid of it.
• Stock up on healthy food you enjoy. Measure and weigh your food before eating.
• Buy yourself something fun. If you don't have much money, then go to the dollar store and buy something there.
• Write some notes to yourself about why you deserve to be healthy and fit. put them where you will see them often.
• Post here in the Veterans Group. You are not alone.

Lynda

[Beach Lover 1,084]

Hang in there!! You just had a major loss in your life!! My mother passed away a year ago and I gained 10 pounds on top of what I already weighed which prompted me to do the surgery. I had thought about it for several years and finally came to the conclusion that I couldn't do this on my own. LIfe is always going to throw crap at us and we have to bounce back once we have landed from the devastation. You are reaching out and that is the first step to taking care of yourself. I would suggest that you do at least a week of the liquid diet again just to withdraw from the carb monster if that is a problem. It is hard to do but it will release you from the addiction. Once you begin seeing a loss again you will begin to feel stronger and more in charge. Most of us never felt in charge of our weight before the surgery. Remember your tool is still there and ready to help you. Stay on the forum for support!! It has always helped me when I felt weak. If you haven't tried Premier Protein shakes I suggest you give them a try. They really are good and you can get them at Sam's and Costo. You can also try to kick start the loss with the 5:2 diet. If you search it on the forum you will find info on it as well as google it. I truly wish you the very best and I am sending you a hug!!!

Edited June 18, 2014 by Beach Lover

[NotChubby4Long 8]

Don't give up! Perhaps if there is a support group in your area that you can attend it would be helpful. Perhaps someone there might have a therapist that they can recommend. We all have had set backs. You have come too far to give up! You have taken the first step by posting here and asking for help/support. If you didn't care or didn't want to get back on track then you wouldn't have even logged on! You are on your way to getting back on track and you didn't even realize it! Try going back to subbing a meal a day with a Protein drink. You can do this!!

[MichelleInCA 22]

If you're having depression, perhaps you needs to see a psychiatrist, to be evaluated for medication? I can say getting on the right meds can really help, by reducing those very dark periods where you feel hopeless about your present and future. When you're feeling more hopeful, it will be easier to get back on a plan. JMO.

Edited June 18, 2014 by MichelleInCA

[mrsbailey921 117]

i too say HANG IN THERE!!! you lost one of the people you loved the most--this time is extremely difficult. do NOT give up on yourself. please continue to look for the mental health help that you need...until you get yourself together mentally you are going to struggle physically. there are other excellent suggestions here as well--but please continue to look for professional mental health help.

[2Big2Skate 328]

My wife is on anxiety meds and they make her put on weight like mad. Ask your prescribing doc if that's a side effect of yours and see if there is another variety you can take? I know they're very hard to get off of and change. And it sounds like you need them. If you must be on them, you'll have to work them into your lifestyle. Research how they work chemically and see if you can't make some nutritional changes to minimize their weight gaining side effects. And try to get off them when the time is right.

You've been through a lot, but you can do this. Tell the people closest to you how much you need them. People react poorly to friends and family with depression. They just don't know what to do. Tell them what you need and forgive their dumb reactions.

[swimbikerun 1,041]

It isn't your fault. After care is not something I'm finding that surgeons' want to deal with. I am starting to hear it more and more. It includes weight gain but also in cases where you have problems.

I'd say listen to the good advice here and see what you can do with it, what would help me. Let me commend you for your strength and character in seeking help. You recognize that you are worth helping. That is a huge step. Keep thinking about that and fighting for you.

[BeagleLover 1,020]

I suggest finding the nearest bariatric hospital or Center of Excellence and ask about their support groups. Both pre- and post- Ops attend. Mine has one every month. It's free. We've been told that the people who keep attending the support group do the best in the long run.

I think it would help to just be around other people and help keep yourself on track.

[freezepop 13]

Sleeve was done November 2011. Biggest wait was 288. Smallest weight 160. Current weight 205. My mom passed away on April 3, 2012. Since then I don't care anymore! On depression & anxiety meds eat and drink whatever I want. No one else in my family understands the surgery like my mom did ( she had the bypass). How the hell do I get back on track. I have now admitted I have issues and seen nutritionist but she won't help until I get my depression under control. I have tried talking to 2 other therapists and felt so stupid talking to them. It was like they didn't care and could help, so I stopped seeing them. The nutritionist referred me to a therapist they have in the office. Haven't been to any support groups, nor was I really told about them. Feel like surgery was done and then the office and doctor was done with me. Am I just making excuses... Why have I messed everything up...?

Hope you are feeling a little better now wellbutrin is the only med I have stuck with it suppresses my appetite and gives me energy to exercise ..most importantly it eliminates my depression ...maybe it could work for you...all of the other AD i took caused crazy carb cravings and some actually raise your blood sugar and effect the way you process carbs ...most psych meds have weight gain as a side effect ..weight gain from psych meds is what actually made me feel that surgery might be a good option for me....Very sorry about your mom hope things get better for you ..nothing that i hate more than depression

[swimbikerun 1,041]

I suggest finding the nearest bariatric hospital or Center of Excellence and ask about their support groups. Both pre- and post- Ops attend. Mine has one every month. It's free. We've been told that the people who keep attending the support group do the best in the long run.

I think it would help to just be around other people and help keep yourself on track.

If you can, get on their online groups. Tend to be better than the in person groups.