Yes, so I hear it all the time, "I'm having this surgery because I want to lose weight and gain my health back"... but what I really want to know is, where is that person inside you that is doing it so you can be more attractive? I won't lie, I hated being fat. I did not feel pretty and I do feel a million times better being smaller. I even float across the floor better if that makes sense. I fit my clothes better, I can find a lot cuter clothes and I like shopping and doing make-up. They don't call me "diva" for nothing. I like taking pictures and I like having pretty hair and nails and lots of bright outfits. I love it when my husband tells me I'm beautiful. I personally don't think there's anything wrong with that, because on the inside I am kind, considerate and loving. I will never berate anyone and will always put my hand out to help anyone up, without question.

When it comes down to it, it will always be how you treat yourself as well as others, and sometimes looking our best helps us feel better about treating others and ourselves better. As long as you have a good heart and always remain respectful then who cares if you like to look good.

Anyone else out there willing to admit they have a bit of a narcissistic side?

Hi my name is Paula and I'm so vain. Lol

Health #1 but ready to be a hot mama.

Yes, so I hear it all the time, "I'm having this surgery because I want to lose weight and gain my health back"... but what I really want to know is, where is that person inside you that is doing it so you can be more attractive? I won't lie, I hated being fat. I did not feel pretty and I do feel a million times better being smaller. I even float across the floor better if that makes sense. I fit my clothes better, I can find a lot cuter clothes and I like shopping and doing make-up. They don't call me "diva" for nothing. I like taking pictures and I like having pretty hair and nails and lots of bright outfits. I love it when my husband tells me I'm beautiful. I personally don't think there's anything wrong with that, because on the inside I am kind, considerate and loving. I will never berate anyone and will always put my hand out to help anyone up, without question.

When it comes down to it, it will always be how you treat yourself as well as others, and sometimes looking our best helps us feel better about treating others and ourselves better. As long as you have a good heart and always remain respectful then who cares if you like to look good.

Anyone else out there willing to admit they have a bit of a narcissistic side?

I don't know that narcissism is quite the right term to use because it implies that it's an obsession and I don't think most of us are obsessed..I think it's more an awareness that we are improving in the looks department as we lose the weight regardless of the reason why. That in turn makes us want to further improve by making ourselves now more attractive and that's why we are now wearing makeup again, getting haircuts, buying prettier clothing, etc..

I cannot deny my vanity.

I've been at it for years though. Since the myspace selfie was a "thing."

Health and being a mama some day are my main motivations. Secondly, how my face looks for a selfie. DUH.

LOL. <3

I love putting on my makeup now and looking in the mirror before I head out the door for the day.

Before WLS…i got dressed and left …what a difference 92 pounds makes!!

I love shopping in the same store where I get my kids clothes (old navy a fav these days)….i love searching through the 12's-14's and not the 22 and 24's.

I love walking past a mirror and looking at myself and saying "hmmm….good job girl"

I like when people notice me….ME…and compliment me on my success. I'm learning to graciously accept compliment and not fumble out a response.

So if I'm VAIN……i'm all for it! Loving my band and plication!

Absolutely! I had/have no weight related issues. Granted I knew it was inevitable at the rate I was going that they would arise and soon. I'm 24 years old, I hate being fat. I want to have a family some day. And I was tired of being the pretty face. I want to be gorgeous damn it. And not gigantic.

Oh man! You reminded me of how much I HATED people telling me that I have such a pretty face!! My heart always heard, "With the exception of your face, you're a real tragedy." I don't have to rely on the kindness of others for confidence now. I know I am strong, I know I take care of myself, and I know my husband can't keep his hands to himself. And I love it!

Yes, I admit it. I am a total girlie girl. I pay much more attention to my hair, nails, makeup and clothes then I did before WLS. My hubby thinks im muuuuuch more attractive on the outside , I get nice looks from people who think I look pretty, I love what I see in the mirror, and the first time an adorable male friend said " Girl, you are smokin !!!! " , I said " Thank you ! " ( and then thought , and what are YOU smokin ??? ) !!!! If loving this is wrong, I don't want to be right.

I LOVE the new me....I LOVE going to the gym...I LOVE buying and wearing fashionable clothes....and now that the summer is here, I LOVE being able to do yard work, etc, without a shirt on....

The whole world is vain when it comes to personal looks, image.....look at all the TV shows, magazines, advertisements, etc, etc....it's everywhere!!!! Sex Sells....

It is the overweight, obese people (like myself) who make excuses, and try to play the whole thing down as if it is not important....while inside they all wish....

I was so obese..BMI over50, that I didn't have any vanity. I really needed to lose weight to live the life I want. Becoming hot and vain was an unexpected side benefit...teehee

Other then being morbidly obese I had no other health problems. My father however is also morbidly obese and I am honestly surprised he is still with us. He has had double heart bypass. He needed a quadruple bypass but they couldn't find enough good veins to use because he is so large. He also has diabetes and many other weight related health problems. I could see myself going down his path and I wasn't going to have it. I am post op 4 months. Down 80 lbs. I am one pound away from dropping into the overweight category. So happy. Want to lose 30 more pounds. And yes. I love the attention. People complimenting me telling me how great I look. Started wearing makeup again and buying cute clothes. It's hard to feel beautiful when you feel like a whale.

Would your Dad consider WLS?

Wow this is very intersting post. I would never have thought of you MISS Diva as vain, you have always been so kind and helpful to all of us on this WLS journey. But if the side effect of loving your self from the inside out is what we are guilty of.. Then I raise my hand and say hell ya!

I am finding my strenght back from hidding behind the fat robe as i call it.. It is nice to hear and i finally did that my hubby thinks I am hot! That is a nice and wonderful experince to be honest!

It's actually a little hard for me to separate them out (health vs vanity). especially because mental health is part of our health! I'm having this surgery because I want to:

• be in control of my eating
• be healthy in terms of longevity, avoiding diseases, etc.
• feel healthier - less aches and pains, more physically comfortable in my own skin, able to walk around for hours without my feet killing me
• have more energy to engage in life - go out after work etc.
• take flights and see people I love and new locations, without fear of not fitting into a seat
• look prettier, more fashionable, attractive
• be able to maintain one size for a long period - invest in nice pieces for work, shop in regular stores and boutiques
• look like someone who is in control of themselves and their life
• project an image of a confident successful woman to others - socially and at work - I actually think I do this pretty well, perhaps more so than other people of my size, but I think many people make a whole lot of assumptions about who I am based on the excess weight I carry:
  • that i lack self-esteem and don't respect myself enough to eat well
  • that i lack self-control/willpower
  • that I'm self-indulgent, needy, greedy
  • that I'm not not smart enough to know how to eat properly
  • that I'm too lazy to exercise and take time to eat well
  • that I'm a failure - someone who isn't able to work towards a goal and achieve it

So - even when I think beyond the health benefits there are so many important things that I hope to gain beyond feeling more attractive. But I have NO shame whatsoever about looking forward to that!

Edited May 31, 201412 yr by thesuse2000

@@BellaHugz - then you must not follow me on Facebook or Instagram? Haha The general idea in this thread is just that and I totally agree with what @@B-52 said, as a very large woman I tried to pretend like it was okay and I felt fine being that large but the truth of it for me was that I really didn't deep down inside. It's okay to come out of our coccoons and enjoy the beautiful butterflies we have all or will become!

@@thesuse2000 - Great post! There are so many reasons to do it, and yes one of them surely is to look better.

Nothin' But love girlie..

I'm definitely looking forward to being more comfortable in my skin... I have a naturally loud and outgoing personality, that for years I have suppressed because it's bad enough being "the fattest person in the room" but to add in there "the loud fat chick" too... I'm looking forward to buying cute, trendy clothes, and feeling pretty again. Right now all I wear are tee shirts and jeans or yoga pants. Next summer I'll be nearly a year out, and I plan on buying some sun dresses, and a tee shirt from my favorite baseball team.

@@BellaHugz - then you must not follow me on Facebook or Instagram? Haha The general idea in this thread is just that and I totally agree with what @@B-52 said, as a very large woman I tried to pretend like it was okay and I felt fine being that large but the truth of it for me was that I really didn't deep down inside. It's okay to come out of our coccoons and enjoy the beautiful butterflies we have all or will become!

@@thesuse2000 - Great post! There are so many reasons to do it, and yes one of them surely is to look better.

Hi I read on your facebook you are having a revision. When is that? I am roux n y this Thursday

Edited June 1, 201412 yr by stacy97006