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In need of support



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I decided to come here for some sort of support. Please on the first say that I am just looking for support – not criticisms or negativity of any kind. I'm going through a lot right now – divorce, domestic violence and A protective order later, I'm just trying to get with life and move on. I really am trying to not only get on with my life but in the process, I trying to lose the way that I know I have the ability to do. I was sleeved in September. I was doing pretty good weight Wise until semi recently. My spirit is somewhat squashed right now – I don't know if that's the right word to use or not, but I really want to get back on track. Things got squashed back in December when my husband attacked me and read injured my spine and other areas of my body. I was on a plan to exercise and things of that nature but the domestic violence and injuries involved set me back. I really need to Start exercising and make the dream happen. I am disabled so, pain management and trying to control the pain has been an issue with exercising. I just know that I have to take one step at a time and one thing. I'm the type of person that tries to take everything on it wants but I know better than that right now.

As far as my plea in the beginning, a while back I posted song information as far as things that I was eating that wasn't right with the postop diet and I feel like I got reamed out by a few people. To me, this should be a healthy and positive environment and that's I wanted hoping for. I would just really appreciate a buddy or encouragement or anything of that nature. I don't want to bother anyone but I just would appreciate an opportunity to talk to somebody that is going through what I am. Maybe we can support one another – who knows. I would appreciate any communication or discussion. I just really need to find the encouragement inside myself. It's freaking me out that I've gained weight.

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So very sorry you are having a tough time. You have been through so much, and it sounds as if you are making a fresh start. I am only 9 weeks out, but I cannot imagine having been through what you have gone through in that amount of time.

You must be a very strong person!!! One thing I read recently is that many doctors believe that you can lose substantial amounts of weight for 18+ months with the sleeve. The "six month" window" is perhaps a myth. So this means you have a lot of time to get back on track.

I wish you all the best, if you ever want to chat privately, send me a pm and we can connect.

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Hi, I am sorry you are having such a hard time right now. I can only imagine what you must be going through. This journey has been hard and I don't have stressors as significant as yours. I was sleeved in November and am having issues also. If you would like to talk, feel free to message me. I could use a buddy myself.

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I'm sorry you met such criticism last time. I am recently divorced, he was very controlling and abusive to my children. I was sleeved last march, I would first off like to know how much weight you have gained? Sometimes you can fluctuate. You are strong for getting out of your situation. I have some stress and sleep issues due to my job. I am using medication to help with those problems. I have lost all the weight that I intended to lose however I having a hard time with exercise. You can do it, like I said you are strong. Just need to figure out what is holding you up. Are you logging your food? Plus weight loss slows down when you get close to the 6 months. Then 3 weeks goes by and there's another 3-4 pounds. I'm here if you need someone!

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I'm sorry you're going thru this right now. You're right this should be a safe place to bring things up.

So, my suggestion for you - get back to basics. Do those things you know worked in the beginning. For me, that would be 2 Protein shakes/supplements per day and 3 meals with 2-3 ounces of Protein and a few bites of veggies. Log your food on myfitnesspal or whatever app you want to use - be honest and track everything that crosses your lips. Focus on getting Water in. If you're not exercising and are able to, WALK - it's not only good for your body, it's good for your mind.

If you're open to getting counseling, do it. If not, find a support group or a good friend that you can confide in - sometimes just talking things thru helps clear things in your mind.

Most importantly, be kind to yourself. Treat yourself like you would a friend - do not get down on yourself or tear yourself down with negative self talk. You have enough "negative" going on in your life now - be positive.

I wish you good things.

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Thank you all for your messages of hope and support. For those that would like a buddy and mentioned private messaging me, I would love that… Please send me a PM whenever you get a chance. I am really trying to log myself in on fitness pal.. The wait is fluctuating a bit. The highest I got was 330. Prior to the surgery I was at 312 and now I am about 269. I did get down to 262, then back to 272... 269 pounds is not My goal. I'm realistic about Michael's but that's not my goal. I'm trying to eat simple things I am not trying to eat carbs or anything like that. Really try to take it back to basics. What's crazy is I'm hungry all the time – that doesn't make sense. We only have this little sleeve. I shouldn't be hungry all the time. I've never really experienced this type of thing – prior to surgery I really didn't eat all that much to begin with so my body wasn't burning the calories that need to two. I know I can still lose weight. I just need to get exercising and it's probably get my stress levels under control because stress can cause over eating or at least that's what they say. I'm not blaming it at all on that but I think it does have something to do with it. I just need things to be good little while at least. I don't know if that makes sense to anyone. Things are good for little while, I can build up my strength and my reserves for things…

Blessings to all,

Natalie

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I am so sorry you are having a hard time :-( Have you possibly thought about swimming or Water aerobics? It could be low impact build strength and be relaxing in the water... I hope things get better for you :-)

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I appreciate the suggestion – typically I would jump at doing any Water activity but the pool that I'm able to use is connected to the outdoors and with the medication, I am on, I can't be out in the sun/water… I unfortunately learned that the hard way. I think one of the things that is hurting me is the stress I'm under. I'm trying to work on releasing stress and also trying to clear things on my life that are stressful… That's easier said than done but I'm just trying to take one day at time. I really appreciate any help or guidance you guys are provided. I don't really come on the boards a whole lot but, maybe hear more would help as well.

Thanks a bunch and hope everyone's having a good day,

Natalie

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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      1. LeighaTR

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

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        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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