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I'm still Pre-op, and I'm struck by my increasing anxiety over the whole procedure. I am steadfast in my decision, but I am struggling with this fear that I'm going to fail at this. I have failed everything else I've tried to lose weight - how can this be different? I'm motivated for life change, but there's this little voice in my head reminding me of all the other times I was motivated for change by joining Weight Watchers or a fitness club only to fail at that, too.

Post-op people - when does that fear of failing get replaced with the confidence needed to win the fight?? Or does it ever get silenced?

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I feel the same way! I am scheduled for the sleeve on 2/26/14...just 9 days from now. My surgeon wrote a book called my skinny jeans at last and he said in it to stay focused all the time...whatever it takes. Support groups like this help I think

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I came on this forum tonight specifically because I have been feeling the same way. The feeling of.. why is it going to be different this time? What if I do this and I fail? Thank you for putting it out there. I'm looking forward to hearing from post-op posters on the topic.

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Good topic. For me, the fear is still there. And honestly, I kind of hope it doesn't go away, because if I get complacent I will fail. Taking the sleeve for granted, forgetting the basic sleeve rules of eating, chowing down on sliders - these are the things that will let you fail.

Why will you succeed? Because you have never had a tool as powerful as the sleeve. Because you will come here for support and a thousand friends will cheer you on and cheer you up. Because you are not going to sabotage yourself, and you are going to learn to love yourself and your body and do good things for it, because you dserve it.

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Good topic. For me, the fear is still there. And honestly, I kind of hope it doesn't go away, because if I get complacent I will fail. Taking the sleeve for granted, forgetting the basic sleeve rules of eating, chowing down on sliders - these are the things that will let you fail.

Why will you succeed? Because you have never had a tool as powerful as the sleeve. Because you will come here for support and a thousand friends will cheer you on and cheer you up. Because you are not going to sabotage yourself, and you are going to learn to love yourself and your body and do good things for it, because you dserve it.

Thank you for your encouraging response. I could seriously burst into tears reading it. We'll call them tears of hope. :)

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The sleeve gave me peace with always feeling hungry and never feeling full. Since I have had the sleeve. I am not that hungry..it took that away from me. Yah. Then my sleeve foes not allow me overreact. I listen to my stomach and it tells me when I have eaten enough. Which is very, very little compared to what I ate before the surgery. I was a binge eaten. I have not binged once since my surgery. I don't feel like stuffing my face anymore. And my taste has changed for the better. I was a sugarholic, now I am tempted by that stuff anymore.

Before I had surgery.,I had doubts just like y'all and I'd read the same statements from others of how eating has changed , just like the way I feel now. I am very happy I made this decision. :)

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PS .. Boy does my iPad insert strange words for me. Sorry for my post.

Correction. Sweets I am NOT tempted by this stuff anymore.

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I've been going through the same exact fears (surgery date is the 25th). I've done just about everything... diets pills ect. and often I would lose weight but I would always gain it back. So I know what you're going through. Be strong we'll get through this and be better for it in the long run. :)

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i think one of the great benefits of the sleeve is the fact that for most people, their view of food and the feelings it creates within the mind and stomach are totally changed for life. you won't desire food the way you do now, you won't have cravings as you do now, your entire view on food is so drastically changed that your life is basically reset.

I am looking forward to this. if I underwent this surgery without the confidence that my opinon and desire for food would be radically changed, I wouldn't undergo it. this is too drastic of a surgery and life change for me to be mentally and emotionally the same after as I am now.

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Oh my goodness - you are SO not alone in these feelings. I think that way almost all the time! My surgery is the 24th (only 6 days away), and I have this terrible fear of failure. The only way I ever lost weight was when Phen Phen was on the market. I lost 90 pounds in no time flat, but over the years, it slowly came back plus more. So I have failed many times. Weight Watchers, Atkins, calorie and fat counting....you name it. Some of the threads on here scare me to death when I read them. I just tell myself that every person reacts differently, and that I will forge my own success. I have to. I am so over being fat. Something has to happen, and I can't do it by myself. I am so glad I found this website - I just try to stay away from the negative threads. I am starting my life over at 53, and I can't wait! I had a very long discussion with my surgeon, and together we decided on the sleeve for me. But I still have moments when I wonder if I shouldn't be doing the bypass. So try to remain positive, and I wish you the very best. You will succeed at this - we all will!

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Thank you all so much for the positive energy here!! So glad I'm not the only one facing it. Hearing that my brain will change along with my body is good. I forget that piece and think I will be going it alone without a tool stronger than will power. I'll just take it one day at a time.

Good luck to everyone on here about to get sleeved!! :)

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so happy you are feeling better! I hate to be so graphically simple, but with a stomach the size of a small banana, so long as you make the right nutrition choices (which will be easier since you will probably lose the strong desire for bad foods if you have that now and wont be able to eat but so much before you feel satisfied), you really will have to WORK at failing. once you heal up and lose the weight, you will find you have more energy for exercise and such an that's even more weight lost...it will all work together for your good.

my biggest fear/anxiety is having a leak in my new stomach before it can actually heal over fully. i will be sure to follow my medical team's directions to the T to minimize chances of leaks. other than that...im more excited now than i have been ever before, save my marriage and the birth of my children.

EMBRACE this awesome opportunity for a new life! you aren't alone and the support is awesome...you can do it!

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    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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