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Mixed feelings



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Hi i had my surgery July 2013, so I'm 7 months as of this morning I'm down 160 pounds. 338 to 178. I am definetly proud of this. I'm able to wear size 14 jeans now, but I still think of myself as fat.i was overweight for so many years its hard to get that our of my head. I do have the loose skin on my belly which I'm not happy with, but the weight is mostly gone now. Can anyone else relate or share how to adjust. It's kinda weird I know.

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It's not weird at all....Last week my trainer picked me up off the floor with one hand and I gasped and said are you nuts doing that. You could have broken your back...He said I have lifted a lot more weight then you are. I said, "Oh yah sure"....He said, "you know what your problem is..You still have a fat head."..."What," I said. He said, "you still see yourself at 380 lbs."

Yup he was right.....We know we are smaller and that we have changed..But it is very hard to see ourselves this new way because we have been heavy for so long....That is the part about fixing the mess our heads are in.....It could be that in your mind there is a reason why you think that way. I know there is in mine...Past experiences when I was down and six people had to pick me up....i can't fathom myself being small enough that only one guy can do it.....

I do need to fix that thinking.....One way I read on here was a woman who deliberately went into spaces she was never able to go into. Ex - walking between two people in a corridor, sitting in a booth, sitting in the smallest chair. Things like that..It worked for her!

Might be worth a try.. :)

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Thank gosh! I have the same problem also. I wish I could see what I look like as a stranger....if that makes any sense.

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Yes worth a try. I used to always ask for a table when we went out to eat so I wouldn't be embarrassed If I couldn't fit in a booth but now I can and don't ask for a table. I have a coworker that's been by my side thru this whole thing and she's been telling me good things and all. It helps. But so many years of being overweight doesn't get out of your head to easy.

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tonight I was talking to my daughter and saying that I can't have surgery until my BMI is under 30..she said how much weight do you still want to lose. And I said I don't know. I am still so big....she said don't be ridiculous mom..You can't see how small you are at all can you....You are very small mom...I stared at her in disbelief......

Can I believe her..I just don't know!

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Interesting topic as I just posted this on my blog tonight, Mission Slimpossible.

Went clothes shopping yesterday & for the 1st time in a LONG time, I saw something different in my reflection as I tried on a pair of pants. I took a long, hard look at myself, tilted my head & actually saw myself as "thin." Yes, that's what I said, THIN! I actually fit into size 8 pants. Yes, I said, a size 8. I think my average pant size in high school (31 years ago) was a 10, so I'm fitting into smaller clothes.

I was feeling a little brave, and saw a pretty sleeveless little black dress in the fitting room (size Medium) that someone else left behind. I figured, ah, what the hell, I haven't warn a dress in...well, in years so let's try it on. Oh my goodness. Not only did it fit, but it actually looked really nice! I mean, it really looked nice. I came out of the dressing room to show my husband. He winked and said "very nice," proceeded with, "are you OK?" I smiled because I actually had tears in my eyes. I was overwhelmed with such emotion. I didn't cry but I could feel something deep inside me. It almost felt like a happy confusion because there was no denying that I was no longer overweight.

I'm still amazed. After 1 1/2 years on this weight loss journey, I'm finally comfortable & quite happy in my own skin!

Ahhhhh..... feels good, damn good!!!

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I totally relate to this post.

My husband wanted me to sit on his lap the other day. I said, 'No! I'd crush you!" without even thinking about it first. He just stared at me blankly.

Yeah, it's really hard to remember that I'm not 310 lbs anymore. Sometimes I see myself in the mirror and, more recently, on the show and I just want to cry because I still see myself as fat. It's going to take us a while to get over that, I think.

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This is most hepful to me because I didnt realize this is exactly what im going through..I find myself frustrated when I cant find nothing to fit but its because im shopping in the plus size section still and im thinking right now where will I shop now..sleeved 6/18/2013 hw 349 sw 301 current 206 ....in loose 16 jeans now

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
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