Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

My Husband My Journey



Recommended Posts

I'm always thinking of relevant subjects for Pre and Post op topics that might pertain regardless if you had surgery or thinking about it.

So this morning I'm staring at my Husband across the table, were having coffee, and I'm thinkin'..."this is a great guy..I should tell my new friends on the BPal website about him, he deserves some recognition.

I'll try to make this is short as I can...

My Husbands name is Terry. The day the word 'GASTRIC BYPASS/RouNY' entered our lives. And changed it. He has been a somewhat apprehensive trooper. During my 4 years of research, and my paper literature all over the house, who knew, that even unbeknownst to him, he was learning right along with me. I'd say something, negative, and he'd say, "Well I was reading one of your papers on the table about that and..."lol..wow .

ok skip to: I GOT MY SURGERY DATE!!! YAY (for me anyhow). I'm jumping for joy, doing my happy dance, I look over and he's NOT jumping for joy, no happy dance. What the hell!!??.."what's the matter Babe?..I thought we settled all this?"..Honest to Goodness, its him who was having second thoughts..lol..Here's a synopsis of our conversation.

Terry: I know we discussed all of this, but do I have to eat everything you eat, all the time? :blush:

Me: No babe, its my Journey, how many times have we discussed this. I told you, I refuse to be a 'food Nazi"..But if you could try not to bring to many treats/sweets into the house and leave them hanging around, I'd appreciate that. Just bring in what your going to eat.

Terry: Am I expected to be involved in your exercise routines? :wacko:

Me: ok what's happening here sweetie, I thought we cover all this.

Here's what was happening with him. When I got my actual surgery date. it became real for him, and all his insecurities started to overwhelm him, it was all good, till then. Totally understandable. He'd heard a lot of stories about spouse's leaving once they got skinny..blah blah blah. I had before and again at this moment, reassure him that our marriage/relationship was totally in tact and strong enough to survive almost anything. I believe its the relationships that were in jeopardy BEFORE RouNY was intro'd into their lives, and was inevitable to fail whether Gastric happen or not. WLS is not a marriage destroyer, it can used as an excuse for divorce, but definitely not the cause.

My family and I have dubbed Terry as the "Honarary Gastric" glossary man. He knows more about this lifestyle than me it think. Always asking me if I checked the sugar content of this and that, how many cals are in that one container?..so I let him think its my journey, but really its OURS!! and I'm not even sure he's aware of it :D ..lolololol..thanx for listening.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Your right when a marriage is over is over. It's only a lame excuse to say now your skinny ppl r checking u out blah blah... it's ok the single life is not so bad after all. Your man becomes the vibrator. lolz will never bring disease...lolz

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

lolololol...RIGHT!!!! buzz on raggy woman!!!..lolol

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am glad Terry is a part of your journey. It was not totally that way for me. I have posted about it here before so wont rehash it. But I LOVE your comment about :

I believe its the relationships that were in jeopardy BEFORE RouNY was intro'd into their lives, and was inevitable to fail whether Gastric happen or not. WLS is not a marriage destroyer, it can used as an excuse for divorce, but definitely not the cause.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • bellaamey

      https://alluniqueguide.com/java-burn-coffee-reviews/
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×