Are you comfortable talking about it?

[Defying Gravity 52]

I had a job interview with a big client the day before my sleeve. I told her that I would be taking 2 weeks off from my work. She really wanted me to start working immediately, but said she could wait. Before I know it, she's on the phone with me asking when I'll be back. I said I didn't know because I'd heard many things about recovery times. She asked me flat out, "What, are you getting a Tummy Tuck? " I was so embarrassed (hell, it's like asking a flat chested girl if she's getting a boob job. Presumptuous and insulting!)

I said no and she told me that she'd had one and ended up in the hospital and had been out for a week from work. I was really uncomfortable talking about it, because I have a habit of keeping work and health completely seperate.

I don't really like to tell people about it unless I know they are considering it or they've had it also. Mostly because people assume it's the easy way out (It's actually harder!) or it's like telling them that I'm enormous. It just makes me uncomfortable.

Do you discuss it openly at work, with friends, acqaintances, etc? Or do you prefer to keep it under wraps?

I'm fine talking about it with family and friends, but I really prefer not to discuss it at all.

[kimk1999 450]

I'm the same way. Only 2 coworkers know (not even my boss). One was because we go out to lunch everyday and I was about to start my pre-op diet and I knew she'd know something was up when I would be eating a lot less post op. The other person was one that works at a different facility and we've just been there for email support for each other through the years.

Family - I only told my fiancé and my mom. He told his dad and I got upset with him. Then my mom told my sister and my granny. Who knows who all my granny told (she's a preachers wife). I was wanting to keep this private.

I'm 3 weeks post op.

[DeenaF 38]

I keep it from no one, I'm proud of myself for finally doing something for me! Good luck to you! I hope you much success. I regret nothing!

[kata13 56]

At first I onlly told a few people but it got more difficult as time went on to keep my calendar clear and field peoples curiosity. I figured since I was doing this for me I might as well get behind it and not hide.

[Cherryhair 88]

Nope don't talk about it then people get to place their judgement on it-especially when it comes to work/people can become real judgmental about you taking off work for an extended time to do something they see as optional especially if it increases their work load temporarily

[Postop 404]

No one knows except my immediate family & physicians (that need to).

Edited January 6, 2014 by Postop

[sbarbiegirl 109]

I guess I'm different. I discuss my wls with everyone. I even tell servers when I go to a restaurant that I had wls and I can't eat that much so hold the bread and I will be sharing to bring an extra plate. I figure they can see that I'm fat and at least now they know I'm doing something about it. Everyone is different. I say do what you feel comfortable with.

[DLCoggin 1,788]

I never went out of my way to tell everyone but I also never avoided talking about it. I figured that folks might notice when I lost 100+ pounds so avoiding the subject was temporary at best. I also had done very extensive research to the point that I was completely comfortable with my decision. I wasn't particularly concerned with what anyone else might think about it since I was confident that I almost certainly knew a lot more about the subject than they did. I was fortunate that everyone was extremely supportive but exceptions would not have changed my decision.

[jenn0528 40]

I am indifferent. If you ask, I'll tell ya.

[moviechick00 23]

I guess I'm different. I discuss my wls with everyone. I even tell servers when I go to a restaurant that I had wls and I can't eat that much so hold the bread and I will be sharing to bring an extra plate. I figure they can see that I'm fat and at least now they know I'm doing something about it. Everyone is different. I say do what you feel comfortable with.

I do the same thing. I ask for another plate to share or I ask for a box right away if I'm not sharing. Most of the time I share my plate or my family will share a bit off of their plates. I also am pretty proud of all the hard work that has gone into my journey. Do as you feel what you are most comfortable with.

[fancytiddy 5]

I commend all of you who can openly talk about it . My husband and best friend who has had WLS are the only ones who know. My mom thinks I'm having my gall bladder removed. I am not ashamed but also don't want to deal with *haters*. People always have an opinion and think it's just as easy as diet and exercise. They don't understand I am sick and tired of being sick and tired...and I have NEVER been thin. I was born 9 pounds...weighed 300lbs in 8th grade and it only got worse after kids. One day, I hope to openly tell everyone...but if not...then That will be okay too.

[urkeelingme 9]

I wish no one knew because I have enough to deal with as it is, but when even one other person knows & that person is family, others will find out...no matter what. I just wanted a little time to figure things out & I can't even get that. It kind of sucks.

[webhopper 57]

I plan on discussing it with my family but not with my work peeps.

I'm a supervisor and I don't really want people to know; I will have to work with HR to get the short term disability paperwork filled out; our company will pay for our medical leave for up to 3 months on 100% of our salary. There is just paperwork that has to be filled out prior to doing the surgery. My boss was just out for 2 months with knee replacement.

Edited January 9, 2014 by webhopper

[Seela 1,187]

I'm an open book so yes everyone knows. I have had some people be judgemental and I either walk away or tell them that I'm thrilled with my decision and I am only allowing positive thoughts and gestures so if you don't have anything positive, then please refrain from ever bringing it up again because your negativity really throws off what a great day I'm having. *smile*

[LouiseC 1,029]

I tell everyone. I hold my head up high and happily talk about it. I am proud of the changes I have made in my life. Most people are positive, fascinated, interested or supportive and often it stops any confusion or speculation to just come out with the truth.

We were in the process of selling one house and building another when I had my surgery and when there were legal forms to sign I couldn't sign them within 48 hours of general anaesthetic. On the phone with our banker explaining why I couldn't sign and saying I was in hospital she asked 'what kind of surgery did you have, weight loss?' I was taken aback but answered yes and she shared her own positive WLS story.

I have had mostly positive responses and the couple of negative ones I have had I really don't care about. I have also been privy to hearing others talk about colleagues who have dropped weight quickly and heard the gossip and speculation when people are not honest and open about how they are losing the weight. In my experience, there is more gossip and speculation about those who are not open about surgery but rapidly lose weight than there is about those who are up front and honest about how they are losing weight.

Each person will make their own decision on this about what feels right for them. I do find it odd that a prospective employer asked you though, I have had four staff members who have had WLS in the past two years, and one who will find out his surgery date soon. Not all share it and I would never, ever raise it as an employer but only talk about it when they feel comfortable talking to me. Just not professional otherwise.