I had a job interview with a big client the day before my sleeve. I told her that I would be taking 2 weeks off from my work. She really wanted me to start working immediately, but said she could wait. Before I know it, she's on the phone with me asking when I'll be back. I said I didn't know because I'd heard many things about recovery times. She asked me flat out, "What, are you getting a tummy tuck?" I was so embarrassed (hell, it's like asking a flat chested girl if she's getting a boob job. Presumptuous and insulting!)

I said no and she told me that she'd had one and ended up in the hospital and had been out for a week from work. I was really uncomfortable talking about it, because I have a habit of keeping work and health completely seperate.

I don't really like to tell people about it unless I know they are considering it or they've had it also. Mostly because people assume it's the easy way out (It's actually harder!) or it's like telling them that I'm enormous. It just makes me uncomfortable.

Do you discuss it openly at work, with friends, acqaintances, etc? Or do you prefer to keep it under wraps?

I'm fine talking about it with family and friends, but I really prefer not to discuss it at all.

There is some limited implied consent for the listed emergency contact and the person you're released to simply because you've brought that person into the hospital room with you. You need to make your wishes very clear to your surgeon, anesthesia, anesthesia nurse, and every nurse you talk to while you're there.

I'm sorry you are so isolated. I'm glad you have support here. I wish you the best.

This is what i just posted on a similar thread. I really think this is one of my biggest obstacles. I'm a boss in a hospital. People love to gossip and poke fun at bosses (I've moved up through the ranks over 23 years so pretty aware of how things work). I'm hoping and praying I become more comfortable with the ones who enjoy watching others struggle or fail. Logically I know I shouldn't give a rat's ass. And I sure would hope to inspire those who are thinking about it. But it's still a sticking point for me. Anyway, this was what I just wrote. It's good to see others perspective on this and I'm thankful for these threads.....

"I have told only a few people who I know won't judge me one way or the other (husband, sister, best girl friends). I loathe being under a microscope. I don't like discussing weight with acquaintances. I've read many threads where people say they've been shown nothing but support and told everyone. I'm always amazed at that. My family loves me dearly. I know they want me happy and healthy. But most have little to no Education about WLS and have preconceived ideas that are often off base. My parents have anxiety issues - my mother is terrified of anything medical. One close friend (we are both nurses) talked to me like he was an expert in a subtle, yet condescending way about my plans. I was shocked and disappointed. Did he really think I'd enter into this without tons of preparation and research? What nurse would do that? Most surgeons require at least moderate education. I was testing the waters with him. I realized then that very few people have the ability to walk in someone else's shoes. I'd like to think this isn't true but I think some normal sized people see obese people as slightly stupid about "choices". That doesn't mean they don't like us or even love us - they just sort of doubt us. I'm 45 years old. If I don't ask for your opinion, chances are I didn't want it but that never stops anyone! This will be my biggest challenge - the balancing of who to tell, who to listen to, who to avoid, who to trust. I'm close to getting scheduled. I'll likely be sleeved in the next month. I've only told a few and I'm waiting to the last min to tell my parents - just in case something horrible really happens. Not sure what to tell my boss. I don't need others doubts and worries hanging over me. I have enough of those on my own. I need a few cheerleaders and some empathy. Glad for this site. It has been a Godsend! "

I have always told everyone. I really don't care what people think. It was a choice for me and my life and it is a part of me. Of course you have to do what you feel is best. I have a coworker that had a band as well, she wants no one to know. She only told me now cause I have been open and told everyone I have it. It was easy to figure out since we eat lunch together and I noticed alot of the same habits. But I waited for her to tell me. To each it's own I say. But as far as your boss it's really none of their business to even ask you a question like that. It's your choice whether you want to tell them or not. I would just use a general term, like it's an outpatient procedure I have to get done, and that's it.

Edited February 17, 201412 yr by Loneil

I don't tell many. You can't unring a bell only those serious about needing to know. Or considering surgery. I am forthright about eating well and working out 2-3 x a week. I'm now signing up for a 5 k in Golden Gate park just to make myself walk more. And I want to see more of the Park. It is a couple hours away. Also a good excuse to go away