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True Life Story



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I yall! I asked for help when I was going through a very stressful life event but it was too fresh to talk about at that time. This site has such wonderful people that give great advice so I decided I wanted to share the reason I went through such stress.

I was raised by my Mom and Dad and had a younger Brother and Sister. My Dad died of Cancer in 2008. My Mom died of a heart attack Jan 1st of this year.

In September I received an email from an anonymous person telling me that my "Dad" had been looking for me for 8 years and new that "Linda" (that was my Mom's name) had passed away and was planning to contact me.

To make a long story short, that email led me to find out (at the age of 49) that I was adopted by my Dad and everyone knew this except for me and my 3 children.

I pretty much lost my mind for a few days. I just couldn't process the information.

Then I decided I wanted to find out who my biological father was. Most of the people who could answer any questions for me had already passed on. The only thing I was able to find out from one of my older cousins was his name was Buddy (but that was a nickname) and his last name (which was a very common name).

I finally called the County Clerks office in the county I was born in. I explained my story to the woman that answered the phone. I told her I wasn't sure what my actual name was at birth so we tried my Mom's maiden name and then his last name. She found my original birth certificate with his name on it.

Though I went through a literal hell for a couple of months, I now talk to my biological dad every couple of days and am growing to love him. I even have a brother.

He lives about 2 hours from me and my husband and I drove to meet him 2 weeks ago and I look just like him.

post-168876-0-25679700-1385829772_thumb.jpg

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Omg.. what a wonderful outcome to things. It's like a silver lining. Enjoy!

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Omg.. what a wonderful outcome to things. It's like a silver lining. Enjoy!

Thank you! He's 76 years old. I just hope to be able to have him around for many more years.

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Wow! Wow! Wow! At the risk of overstating, what a wonderful "silver lining" to much heartache. Thankful that you are enjoying knowing your "Dad."

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Wow! Wow! Wow! At the risk of overstating, what a wonderful "silver lining" to much heartache. Thankful that you are enjoying knowing your "Dad."

Thank you! I'm hoping that he'll be able to meet his 3 Grandchildren and 4 Great Grandchildren soon. Which is a new thing for him because he doesn't have any others.

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What an amazing gift you've been given!

Something very similar happened to me recently with a Grandfather. I thought all of mine had died off and then due to a twist of events it turns out I had a living on all the way across the country.

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What an amazing gift you've been given! Something very similar happened to me recently with a Grandfather. I thought all of mine had died off and then due to a twist of events it turns out I had a living on all the way across the country.

Yes, I can see it as an amazing gift now. I hope you've gotten to meet yours and form a relationship. I know that's what I'm hoping for. And my husbands father died before any of our children were born so they realize that they've actually never met a biological Grandfather.

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Wow what a story! I can imagine what an adjustment it must have been for you. My younger son is adopted but he's always known that. If I suddenly found out I was adopted now, that would be a shock all right.

I'm so glad you've made it work so well for you. That can't have been easy and you should feel proud of yourself for it. ((Hugs))

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Wow what a story! I can imagine what an adjustment it must have been for you. My younger son is adopted but he's always known that. If I suddenly found out I was adopted now, that would be a shock all right. I'm so glad you've made it work so well for you. That can't have been easy and you should feel proud of yourself for it. ((Hugs))

Thank you, GG. It wasn't easy for me or my children but now we are focusing on the future. And thank you for the hugs.

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That is so wonderful...congratulations about your new unraveled life..Enjoy!!!!!!!!!!

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That is so wonderful...congratulations about your new unraveled life..Enjoy!!!!!!!!!!

Thank you!

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What a blessing but what an adjustment. I think that puts all the "small stuff" into perspective, doesn't it? And yeah, you look just alike. Uncanny!

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What a blessing but what an adjustment. I think that puts all the "small stuff" into perspective, doesn't it? And yeah, you look just alike. Uncanny!

You know, the thing about that is, now every time I look at myself in the mirror, I see him. It's really is bittersweet.

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You know, the thing about that is, now every time I look at myself in the mirror, I see him. It's really is bittersweet.

My son's mouth and smile are exactly like his birth dad's. His fingers are just like his birth dad, based on the pictures I see. He had a gap between his front two teeth, just like his birth mom. I'm so grateful to have him, but his birth parents sure missed out on a beautiful child. I wonder if he will ever meet them and how he will feel about it. For his sake, I hope they receive him with love if it ever happens. Scares me what lies ahead f him sometimes.

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What a bittersweet story with an amazing outcome. I'm so glad you're getting to know your dad and brother...I cannot imagine the shock you must have had, but it definitely seems to be working for the best.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
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    • KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
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