Pressure NOT to be sleeved

[lswelk 22]

HAS ANYONE ELSE FACED PRESSURE TO NOT BE SLEEVED? My adult daughters are upset with me because I have been moving in this direction. Have had all my tests, received a c-pap machine, been going to mt pcp regularly (am on month 4).

Have lost 13 lbs slowly since beginning. Am 5.5, weigh 232 and am 62. BMI = 38.6.

Their argument is that I can lose weight on my own w/o surgery. I know full well the reasons why i should be sleeved, but I need to be encouraged. Or....are they right? Help!

[lrs 33]

You are doing this for you. That is one reason why I didn't tell anyone except my husband. After I told one of my daughters she asked why did I have it done. I told her I 61 years old and I don't have time to do it with diet alone plus I needed to get the weight off fast. Day after surgery I was taken off of diabetes meds and 1 blood pressure pill. I feel so much better, 40 lbs off in 8 weeks.

Edited October 24, 2013 by lrs

[Arts137 1,811]

This a decision that you must make after research and reflection. Here you are surrounded by a lot of folks who do believe that the sleeve will or is or has worked!

Good luck, and we are with you!

[tigermom12 34]

I'm sorry you are dealing with this. To me...this is a VERY personal decision for ME. I have spent 16 years being overweight and miserable and I'm doing this......no matter what anybody says. Your daughters probably don't know what all you have been through.

And they are "upset" with you? It's not about them and what "they" want. You have done all the work and you know what you are doing. You are doing the right thing. Either they can support you...or shut their mouth. It's that simple.

I know I probably come across rude but trust me...I'm not. I have only told the ones that I thought would support me. Now...if the ones that I thought would support me actually don't then that's on them...not me. I'm going through with this....with or without them. It's their choice.

You keep your chin up and moving forward. You can do this and you deserve this! Big hugs!

[lswelk 22]

You are doing this for you. That is one reason why I didn't tell anyone except my husband. After I told one of my daughters she asked why did I have it done. I told her I 61 years old and I don't have time to do it with diet alone plus I needed to get the weight off fast. Day after surgery I was taken off of diabetes meds and 1 blood pressure pill. I feel so much better' date=' 40 lbs off in 8 weeks.[/quote']

Thanks. Exactly. I am not going to say anything more about it to anyone but my husband. Good idea. I agree that age is a factor for me. Want a good quality of life before it's too late.

[lswelk 22]

This a decision that you must make after research and reflection. Here you are surrounded by a lot of folks who do believe that the sleeve will or is or has worked!

Good luck' date=' and we are with you![/quote']

Thanks so much. I have researched this thoroughly and my PCP highly recommends it.

[AprilS 25]

I understand. The first thing my MIL said was "you don't think you can do this without the surgery?" Well, no. Then I sent a link to my dad from Dr. Oz and he didn't reply. He told my sister that I've already proved that I can lose weight without it when I have my mind set. But what does that really matter? That means with this tool I should be able to do even better. I still haven't told my parents that I'm actually having it though.

[lswelk 22]

I'm sorry you are dealing with this. To me...this is a VERY personal decision for ME. I have spent 16 years being overweight and miserable and I'm doing this......no matter what anybody says. Your daughters probably don't know what all you have been through.

And they are "upset" with you? It's not about them and what "they" want. You have done all the work and you know what you are doing. You are doing the right thing. Either they can support you...or shut their mouth. It's that simple.

I know I probably come across rude but trust me...I'm not. I have only told the ones that I thought would support me. Now...if the ones that I thought would support me actually don't then that's on them...not me. I'm going through with this....with or without them. It's their choice.

You keep your chin up and moving forward. You can do this and you deserve this! Big hugs!

Yes. I think I have been too sensitive to their opinions. I will be strong and move ahead with my husband's faithful support. Thanks so much.

[Allan Cameron 98]

This is a decission that you need to make. You will surely consult with those whose opinions matter to you, but in the end it is your body and your life we are talking about here. No one else should be telling you how to live your life. Like many other here I made the decission in consultation with my spouse, no one else got to comment on the decission prior. Many people knew I was thinking about it (for over a year), but when it came time to actually make the decission, it was me and my wife that had anything to say... Since having the Surgery I've let most everyone know that I've had this surgery, and especially my family I left all of them know that my eating habits were drastically new and different. I am very thick skinned, to the point of being dense sometimes, so if someone disagrees with my opinion or decissions I may not ever know... But so far I've not had anyone state that this surgery was not great for me...heck I've lost over 100 lbs in the first 4 months. Go Sleeve!

[lswelk 22]

I understand. The first thing my MIL said was "you don't think you can do this without the surgery?" Well' date=' no. Then I sent a link to my dad from Dr. Oz and he didn't reply. He told my sister that I've already proved that I can lose weight without it when I have my mind set. But what does that really matter? That means with this tool I should be able to do even better. I still haven't told my parents that I'm actually having it though.[/quote']

We are both "of age" (I a little more so than you). So we should do it for our own sakes. My husband has gone to all the meetings with me, and though he was a skeptic st first is now on board. Good luck to us both!!

[lswelk 22]

This is a decission that you need to make. You will surely consult with those whose opinions matter to you' date=' but in the end it is your body and your life we are talking about here. No one else should be telling you how to live your life. Like many other here I made the decission in consultation with my spouse, no one else got to comment on the decission prior. Many people knew I was thinking about it (for over a year), but when it came time to actually make the decission, it was me and my wife that had anything to say... Since having the Surgery I've let most everyone know that I've had this surgery, and especially my family I left all of them know that my eating habits were drastically new and different. I am very thick skinned, to the point of being dense sometimes, so if someone disagrees with my opinion or decissions I may not ever know... But so far I've not had anyone state that this surgery was not great for me...heck I've lost over 100 lbs in the first 4 months. Go Sleeve![/quote']

Allan, congrats on your weightloss and your thick skin. I need to toughen up, I know. Letting people in on things after the fact was a wise choice. Thanks.

[indecision 863]

Only you can make the decision. You are doing this or not doing this for yourself. Plain and simple.

[Hidden from view 159]

My adult kids were also disapproving when I first mentioned it. So I never mentioned it again (for a year!) until a couple of days before surgery! Fait acompli! They are very supportive now. I think what I read as their disapproval was actually their fear - they didn't like to think of their mother being chopped up.

[lswelk 22]

Only you can make the decision. You are doing this or not doing this for yourself. Plain and simple.

I know. That's the plain truth. I am seeking to learn all I can about adjusting to life after the sleeve in preparation for the lifestyle change. Thanks!!

[lswelk 22]

My adult kids were also disapproving when I first mentioned it. So I never mentioned it again (for a year!) until a couple of days before surgery! Fait acompli! They are very supportive now. I think what I read as their disapproval was actually their fear - they didn't like to think of their mother being chopped up.

Jane. Thanks for sharing your story. I plan not to mention it again to them. I wish I hadn't given them the opportunity to give their opinion. Oh well. Live and learn. I have two more months to keep things to myself. It will be a good exercise in self control to make it through without bringing or letting them into the conversation about MY body!! Thanks so much!