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What did you tell your Employer???



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I am struggling with what to tell my boss about my upcoming lapband surgery. The issue is that I have had 2 other surgeries since working there in the last 5 years and have been relatively open about them (gallbladder and lymphdectomy). I have a great relationship w/ my boss but I still don't want ANYONE at my job to know. I have been a very private person when it comes my decision to have wls. Only my immediate family and 2 fantastic friends know. I have to tell her something cause I will need time off for recovery. I am also worried about what my papers from the surgeon will say that I have to turn in to use my sick leave at work. Should I make up a procedure like hernia or something??? Any ideas?

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Legally you don't have to say anything. But since you've been open in the past, hernia might be the way to go. As for the paperwork, talk with your surgeon and the staff to see what it might say.

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I work for the state of Florida (Department of Corrections) I told my supervisor the truth from the beginning and all he has been doing has been doing is encouraging me and way he can and wished me good luck. I been off since Oct 7 and return back to work on Nov 1 which sounds like a lot of time off but I will only missing 11 working days because we work 12 shifts I was banded on Oct 7, but my started in February with 6 months of supervised diets plus support programs along the way. So yes if you feel comfortable telling them by all means do if not stretch the truth a bit

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Just tell her it is due to stoache and upper G I problems and see if your Doc will put you on disability for as long as you need if you have to lift otherwise just tell your boss that you have had, had problems in the past with your stomache and your doc wants you to go in for surgery then it is your choice weather you want to tell her / him or not and really by law they can not ask you but most will if it is ore than 2 days of missing work so it is your choice and ask your doc if they can word it in a way that they don't need to know.

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i agree with everyone else here, i also didnt want everyone to know i had lapband surgery. i have just said i had abdominal surgery and no one questions it.

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I took a week vacation...no one knows to this day...

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I would be honest.. surely after you start losing weight they will figure it out.. You might have a private conversation with your boss and ask him/her to maintain your privacy... I just don't like making up stories or downright lying... it always comes back to bite you...

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My boss is very tight-lipped when it comes to my co-workers issues. So, I told her when my surgery date was set and explained that I didn't want to make it very public. She totally understood and encouraged me to take as much time as needed to recover. She didn't want me to rush back. She's been very supportive and excited with me since the surgery.

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I really hate lying because if DOES come back to bite you.....but I really did not want work to know. I told them hernia repair. I hope it does not come back to bite me!! I think the surgery papers can be generic (ie tell your surgeon to be general and not specific with the letter) All he has to say is that you had surgery and will not be able to return to work until XXX

If the truth ever has to come out, then I will say I had a hernia repair along with a lapband LOL. I hope I never have a stuck episode during a work lunch!!!

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I am struggling with what to tell my boss about my upcoming lapband surgery. The issue is that I have had 2 other surgeries since working there in the last 5 years and have been relatively open about them (gallbladder and lymphdectomy). I have a great relationship w/ my boss but I still don't want ANYONE at my job to know. I have been a very private person when it comes my decision to have wls. Only my immediate family and 2 fantastic friends know. I have to tell her something cause I will need time off for recovery. I am also worried about what my papers from the surgeon will say that I have to turn in to use my sick leave at work. Should I make up a procedure like hernia or something??? Any ideas?

Like you I wasnt going to tell my employer. I was just going to take a week of vacation and get it done. Then one day it just kind of came out. He was SOOO supportive. Apparently his wife had had it done as well. He made me sign up for short term disability so I could get as much time as I needed off, which I ended up needing!! He made me feel so much better about taking the time off. Best thing I could have done.

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I just said I had to have stomach surgery. Had gallbladder the year before. My boss didn't say anything except ok.

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I really hate lying because if DOES come back to bite you.....but I really did not want work to know. I told them hernia repair. I hope it does not come back to bite me!! I think the surgery papers can be generic (ie tell your surgeon to be general and not specific with the letter) All he has to say is that you had surgery and will not be able to return to work until XXX

If the truth ever has to come out, then I will say I had a hernia repair along with a lapband LOL. I hope I never have a stuck episode during a work lunch!!!

Luckily for me, I'm self employed and didn't have to deal with telling my employer. However, I do work at a couple of my client's offices on a weekly basis, and had to come up with something as to why I would miss a couple of weeks. I ended up telling them the truth, and they were both very supportive.

Before I decided to tell them the truth, I was going to do exactly what you mentioned......tell them I'm going in for (in my case) gallbladder surgery (which was true...had that done at the same time), and omit any conversation about WLS. That way I wouldn't necessarily be lying, and as the weight started coming off, I would just say something like "yeah, I was so sick with my gallbladder issues, I just felt a strong need to take control of my health". For me, this issue has been pretty easy, given my work situation. But if I were still working in a company situation, I don't know how I would handle it. Knowing me, I'd start out somewhat quiet, then end up being very open.

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Like you I wasnt going to tell my employer. I was just going to take a week of vacation and get it done. Then one day it just kind of came out. He was SOOO supportive. Apparently his wife had had it done as well. He made me sign up for short term disability so I could get as much time as I needed off, which I ended up needing!! He made me feel so much better about taking the time off. Best thing I could have done.

VERY nice! They should all be like that :)

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I told my employer and she implemented a rule that no one could eat at their desks while I was going through my liquid diet before surgery. She didn't want anyone eating in front of me. They have been very supportive and someone is always telling me how good I'm looking - so it was the right decision for me ;) every place is different and I get that !

Sent from my iPhone using LapBandTalk

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I am struggling with what to tell my boss about my upcoming lapband surgery. The issue is that I have had 2 other surgeries since working there in the last 5 years and have been relatively open about them (gallbladder and lymphdectomy). I have a great relationship w/ my boss but I still don't want ANYONE at my job to know. I have been a very private person when it comes my decision to have wls. Only my immediate family and 2 fantastic friends know. I have to tell her something cause I will need time off for recovery. I am also worried about what my papers from the surgeon will say that I have to turn in to use my sick leave at work. Should I make up a procedure like hernia or something??? Any ideas?

I'd be leary of "making up a procedure". That could, down the road be held against you as falsification of company records. I've seen it happen...Very sad but true.

MY opinion, if you are not 100% comfortable telling EVERYONE at your workplace, then don't tell ANYONE. Your supervisors, etc are not entitled to know what type of surgery you had. Only any work restrictions you may have. Your bariatric surgeon's team should be very familiar filling out the FMLA paperwork to not indicate any identifying procedure.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

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        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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