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Putting so Much Pressure on Myself



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I am about 3.5 weeks out from revision of band to bypass. I feel like food, thoughts of food, exercise, MFP, Fitbit are consuming every waking moment. I just can't relax and enjoy the journey. I was self pay, so that is part of it....I am just so afraid that I won't lose this weight. I have "tested" myself in the last week with fat and sugar to see "what would happen". I think my dumping is more of a general feeling like crap, headache, cramps, super tired. I ate a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup yesterday and today I gained 1.5 lb. I am going to Overeaters Anonymous trying to get my addiction in check. I am just practically paralyzed with fear that I won't lose 100 lb in a year. I have no patience at all. I need a major reality check!

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OK - major reality check. If you follow the protocol as closely to the letter as you possibly can, you will lose weight. Period. Science and the laws of the universe cannot be denied. An awful lot of folks who have an awful lot of education have done and continue to do an awful lot of research and an awful lot of testing and have proven the success of RnY beyond any shadow of a doubt. RnY has been around for more than 30 years. There is absolutely no doubt that it is the single most effective treatment known to medical science for obesity, type2 diabetes, and more than 30 comorbidities associated with obesity. No doubt.

Stop wasting your energy on Reese's testing. Forget about testing dumping. Some very successful RnY patients n e v e r experience dumping. There is a very long list of benefits from RnY and not a single one of them is attributed to dumping. There is absolutely no scientific evidence that folks who experience dumping are any more or less successful than those who don't. Dumping has nothing to do with success.

Your goal is physical change but your challenge is mental discipline. Stay positive. Stay patient. And again, stay focused on following the protocol as closely to the letter as you possibly can. Success starts with realistic expectations. Focus all of your energy on these things. Irrational fear and "self testing" is not realistic, it's not sustainable and it's most certainly not healthy. The only thing standing between you and success is you.

Now, right this moment, realize and accept the fact that your body is going to find its own way in its own time. There are going to be times when you lose weight quickly. Times when you lose slowly. And YES, there will be times when you don't lose at all (stalls). You KNOW it's coming. You KNOW it's perfectly normal. You KNOW that you cannot change the reality. Trying to do so is a waste of time. Panicking when what you KNOW is coming eventually comes, is irrational and pointless.

Do not wait too long to seek professional help with your fears. You've come a very long way already. The finish line is in sight. There's no shame in seeking help from highly skilled, highly educated professionals who help folks conquer similar challenges every single day. Take responsibility for your own success. In the words of Winston Churchill, "It is of no use saying we are doing the best we can. Success means doing what is necessary".

You're gonna love the new you!!

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Mr Coggin this is the best advice and words and encouragment i have read and heard EVER. And i want to thank you from the bottom of my heart.

I am going to write it down and paste it on my wall at my mirror and read it every day.

Thank you so very much. I needed to read this. Thank you, baie dankie, enkosi kakhulu, muchas gracias.

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Thank you for the kind words obeasta and you're certainly most welcome. My friends call me Dave and hopefully you will too! Lol. Have a great day!!

P.S. Love your blog. Good job!

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Dave.....what can I say, but thank you so very much for taking the time to reply to my "freak out"! I will be re- reading your words of wisdom daily. Thank you!

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OK - major reality check. If you follow the protocol as closely to the letter as you possibly can' date=' you will lose weight. Period. Science and the laws of the universe cannot be denied. An awful lot of folks who have an awful lot of education have done and continue to do an awful lot of research and an awful lot of testing and have proven the success of RnY beyond any shadow of a doubt. RnY has been around for more than 30 years. There is absolutely no doubt that it is the single most effective treatment known to medical science for obesity, type2 diabetes, and more than 30 comorbidities associated with obesity. No doubt.

Stop wasting your energy on Reese's testing. Forget about testing dumping. Some very successful RnY patients n e v e r experience dumping. There is a very long list of benefits from RnY and not a single one of them is attributed to dumping. There is absolutely no scientific evidence that folks who experience dumping are any more or less successful than those who don't. Dumping has nothing to do with success.

Your goal is physical change but your challenge is mental discipline. Stay positive. Stay patient. And again, stay focused on following the protocol as closely to the letter as you possibly can. Success starts with realistic expectations. Focus all of your energy on these things. Irrational fear and "self testing" is not realistic, it's not sustainable and it's most certainly not healthy. The only thing standing between you and success is you.

Now, right this moment, realize and accept the fact that your body is going to find its own way in its own time. There are going to be times when you lose weight quickly. Times when you lose slowly. And YES, there will be times when you don't lose at all (stalls). You KNOW it's coming. You KNOW it's perfectly normal. You KNOW that you cannot change the reality. Trying to do so is a waste of time. Panicking when what you KNOW is coming eventually comes, is irrational and pointless.

Do not wait too long to seek professional help with your fears. You've come a very long way already. The finish line is in sight. There's no shame in seeking help from highly skilled, highly educated professionals who help folks conquer similar challenges every single day. Take responsibility for your own success. In the words of Winston Churchill, "It is of no use saying we are doing the best we can. Success means doing what is necessary".

You're gonna love the new you!![/quote']

Dave, u committed on one of my post, and u r such a great encourager. And this post has even helped me. I wish more could read it. Ty

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OK - major reality check. If you follow the protocol as closely to the letter as you possibly can' date=' you will lose weight. Period. Science and the laws of the universe cannot be denied. An awful lot of folks who have an awful lot of education have done and continue to do an awful lot of research and an awful lot of testing and have proven the success of RnY beyond any shadow of a doubt. RnY has been around for more than 30 years. There is absolutely no doubt that it is the single most effective treatment known to medical science for obesity, type2 diabetes, and more than 30 comorbidities associated with obesity. No doubt.

Stop wasting your energy on Reese's testing. Forget about testing dumping. Some very successful RnY patients n e v e r experience dumping. There is a very long list of benefits from RnY and not a single one of them is attributed to dumping. There is absolutely no scientific evidence that folks who experience dumping are any more or less successful than those who don't. Dumping has nothing to do with success.

Your goal is physical change but your challenge is mental discipline. Stay positive. Stay patient. And again, stay focused on following the protocol as closely to the letter as you possibly can. Success starts with realistic expectations. Focus all of your energy on these things. Irrational fear and "self testing" is not realistic, it's not sustainable and it's most certainly not healthy. The only thing standing between you and success is you.

Now, right this moment, realize and accept the fact that your body is going to find its own way in its own time. There are going to be times when you lose weight quickly. Times when you lose slowly. And YES, there will be times when you don't lose at all (stalls). You KNOW it's coming. You KNOW it's perfectly normal. You KNOW that you cannot change the reality. Trying to do so is a waste of time. Panicking when what you KNOW is coming eventually comes, is irrational and pointless.

Do not wait too long to seek professional help with your fears. You've come a very long way already. The finish line is in sight. There's no shame in seeking help from highly skilled, highly educated professionals who help folks conquer similar challenges every single day. Take responsibility for your own success. In the words of Winston Churchill, "It is of no use saying we are doing the best we can. Success means doing what is necessary".

You're gonna love the new you!![/quote']

Dave thank you! This is going on my wall so I can read it and remind myself of where I am! Thank you again!

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      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
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