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Hungry but scared to eat...



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I just want to know if there is anyone out there like me...

I am 6+ months post surgery...I've lost 90+ pounds. People say I look great...I feel better physical because I feel lighter and have more energy than before.

I sometimes (not often) can say okay I look good. I still see myself as heavy even though I'm a healthy weight. The scale reads the same yet I feel heavier. I get cravings for Snacks and I allow myself to have snacks that are on the healthier side...I'll have lots of fruit, some walnuts, cheeks it reduced fat or sugar free 80 calorie ice cream and all this is not everyday I try to have fruit mostly.

I've been getting very worried about gaining weight back. Yesterday a family member questioned a craving I had knowing I probably would have had a very small portion and that made me feel mire self conscious.

I then completely lost my appetite and didn't have dinner and now I am terrified of eating. Today I had a Protein Shake and a Caesar side salad for lunch from Wendy's just to please my daughter so she shouldn't worry. I want to lose more weight now even though my surgeon, my primary doctor and others told me I've lost enough.

What is happening? Shouldn't I be happy to have lost the weight? I'm hungry but the thought of eating anything other than a Protein shake and Water maybe broth makes me wanna cry.

Any feedback would be appreciated.

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Here's a pic of me...now I feel big not enough weight lost..I'm sorry I do not mean to offend anyone...this is not a cry for attention...I'm really struggling right now...

[ATTACH]4786[/ATTACH]

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I can app relate to what you feel ! I am 5 1/2 months post op and about a month ago I went to see my sister. My mom was there as well and they both kept on praising me about the weight loss and how good I look! Then we sat down to eat. My sister had made spaghetti with a ground turkey meat sauce that was loaded with veggies. I measured out 2 1/2 oz. That's all I could eat at that point. It was only the sauce and mostly the meat and veggies. Mom mom said in front of everyone "wow, that sure is a lot of food you really should try to stick with smaller portions or you will gain all the weight back" I was so pissed off !! I couldn't believe she said that! I told her it was only 2 1/2 oz. and that my nutritionist wanted me to work up to a half cup(4oz) she rolled her eyes and sighed... My sister said to her" why are you talking to her that way? Look at how much you are eating" it really got under my skin and ever since then I have felt fat and question every meal I eat! I can't seem to get passed the insult that was obviously meant to make me feel bad! There are many "haters" who will try sooo hard to bring you down and we can't let them win !!!

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I can app relate to what you feel ! I am 5 1/2 months post op and about a month ago I went to see my sister. My mom was there as well and they both kept on praising me about the weight loss and how good I look! Then we sat down to eat. My sister had made spaghetti with a ground turkey meat sauce that was loaded with veggies. I measured out 2 1/2 oz. That's all I could eat at that point. It was only the sauce and mostly the meat and veggies. Mom mom said in front of everyone "wow' date=' that sure is a lot of food you really should try to stick with smaller portions or you will gain all the weight back" I was so pissed off !! I couldn't believe she said that! I told her it was only 2 1/2 oz. and that my nutritionist wanted me to work up to a half cup(4oz) she rolled her eyes and sighed... My sister said to her" why are you talking to her that way? Look at how much you are eating" it really got under my skin and ever since then I have felt fat and question every meal I eat! I can't seem to get passed the insult that was obviously meant to make me feel bad! There are many "haters" who will try sooo hard to bring you down and we can't let them win !!![/quote']

I'm so sorry that happened to you and with your mother to make things worse...in my case it was my father...What is going on? They just don't understand I guess. Its so hurtful and especially coming from them...as if we already don't have our own mental issues with body image...I told him it makes me want to lose a lot more and he agreed! My teenage daughter tells me not to believe him and take doctors advice instead she tells me not to lose anymore but honestly down deep inside I really feel like I need to be a lot thinner. I'll talk to my surgeon next month but this feeling hunger and not eating mental conflict has me feeling on edge and puts me in a bad mood.

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I truly believe you look amazing. I call it "fat chick mentality"... We will always see ourselves as overweight. It's something we need to fix. Years ago I lost a bunch of weight & always saw myself as obese. I was FAR from obese. I'm only 2 months post & 49 lbs down, but this fat chick mentality is something I will have to work on. I wish u the best.

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Its amazing how parents can be so mean about things they say but they don't see it being mean at all. Both my parents have made comments about how much I had on my plate till I got out a measuring cup and showed them it was a 1/2 cup of food. While their plates are filled to the max. I've even gotten mean and made comments about their plates. It shuts them up real fast and I've even pissed them off but they've kept quiet the past few months so obviously that worked. I just think that jealousy gets the best of them amd thats why we get the comments.

You look amazing and I agree with an earlier post that I think we will always see the bigger person in the mirror. The only way that I see the difference is putting a old and new pic side by side.

HW:331 SW:319 11-26-12 CW: 196 8-16-13 GW:170

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Our family is our worst enemy. Surround yourself with people that boost you up. Y'all weren't that heavy to begin with but I can see we're your self esteem issues come from.

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At least I know I'm not alone. Thanks everyone... I have to try to fix this image of myself now but it's not easy.

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My mother does it to me already and I barely had surgery on the 6th of August. But I think that she, maybe all of them, think that they r helping us. And my oldest daughter, who is 22, hasn't done it to me, but when she talks to my mom, and my mom tells her what I have taken a bite of, my daughter comments that I shouldn't b eating that stuff, it's not healthy. But they are both over weight. I don't take it personal. I really think they think they r trying to help.

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    • LeighaTR

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

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        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
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