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Struggling not to fall back into old habits!



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I've been having such a hard time this past week or two, I have rheumatoid arthritis & since my surgery in Jan, I took myself off the prednisone, because it increases your appetite, but I have been having a lot of swelling because of the heat & humidity we've been having on the east coast. So I had to start taking it again, but I'm rattling ALL THE TIME! Even when I'm not hungry I find myself in the kitchen looking for something to eat, I've been trying to make smart choices , like fruit, sugar free Jello, tuna, Protein Drinks, but I never feel satisfied. I stopped taking it again I'm terrified of gaining weight back, I've lost 109lbs, I got used to loosing 15-20lbs a week,which I New was going to slow down, & I settled into about 10lbs a month, which is still ok, but this week when I weighed myself I lost 1lb!! It has me freaked out. It's been to hot to walk, plus my knees are a mess from the arthritis ( they both need to be replaced) & I joined a gym that is opening right by my house, the only problem is there not opened yet. Ok I'm done whining, but if anyone has any ideas or words of encouragement it would be greatly appreciated. Thanks peace, Mary

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Hang in there Mary! I am in upstate SC and I know between the rain and the heat its difficult. I have been fighting my own demons from the unhealthy eating habits lately myself.....too much time indoors and it's working on my last nerve!

I will say a prayer for you! Keep reaching for the healthy stuff...and try to read or distract yourself in some other non-food way. (It's easier said than done, I know!)

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Mary,

We are in the same boat my dear. I have RA and have been on pred for about 6-7 years. Before surgery my dose was 20 mg a day and I am now down to 2.5. I can't seem to get off of it due to hip pain that flares up each time I try. I am also on actemra and methotrexate for my RA. I had the surgery due to the pred usage and I am so glad I did. I had begun to get the moon face from the start of cushings and headed down a bad path. I am 13 months post op and have lost about 117. My weight is stable now and I am happy where I am.

As for the grazing I truly believe part of it is mental. I know that I am not hungry - I remember what hunger feels like and this is not it. I remember waking up early in the morning and feeling like I had never eaten before - which was all pred. Now I just feel an urge to snack, and I honestly think it is my brain that is telling me that I am hungry. It comes down to choices - I can choose to give in ( which I sometimes do) or fight against it and drink Water or eat just a few bites of something. I do notice that I get these feelings the most during and right after a flare up. For years we gave into the pred hunger because we felt like we were going to starve to death. Now we have this awesome tool that restricts our intake and we know when we are full. However pred messes with everything and mainly the brain.

I don't worry about gaining the weight back. I worked too damn hard to have this fail. I think the key is being honest with ourselves and not allowing our brains to throw temper tantrums. When I get that feeling I try to say to myself am I truly hungry or is it something else.

Not sure if this helps, but I wanted you to know you are not alone in the battle of pred! Send me a message if you want to talk more.

Samantha

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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    • KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
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